The One Who Survived...

April 15, 1912

2:45am

The sea all around us was dark. The only light coming from the tiny flashlight I had just shoved into my pocket before everything occurred. Faint screams were sounded from where the ship that couldn't sink once stayed afloat. The passengers on our lifeboat kept telling the crew member to go back and rescue those screaming and splashing around in the water, but he kept telling us how his priority was our safety. No amount of begging and pleading could get this guy to change his mind; if you ask me, I'm pretty sure he just wanted to save himself.

"Those people in the water don't care about any of you," He would tell us, "The second we float our way back over to them, they'll tip us over and try to raid this lifeboat." Boy, did that outrage everyone on board.

Wives cried for their husbands. Mothers cried for their sons. Me? I couldn't find the tears that wanted to come out. My mind couldn't even find a way to process what just happened. One second, I was eating dinner with my father and brother; discussing what we would do once we reached the new world. The next, we were all sprinting up to the top deck to try and get a lifeboat before they all filled up.

"Women and children board first; men you will get your chance after all the women and children go onboard."

With my brother staying behind, my father began pushing me towards the lifeboat.

"Dad! No!" I remember screaming out.

"Don't worry, Tabs. We'll meet up with you once we all get rescued. I promise."

"Come with me." I remember pleading out.

Without saying another word, my father squeezed me tight. My brother stood in the back with a smile plastered across his face as he mouthed the words 'I love you'. My father began helping the crew member get me onto the boat.

"No." Tears filled my waterline but none wanted to come out, "Dad, don't let me go without you."

"I love you, Tabs. Johnny and I both love you so much." A tear slipped down his cheek.

"Dad!" I begged for him, but he took a step back and just let the crew members begin to lower the lifeboat. "Dad! Don't you dare-" I went to scream out, but he had faded back into the crowd.

Once the little lifeboat crashed into the water was when I realized just how far the ship was sinking. The boat had already started to tip, with half of it already almost completely submerged in water. Other passengers had already started to jump out the ship into the ocean; God, I can't even imagine how cold that must've been... it was freezing for me, and I was on a boat above the water. Some of the jumping passengers didn't even have life jackets on. Did my dad or brother have a life jacket on? I didn't. We didn't get to one in time before dad began rushing us up to the decks.

Once we had been paddled far from the ship, the crew member with us stopped and just sat on the water. I never could understand why he would stop here of all places. Maybe his arms were tired of paddling? We were far enough away to be away from the ship's danger zone, yet not far enough away to hear what looked like little bitty ants to us screaming as they smacked the water below. There were a lot of moving going on in the water around the ship; people swimming, people splashing around, or people trying to grab ahold of those who were wearing life jackets.

Suddenly the boat began to crack right down the middle as all the lights of the ship began to shut off instantaneously, causing one of the cylinders to fall onto an entire sea of people who had thought they made a break from the sinking ship; while the other half that didn't immediately plummet into the ocean started to slowly move upwards, straight towards the sky. I couldn't watch, but for some odd reason... I couldn't turn away. All those people. Those mothers. Children. My father and brother. Oh God, did they make it out of the ship? What if they were one of those people splashing around in the waters? As the side started going up, more and more people began falling into the waters. Once the ship had become completely vertical, it immediately went straight down.

Women around me began to weep. Children turned to their mothers to question about their mothers about where their fathers were. My mind went blank. My father promised that we'd see each other again. He promised that we'll get rescued and reunite once again.

The sea all around us was dark. The only light coming from the tiny flashlight I had shoved into my pocket just before everything occurred. Faint screams came from the space where the ship that couldn't sink had once stayed afloat. Mothers and wives all around me were weeping and crying out for their husbands and fathers to their children. Women began begging for the crew member to go back as he declined over and over. Me? I was frozen. Unable to move. Unable to breathe. Unable to imagine a life where I had to keep going on without the two men closest to me. Unable to imagine a life where I couldn't hear my brother's voice or be wrapped in my father's embrace.

'I love you, Tabs. Johnny and I love you so much.'

I felt like screaming, but no words came out. I felt like diving into the water and finding my family myself, but I know that's not what they would've wanted.

He wanted me to have this. They wanted me to be in this situation. God, I just hope they aren't suffering right now.

I love you, dad. I love you, Johnny. I'll see you guys both again soon. I promise.