Tywrick

"I need you to clear your mind and relax... I want you to think of a warm summer day. The constant breeze caresses and cools your skin. All you see for miles is an endless field of red poppies. You lie down on your back. The underbrush partially engulfs your body. You inhale the subtle fragrance of this grand pasture, relaxing even more, taking deeper breaths and savoring the presence of this beautifully set moment."

The grey leather couch of Dr. Ted Theisen was cold on my bare arms, giving me a mild case of goosebumps. He's known for his unrivaled work with past life regression. His many credentials included a book he wrote titled, Yesterday Inside. I, being a new patient, was skeptical about his abilities but needed to find answers to questions only his skills could provide...

"You let go of all your worries, all your fears. Nothing matters to you except blissful serenity. Nothing can hurt you here. This is your world and your rules. The wind begins to settle down. The overgrown brush grows in front of your eyes and slowly begins to cover the clear blue sky..."

All my life I've felt incomplete, like something was missing. My parents gave me the name Casey. This was confusing because I thought my name was Tywrick. I would bicker and cry out to them that my name WASN'T CASEY! By the time I turned four they reluctantly gave me the nickname Tye. It was a truce and apparently worked because I stopped nagging them about it.

My night terrors were fierce and outlandish. They were filled with monsters and shining knights of amour that were always in battle against each other, causing many restless nights of sleep. I didn't know at the time the constant stress I was putting my family through...

Around the tender age of six, I was able to explain myself better. I had disjointed memories of another time and place that were somehow mine, I just couldn't quite connect the dots. When I spoke normally, I would use words like 'rogue' and 'simpkin' and was always met with "What did you say?" or "How do you know that word?" My parents also claimed I spoke with an accent from age four to five. They thought I was autistic and sought a medical explanation for my cryptic behavior. I couldn't get through to them, it was frustrating.

One August night after dinner in 2007 when I was ten, I overheard my parents talking in the kitchen. They were having a heated discussion about me.

"What if he's acting out a past life?" my mother questioned my father.

He almost choked on the water he was drinking and sprayed it all over the floor when he heard my mother's words. He turned to her and said,

"Are you serious? That has to be the most absurd thing I've ever heard!" He was stubborn and barely entertained the possibility.

I peeked around the corner into the green and white decor of our large kitchen. It was a mess from the aftermath of dinner preparation. I listened as they continued to speculate. My mom, perceptive as she was quickly added,

"Well, at least it's an idea. Have you come up with anything to explain the way he is? No, you haven't! You think it's from all the drugs we did in our 20s."

My dad belly laughs, "I'm telling you, that has to be the answer!"

She looks at him with a smirking glare. "How can that be? All our other kids turned out normal."

The sound of those hurtful words penetrating my ears brought on a sense of shame. I turned around and stormed to my room. I knew I was different. I just didn't know how different. I paced around taking my frustrations out on action figures I hadn't played with in years. My mom's words continued to echo in my mind.

The unanswered questions floating in my head began to multiply. One of them sent me searching for a dictionary to look up past life. The first part of the meaning didn't do much for my limited cognition. The second part included the words -previously incarnate. I didn't know this word and looked that up too... This was it! I thought to myself. I walked over to the mirror and gazed into my lost eyes, wondering who Tywrick really was. I slowly declared to myself — I've...lived...before! It was a flash of truth that hit me all at once. My juvenile condition hindered full understanding, but I was getting closer.

As I got older, some of the memories faded away, some remained. I never forgot about Tywrick and the reoccurring dreams with the image of a beautiful woman wearing a silky pink night gown. She never interacted in any way. She only observed.

Near the edge of my twenty-first birthday, I began feeling that burning desire again. Almost daily, I found myself involved with the elusive question that begged to be answered. Who is Tywrick? This brought me to Dr. Ted. I explained all this to him before my appointment began. He believed every word and sympathized with my endeavor. He continued with my session...

"Your breathing is uniform, it's easy to breath and feels good. You close your eyes as the brush cancels all the remaining light. Your thoughts begin to slow down until they cease to move at all. You can now only listen. Listen to my words as they guide you home. The memory of this home is fractured, incomplete... You become dizzy as your mind begins to drift down a path, like water circling the drain as it exits the sink into unseen space. This space contains the missing link between now and then, and here and there. You are no longer here but there. You are no longer now but then. You are no longer in the field of poppies but somewhere different, somewhere in the deep past. Your thoughts remain immobile, held hostage by the forever bridge. This bridge invites you to cross it. Now stand up proud as Tywrick, and cross the bridge. NOW!

