When I Grow Up

Ever since Darren was a little boy he has wanted to grow up to be one thing: a shark. Darren used to dream of doing nothing but swimming in the ocean and devouring fish. By the time Darren was twelve he could name almost every species of shark known to science, was the star of his middle school swim team, and constantly researching methods to turn himself into a shark. However, being on a sports team did not save Darren from ridicule. He was always so open about what he wanted to be when he grew up, and by the time puberty hit being a shark was no longer cool. He did not mind the bullying, but welcomed it. He needed to learn how to defend himself for when he finally reached his goal.

When Darren was a senior in high school, he had become the bully. If someone was smaller or weaker than him, they learned to stay away. His bullies had become the bullied, and Darren was proud of his progress. Despite his constant fighting, Darren had been accepted into a top university in the country and was planning to major in biophysics. He had no friends, was barely speaking to his family, and he did not care. He may not have been born a shark, but he was going to learn how to make himself one.

Fifteen years and several degrees later, Darren was a successful genetic engineer and software designer. He founded a small company that eventually grew and was now worth millions. The one thing Darren had not done was find a way to alter his DNA so that he could finally become a shark. He tried and failed many times and after his last attempt landed him in a courtroom, Darren decided he needed to take a different approach.

Darren was visiting his company’s warehouse that was allegedly used for storage. Only Darren and a few trusted employees knew what was really going on. Darren walked up to the door and entered his passcode on the keypad and went inside.

“Good evening, sir,” said a random employee by the door as he entered. Darren never bothered learning their names. Sharks didn’t need to know names, they only needed to know what was food and what was not.

“Good evening. Did the latest shipment of supplies come in? I have been expecting them for a week now.” Darren said.

“Yes, sir. Avery has already unloaded the truck and has started to organize parts for assembly. He is hopeful that this model will work better than the last.”

“I hope so. This stuff is not cheap. Machines may actually be more costly than even the most sophisticated genetics lab.” Darren walked away, heading towards the back of the warehouse. He stopped when he reached a platform where his head mechanic stood.

“Hello, Alvin. How much longer until she’s ready for a test drive?” Darren asked.

“It’s Avery, sir. Not much longer. I have a few adjustments to make and we want to test the resistance to pressure before you actually use it.”

“You didn’t answer my question. I want specifics. Days? Weeks? I’m sure I don’t need to remind you that I am not a patient man, Adam. I have wanted this for thirty years and this year, I plan on getting exactly what I want. No more failures. I can’t afford them.”

Avery flinched at Darren’s harsh tone. “Sir, I cannot be much more specific. My goal is to make my final adjustments and have pressure testing completed in two weeks. If she can’t withstand the pressure of the sea, I’m afraid it could be at least another month before we’re ready for another pressure test. Also, sir, my name is Avery.”

Darren narrowed his eyes at his employee. “You better hope there are no delays, Avery. I’ll be sure to remember who you are if you fail.”

Avery almost didn’t notice his own body trembling as Darren stomped out of the warehouse. Left alone, he resumed his work.

Two weeks later Darren received a call that his machine passed all inspections and was ready for a test drive. He raced to the warehouse so fast the fifteen minute drive there from his home only took five. As Darren walked through the warehouse he couldn’t help but wear a huge smile on his face. Today was the day! Once he did a test drive all that was left was putting the finishing touches on his program and he would finally be a resident of the ocean.

Avery waved at him as he reached the back of the warehouse that connected to a dock. He could see his machine being lowered into the water. “Sir! She has passed all preliminary tests! Would you like to test drive her?”

“Of course. Let’s head into the lab now. I’ll need your assistance once the download is complete.” Darren turned and went inside with Avery trailing behind him.

Once in the lab Darren sat on a couch that had been placed in a corner. He hooked himself up to a heart monitor and grabbed his laptop.

“Avery, I need you to help me with this automatic blood pressure cuff. You will need to monitor my vitals signs and my brain activity on the screen above the couch. Once the program has started I’ll be under for about fifteen minutes. If I don’t wake up, call my assistant at the office. She knows what to do.”

Avery nodded his head and did as he was told. “Sir, before we start, I think it would be wise to stay as close to the lab as possible. If anything was to go wrong we don’t want to lose the machine.”

“Don’t you know I’m smart enough to have already thought of this? I’m not even going to swim a mile out. I just want to see if the sensors I installed are working. Now, I’m going to lie back and when I do I need you to hit the enter key and initiate the program.” Darren ordered as he placed a large black headband with wires connected to his laptop on his head. Darren lied back and Avery hit enter.

