There's something under the boat

Friday 5th March 1993

22:30

I don't know why I agreed to this. I like camping as much as anyone, but my birthday is basically in the winter and I'm freezing. It was snowing last week for god's sake! And now here I am, wearing three jumpers and my waterproofs, freezing my tits off. I should have said no and told my friends to save the partying for next year. Eighteen is an age actually worth celebrating.

Lucy's in charge of the fire, but she brought her sleeping bag out to get comfortable and now she's fallen asleep. The fire itself is on the verge of sleep too, only the smallest of flames left. I'm no good at reigniting fires. I can start one, I can make one so big the flames go higher than the trees, but I can't coax a dying fire into survival. Maybe I should wake Lucy up. No, I'll feel too mean.

Priti, Sanjay, Meg and Isaac went to their tents ten minutes ago. I'm the only one awake. Well, Julian's up, but he buggered off into the trees with his torch ages ago to see if he could find any other campers to scare. I didn't want to invite him, but Isaac has had a crush on him forever, and who am I to stand in the way of true love? So it's just me now, writing away to give myself something to do. My fingers are going numb though. I might go for a walk.

23:00

I'd just put my notebook away when Julian returned. He was laughing and holding a large branch which, I imagine, had a silhouette resembling a huge claw if you were inside a tent. Apparently he'd managed to terrify a group of 12-year-olds who had set up their tents twenty feet away from their parents to feel more grown up and independent. They'll probably have nightmares for weeks.

His cackling woke up the rest of the group and arguments began. I can't handle arguments. I'm sure a therapist would unveil some deep, psychological issue to do with my fear of rejection and confrontation, but honestly I just hate the noise. So I left.

I had the good sense to grab my sleeping bag before I slipped away. I don't think anyone even noticed. Good. Now I'm comfortably wrapped up under a willow next to the lake. Even at night the sight is breath-taking. It's not just the calming ripples of the water or the bright full moon. This far from the city, the sky is alive with stars which are mirrored in the lake surface. I feel like I'm surrounded by night time. It's so peaceful.

23:15

I might be about to do something reckless. I was adjusting my position and getting comfortable when I noticed something through the trees. A dock. Well, a dock makes it sound like it's fit for purpose, but there are wide gaps between the wooden planks and there's nowhere to rope a boat. Yet there is a boat. A tiny, mouldy rowboat with mismatched oars. I ummed and aahed about going near the boat for a good five minutes, but now I'm sitting inside. It's damp, and I feel like a strong breeze could tip me into the water, but the feeling of floating is so calming. Besides, how much trouble can I possibly get in just sitting on a boat by a dock? Of course, this is where the recklessness comes in. I'm tempted to take it out. Right into the middle of the lake. It's only a matter of time before someone comes looking for me, and to be honest I'm not in the mood to hear who insulted who, and who's threatening to leave. If I row away from the shore, it'll just be me and the water. Hmmm...

Saturday 6th March 1993

0:05

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

I'm not actually excited about my birthday. The only good thing about turning seventeen is being able to learn how to drive. But I AM excited that I'm now in the middle of the lake. I can only see the shore if I squint, and really that's because the trees are gigantic. I was right about it being peaceful. With no birds in the sky, the water creatures sleeping beneath me, the only sound is the gentle lapping of water against the boat. I'm in heaven.

It took a while to get here. The oars were a nightmare to use in the shallows. Plus I couldn't bear the feeling of the damp wood on my palms so I pulled my sleeves over my hands, making my grip much more slippery. But it's totally worth it. Although I'm glad I brought my sleeping bag with me. There was hardly any wind on the shore but out in the open water the breeze rocks me. It's gentle, but chilly. I figure if I get in my sleeping bag and lie down, it'll feel like I'm in a cradle, with the stars as my mobile. Pure bliss.

0:42

Something weird just happened. Well, I think. I could have imagined it. I was half asleep and a wave swept the boat about twenty feet away from where I'd stopped. Even though there was no more wind. Nothing to cause the wave. I've looked around to see if there are any ripples, if a bird had landed on the water or a fish had done some kind of flip. The water is still. Weirdly still. Almost like I'm not even here. This is going to seem ridiculous but it was almost like...something pushed the boat.

Ha! I've just read that back and almost capsized from laughing. I'm being stupid. Nevertheless, I might head back to shore. No sense in freaking myself out.

0:46

The left oar is gone. Vanished. Not just that it's fallen out of the boat. There was no splash, no scraping of wood against wood. It's not floating and there are still no ripples. I can feel panic creeping up on me so I'm writing in here to help myself calm down. Relax, Liv. I still have the other oar. It'll take longer to get back but not impossible.

1:00

Bloody hell this is slow. I've barely moved. I needed to take a break because my arms are exhausted but I need to get going ASAP. It was so calming when I first got out here but something's changed. There's hardly any wind but the water is getting rough. The sky is clear and the moon is full, yet it feels weirdly dark. I'm glad I brought my notebook with me, it's the only thing keeping me sane right now.

1:15

My hands are frozen. I had to stop using my sleeves to hold the oar because it was too difficult to keep swapping sides, and my fingers are numb. I can barely write, but if I don’t, I will have a panic attack. What is going on out here? Something doesn't feel right.

1:18

Oh shit oh shit oh shit. The second oar has disappeared. I swear I put it in the oar holder and made sure it was secure. I put my notebook back in my bag, turned around and it was gone. How the hell am I supposed to get back now!? If I use my hands I'll get frostbite. If I use my notebook it'll be ruined. I'll look in my bag. There's got to be something I can use!

1:20

A ruler. That's it. Bloody hell.

1:35

I am freaking out. I put the ruler too far into the water and something scratched my hand. I screamed so loud it hurt my throat and then dropped the ruler in the water. It wasn't a plant. It wasn't a fish. It was something sharp. And it was on purpose. There's something in the water. I think I'm going to be sick.

1:40

Ok, breathe. New plan made. It's probably about five hours until sunrise. I've got my sleeping bag. I was comfortable before. I'm going to lie down on the bottom of the boat, pull the sleeping bag over my head and wait this out. I've got my notebook, I've got my torch, I've got a bottle of water. I'll be fine. By morning someone will have realised I'm missing and get help. There's no reason I can't snuggle up and let the, admittedly now much stronger, rocking soothe me. Besides, it'll keep me safe from whatever it was that scratched me. I'm sure it was just some kind of underwater creature.

2:00

it's hard to relax with all this movement. i don't understand where these waves are coming from. The wind is hardly blowing.

2:05

FUCK ive just had the shit scared out of me by a horrifying sound. somewhere between a shriek and a growl. definitely not something ive ever heard before. can't bring myself to get out of my sleeping bag and look. whatever it was, didn't sound like a herbivoɍ ɇ~~

2:15

something banged against the boat as i was writing the last entry oh my god something has literally just smacked into the side and almost capsized oh shit oh fuck i dont know what to do im freaking out what the fuck am i supposed to do

2:45

No more movement. Maybe it was just a large fish swimming past. I am working myself up for no reason.

2:55

When will this nightmare end?

3:05

i heard the noise again. it might just be my imagination but i think its getting closer

3:15

BANG

3:17

BANG!

3:22

BANG!!!

3:25

THERES NO WAY ITS JUST A FISH THERE IS SOMETHING UNDER THE B