Raising his voice startled me, but that was the point. My eyes sprung open within the daydream-like trance right into a place vaguely familiar. The massive red oaks and the long, thick moss-ridden vines connecting them were the prominent features. This forest was heavy and vast. The canopy stole most of the sun, leaving the floor barren and dim as the evening twilight. The smell was earthy, like a bog filled with ripened peat moss. The only sounds were frogs chirping in the distance as they searched for their annual mates. I began a panoramic view of the area and slowly turned clockwise wondering how this was even possible. As I neared completion of the full circle, I stopped when I saw her. She was standing alone, ten yards away dressed in pink as always. Her primitive elegance was genuinely attractive. She appeared bashful and would only look me in the eye for a few seconds at a time. I was captivated.

"What do you see, Tywrick?" the doctor asked. His voice invaded my concrete illusion and came to me in surround sound.

"I see her... She's standing over there by a silvery weeping willow. She stares at me then looks away. Her bright green hair is full of spiraling curls and her eyes are blood red. Who is she? I feel I know her, but I don't. Who is she?"

The doctor responded in a softer tone. "Exactly, my friend... Who is she? She welcomes you home Tywrick... Ask her! Ask her who she is without moving your lips. No need to approach her. Go ahead, ask her."

I did what he said and thought the words instead of speaking them. Her reaction was unexpected. Her face became expressionless as a single tear ran down the right side of her rosy cheeks. She turned her back to me and slowly raised her arms into the air. Her gown fell to the forest floor and shimmered as it dissipated, revealing her ivory naked back side. What followed was truly amazing... The forest became motionless. The sound of bones cracking filled the air. I saw a metamorphosis happening right in front of my eyes. Her back began to widen and arch. Shoulders became broad. Her curly green hair fell from her head and melded with the ground. Her dainty extremities began to lengthen until they were doubled in size, then tripled. She fell to the soft, mossy ground on all fours. I watched as auburn-colored scales began to rapidly form all over her body. Simultaneously, her finger and toenails were replaced with long black talons that curled. They dug in the ground as she flexed them. My eyes widened with suspense as I watched black leathery wings sprout from her enlarged back. They made a wet squishing sound as they grew to the span of over twenty feet. Her tail was as long as her body, with a pitchfork formation at the end. This all happened in less than a minute. Her rebirth was complete. She gradually turned to face me, using slow, drawn-out steps. The anticipation was taunting. As soon as I saw her true self revealed, my world stopped... I inadvertently took two steps back, while my hands went to the sides of my head. Rapid imagery of people, places and objects appeared in my mind one after another. They were paired with interwoven sounds of joy and distress. The accompanying emotions were surging and overwhelming. It was as if a thousand years were all condensed into a flashback lasting ten seconds. When it was over, I fell to my knees as the rush from this experience was barely containable.

What stood before me, was a thirty-foot tall female dragon I called Maddith. The memory of her became crystal clear. She saved me. My eyes, full of tears rose to hers. My mouth trembled with affection upon realizing it was really her. I walked toward her and slowly raised my twitching right hand to touch the gift of angels from a time forgotten.

"Casey! Casey! Are you there?"

At the worst possible time the doctor brought me back. I became defensive at his hand touching my shoulder.

"WHY! why why why did you bring me back, I wasn't done!"

"You stopped responding to me Casey, I thought I lost control."

"I didn't hear you, but I was there! I need to go back at once, send me back there NOW!" I demanded.

The Doctor looked at me and saw the stern conviction in my eyes. He began penciling in his notebook. I got up from the couch right in his face and brazenly shared my thoughts,

"Whatever you did worked! Send me back! I need to see her again! She was real, I could almost touch her! This visit is costing me a ton of money, it should go my way... right?"

The doc reassured my concerns, "Please calm down Casey, you will go back, but first I need to know who she is!"