Cold. Wet. Floating. Darren could feel the cold water of the ocean against his metal body as his consciousness entered the body of his mechanical shark. Ever since his failed attempts with gene splicing and completely rewriting human DNA into shark DNA, Darren has put all of his time, money, and brainpower into this machine. It was not easy, which is why he had hired a staff to build the machine in the first place. A mechanical great white takes a lot of time and energy that Darren just did not have. He did make time for the brain, however. The brain had to be perfect for his plan to work. He worked meticulously to ensure he could transfer his consciousness into the machine, and he wanted to do more than just be part of it. Darren wanted to feel the machine. He had to be able to feel the cold water, taste the salt, smell blood from a mile away. He deserved the full experience.

Darren swam out into the ocean and could barely contain his excitement. He’s finally done it! He may be inside of a mechanical body, but it’s a mechanical shark body. He swam a little further and felt his fin hit the air. “Just like Jaws,” he thought. Darren soon turned and swam back to the dock behind the warehouse to return his magnificent machine home and his mind back into his original body.

When Darren woke up on the couch he was grinning ear to ear. “Avery, that was fantastic! My mind transferred flawlessly! I could feel the water, taste the water! The machine ran smoothly. How did things look on this end?”

Avery looked grim. “The machine performed as expected. I’m afraid your body did not, sir. Your heart rate climbed to the 180s, and your brain activity was off the charts. I’m not sure if your body would survive a longer run.”

“Nonsense. My heart rate was up because I was having the time of my life! I want the machine examined to ensure it can stay out for an extended amount of time.”

“I’ll start first thing in the morning, sir.” Avery sighed. There was no point trying to reason with his boss.

Darren went home elated. Never in a million years did he think he would succeed after his last failure. Trying to change the structure of human DNA did not go as well as he thought it would. After his human trials failed and the poor volunteer’s family sued him, Darren’s money was starting to run out. He tried one last, even more secret trial on himself, but all he achieved from that was giving himself inoperable cancer. Darren prepared for bed so he could get a head start on the day. He needed to run a few things by his assistant before his final transfer into the shark.

The next morning Darren arrived at this office just as the sun rose. His attorney was going to be there in an hour and he wanted to make sure he had everything in place. The plan was to split what money was left between his employees and local charities. His assistant already had a copy of his DNR and living will, not that Darren thought anyone would fight for his human body to live. Now was the time to finalize all paperwork because tonight was the night. He almost felt bad for Avery. Darren had actually grown to like him.

After Darren’s attorney left with the latest legal documents, Darren called his assistant and instructed her to be at the warehouse at ten o’ clock that night. Darren then grabbed a piece of paper, scribbled a note and placed it in his front pocket. Soon he wouldn’t need pockets anymore, and he couldn’t wait.

Nine-thirty approached as Darren entered the warehouse and went to his lab. Avery was standing by the couch looking grim..

“Sir, I really can’t condone this. You could die this time!”

“Nonsense. The machine passed your latest inspection. You’ve confirmed she can withstand being at sea for at least forty years.” Darren placed the headband on his head and nodded towards the laptop. “When my assistant arrives, she’ll know what to do.”

Avery hit enter.

Darren felt at peace for the second time in his life. All he could feel and taste were the cold and salt of the sea. He was finally free. The separate computer installed into the mechanical shark should keep his consciousness alive until the shark loses power. Darren has had a life on land, and now he will have one at sea. If Darren could he would be grinning ear to ear as he swam out into the dark.

Avery sighed. Darren’s body was still on the couch, alive. How is he going to explain this? Just as panic set in, a young woman walked toward him.

“Hello. You must be Avery. Darren mentioned you. I’m Vanessa, his assistant. Don’t worry, I will be handling his body and all the details from here. I was told to make sure you look in his front pocket.” She said as she began making calls to transport the body to the hospital. Avery heard her mentioning a DNR as he pulled a folded piece of paper from Darren’s pocket.

THANK YOU, AVERY. YOU WILL FIND A LARGE AMOUNT OF MONEY IN A NEW ACCOUNT FOR YOU. VANESSA WILL MAKE SURE YOU GAIN ACCESS AND HELP YOU GET SOMEWHERE WHERE YOU WILL BE SAFE AND HAVE NO LEGAL TROUBLES FOR YOUR WORK HERE. IF YOU’RE EVER IN THE OCEAN, TRY TO SPOT THE SHINY METAL SHARK AND COME SAY HELLO. DARREN

Avery smiled. The lunatic boss he’d been warned about truly was a genius.