I calmed down even though I really wanted to grab him by the collar and throw him to the ground. Tywrick was acting out. I quickly had to remember what Casey would do in this situation, so I returned to the couch and laid down... my mind still bursting with mental anguish. I looked toward the black and white diamond pattern of the ceiling and explained.

"Maddith! Her name is Maddith. She is my savior as I am hers. She is a dragon. That's right! A full-grown Palmasian Hedge Dragon from the forest of Alcor. This glorious place was tucked away in the foothills of the Thogrun mountains, which I believe was in the realm of... of, Ellastry! Maddith saved Tywrick when he was just three years old. She follows me to this life as Casey and comes to me in my dreams. But why? I feel I have a chance to fulfill a legacy and I need your help... Please allow me to see her again!"

The doctor stood up to retrieve a laptop from his large oak desk. He sat down and briskly typed. He looked up at me every few seconds over the top of his reading glasses, then suggested I close my eyes and relax... I could hear his chair moving closer to me, then a whisper in my ear.

"Don't breathe. Don't take another breath! You don't want to breathe until you cross the open bridge you're standing on. Your mouth is ajar from the apparent surprise of knowing you found her, but nothing comes out. No words, no breath, no nothing. You can feel her. She wants you to feel her. Your effervescent energy intertwines. There is no severing this connection which is eons in the making... It's time to resolve this. NOW BREATHE!"

I returned to that archaic forest planted on one knee gasping for air as I looked around for her. I couldn't see her anywhere but heard the familiar sounds of her grunting and moving the earth with her mighty claws. I followed the sound. There she was, just past the glimmering willow, but she wasn't alone, she was with young Tywrick. This felt like the day she found me orphaned by my slain parents who couldn't protect themselves from the brood of evil soldiers who attacked our settlement.

Maddith didn't react to my close approach. I was now the observer. I watched as she groomed the young boy atop his head with her heavy black fork-like tongue. He didn't seem to like it but didn't put up a fight. Instead, he curled up beside her on the forest floor and fell asleep.

Suddenly, her head rose to attention, she began to inhale deeply through her nostrils. Whatever was out there was putting her on edge. She stood all the way up, looked down at the sleeping boy, then carefully picked him up with her front left claw and brought him in to her abdomen. She jumped into the air and took flight. It was amazing seeing the sheer grace of this incredibly intelligent animal as she faded away in the distance. A few seconds later, a group of soldiers, perhaps the ones who destroyed lives, walks up to the very spot she leapt from. One of them spoke,

"Smelt like dragon kind eh! Any fool and his pride kin taste that dreadful smell, eh!"

"What you speak of Welty? You done scart the flying lizard away wit yer own foul stench!"

All the men began to laugh at the one they called Welty. They scoured the site for remnants or clues of Maddith's presence. I noticed Welty was missing his left hand and had a deep scar that started at the top of his bald head. It traveled down the left side of his neck and disappeared underneath his tattered and torn shirt. I've seen this scar before, but this was the last concern of mine. I lazily whined to the doctor within my trance.

"Where did she go doc, where did Maddith go? She's carrying my young self away somewhere."

"Stay calm, you haven't lost her at all. The images you see are there for a reason. You, ultimately control what you see in this world. Wherever you find yourself right now, close your eyes and hold your breath. You will know when it's time to let go. Use this same method to change the scenery any time you feel it's necessary. Do it...Now!"

I followed the instructions. After a few seconds I opened my eyes and resumed breathing. There she was, wickedly beautiful and majestic. She was perched above a deep chasm, on a mountainside with jagged edges, basking in the sun. There was very little flora and fauna to speak of. I was surprised to see that Tywrick was older, maybe ten, maybe twelve. He ran about shirtless and used a homemade tool that resembled a boomerang to gather the fruit of an Olgant tree perched high in the branches. This fruit was the source of Maddith's magical prowess. Once eaten, it provided her with a cloak, and she could no longer be seen. It was the perfect tool to escape man, her only predator. Young Tywrick gathered plenty of the fruit and kept it for her in a gray satchel. The coarse-skinned fruit resembled a pomegranate. It benefited the Hedge Dragon only but was becoming rare as unrighteous men sought the extinction of the trees and burned them to the ground upon locating them.

After Tywrick finished, he threw the satchel across Maddith's neck and mounted her. She spread her wings, leapt off the mountain and soared across the valley. I closed my eyes and held my breath. When I opened them, they were just landing outside a camp at dusk, it was temporary, like a caravan setting up shop for the night. Tywrick dismounted. He crept closer to the camp's edge to get a better view. Concealed by thick inkberry bushes, he used his hands to part an opening. What he saw were soldiers, the evil kind. He seemed to be sizing them up and made angry faces at their presence. He returned to the dragon, opened the satchel and threw two pieces of fruit up towards her mouth. She caught both of them and crunched them down to her belly. Five minutes later she dissolved into the thin air. I heard a whooshing sound and could feel the swift breeze from her taking flight. Tywrick sat on the ground Indian style and began playing a fife that he made himself. Seconds later, fire began to rain down from the sky onto the campsite. She was attacking them, but they could not see where the assault was coming from. Several men wailed as they ran away from the camp covered in flames. Again, a long flash of fire hit them, exploding some of the makeshift housing units they built. More screams and cries for help followed. Young Tywrick continued to play the woodwind as if he was drowning out the sounds of war... Just outside the camp I heard a man shout,

"Over here you ghastly beast! Over here! "

He was waving a white cloth above his head. I watched as flames appeared over the spot the man was shouting. He turned to run before the flames reached the ground and scorched the area.

"I remember what happens next!" I excitedly told the doctor. "It's a trap, how do I stop this?"

"You cannot stop something that has already happened. Remember, you are there to observe and resolve the feelings that follows you into this life. Casey must learn from this, not interact. If what you see is unpleasant, then change it!"

I didn't care for the doctor's response, but I knew he was right. I watched as they captured Maddith using their own magic. She made contact with a neon purple net that appeared in the sky once she touched it. It closed around her, rendering her flightless and crashed her into the ground. The cursed mesh weakened the effects of the fruit, it subdued her. She reappeared within its confines and went lame. I was infuriated at her becoming a spectacle. The pleasant sound of Tywrick's musical distraction stopped. He remained on the edge of the camp and watched as it continued to burn. He was alone and could do nothing to free her from the corrupt men who began to celebrate their capture. This scenery was heartbreaking to watch, so I closed my eyes, for a longer time. I held my breath until I knew I was on the edge of self-suffocating. When I opened them, Tywrick was crouched down right in front of me staring at Castle Dominion behind me. It must have been ten years later. He had grown into a rough looking man, owing his survival to a group of commoners who took him in. During that time, he vowed to one day find the dragon he loved. His hair was jet black and rested on his broad shoulders. His facial hair was scruffy and thick, like a cave man who's never seen a razor. He wore a long black leather tunic with an image of a dragon skillfully carved in the middle of the chest. He hid inside a shallow trench, planning. I then remembered why he was there. I turned to look at the impressively constructed castle and when I blinked, I was instantly transported inside. It was occupied by Lord Aldous Brooker, a tyrant, an unrighteous soul, evil royalty...

"Doc, are you there? I believe this is it! I'm in the castle and believe this is the day that Tywrick has come for her. But something doesn't feel right. Maddith is one of them, her eyes are different, they sparkle with blue flames."

"Perhaps she is under a spell. What else do you see?"

"I see...I see the angry king talking to his subordinates. They are gathered around a large wooden table and pointing at a scroll of some sort. Now that I'm closer I can see it's a map! Yes! a map. Wait! Welty from the forest is here. He's much older now, full of muscles and wears a patch over his left eye. His hand is healed? No, it's been fitted with a mechanical replacement. The scar on his head remains. I don't like the looks of him at all. He's a weak, deceptive coward."

The king and his men were planning something malicious. Maddith suddenly started pacing around the open-air corner of the castle she occupied. She made a low growling noise like a dog on the edge of barking. The men noticed too but stayed focused on their scandalous plans. I left the king's table and walked a few dozen feet closer to where she was. She kept peering up toward the radiant blue sky above her. That's when I saw Tywrick looking over the edge of the opening. She knew he was there and was agitated. She didn't remember him or couldn't. She stood on her hind legs and stretched up towards the opening to get a better whiff, then went back to all fours and laid down. This is when saw two pieces of Olgant fruit hit the castle floor right in front of her. She leaned down to sniff them but wasn't interested. The fruit was just inches from her mouth. Tywrick the savage and I, Casey the observer both waited in daunting anticipation for her next move. I could feel him wanting her to just eat the fruit that her species loves. After several more moments, her tongue came out and moved one of the gourds around as if she was playing with it. This was the break we were hoping for. That tiny taste of fruit was all the encouragement needed for her to become stimulated. She ate both of them. We waited a long five minutes until we saw her eyes flash a bright neon blue, then faded into blood red. Her head began to jerk side to side, checking her surroundings. Her wings unfolded and her face turned to anger as she remembered hating the men in her presence. Tywrick knew the fruit had broken the possession spell, but it did not provide a cloak, she needed more of it. It was time for him to act. He jumped fifty feet from the opening and perfectly landed on the dragons back. The sound of the impact alerted the men. They all turned in the dragon's direction who was taking a very deep breath. Welty saw Tywrick sitting atop Maddith and yelled,

"THE SAVAGE HAS CONTROL OF HER...RUN!"

It was just in time, Maddith filled the hall with fire. She then leapt out the opening of the castle and flew away with Tywrick.

"Doc! I don't remember what happens next! It's like I've run into a roadblock. Tywrick has the dragon, they are escaping the castle!"

"Stay calm and watch them closely" He anxiously replied.

I didn't need to hold my breath this time. A quick, hard blink transported me outside the castle where I saw Tywrick and the dragon making fiery passes on it. Soldiers were slow getting to their post to begin defense. Welty was their commander and ordered the arrows to fly. They bounced off the built-in Armour of Maddith's hardened scales, but Tywrick had taken one in the thigh. He then saw several wooden windows which housed catapults were now drawn. He ordered Maddith to pull back and they began retreating from the castle...

Before they were out of range of the weapons, Tywrick was struck with a large steel arrow intended for the dragon. It was similar to a harpoon. It pierced him in the shoulder, going right though the tunic and his flesh. He was ripped off the dragon from the impact of the heavy weapon. He watched Maddith turn and dive towards him as he plunged toward the earth. The pursuit was a maddening rush of adrenaline. She did not reach him in time, gravity won this race...

Tywrick collided with the rocks below causing his death. The dragon landed beside him. She knew he was gone but tried to nudge him awake anyway. I was shocked to the core of my being.

This is how I died and why the memories stopped here. I closed my eyes and held my breath one more time. When I opened them, Maddith had just buried me. I was the crusader who was her unlikely son, her savior, her friend and her companion. Maddith was heartbroken, you could see it in her face. She stood up on two legs, fully extended her wings and let out a screech into the sky that could be heard for miles. She was grieving. She looked at the grave and took a deep breath. She marked it with a long blast of fire, melting the rock into a concrete slab, protecting it from scavengers and the like. She then grabbed the satchel of fruit with her claws and took to the skies, roaring her way into the night...

"It's over doc... She's gone. Tywrick is gone. He died saving her."

I sat up on the couch, Dr. Thiesen put his hand on my shoulder. I was stunned and couldn't move for a few moments. I used to be Tywrick. I saved the dragon I loved and would give my life for hers again every time. My eyes were still sopping wet from the sorrow of how it all ended. I looked at Dr. Ted, he looked at me, then handed me a piece of paper and said,

"I found this on the internet...My god young man, you were Tywrick!"

I looked down at the sheet of paper. It was printout from the Historical Society archives. I read it:

Tywrick Orodor, born 1328 died 1353, was the only know person to be raised by a dragon. He is commended for destroying the Castle Dominion, occupied by the much-hated Anglican rulers of Ellastry. Legends says that an invisible dragon demolished the castle with unforgiving flames in a short amount of time...

I dropped the paper, looked at the doctor who didn't know how to feel, and broke out in a joyous fit of laughter... Maddith went back to that castle and avenged my death.

Dr. Ted began to smile at me celebrating. After I settled down, he shook my hand like I was some kind of hero. He said I wasn't the first person to ever have a profound past history, but I was the first patient he's met whose past life was confirmed by historic records.

The dreams stopped. The worries and confusions went away. The doc and I stayed in touch. He wanted to take my story live, but I declined. What's the point? My past life was fulfilled, Maddith wanted me to know that I didn't die in vain. This was all that mattered to me. It was time to live life as Casey...