The Last Donn-a

What if Taylor Swift was a gangster?!

I know, I know what you’re thinking. I’m crazy and this woman is one most successful artists of her generation. TRUE.

And on top of that, the woman is drop dead gorgeous and seems to be as sweet as a Georgia peach which is also true and hear comes the proverbial but.

But what if she had like a mean streak in her that nobody talks about?

Like Joe Pesci in Goodfellas. “Do I amuse you! Do I make you laugh, Henry!”

In this day and time, there are really no more moguls in Hollywood which in itself is a dying business.

The shotcallers and the powerbrokers of the entertainment business when it was in its heyday, are just as extinct as Tyrannasaurus Rex and the rest of his crew are these days.

Well, there’s still one last outlaw out there roaming and her name is Taylor Swift.

\Think about it for a minute. Swift is singlehandedly keeping the record industry in business.

Without her, they would be Enron’d. Every time T-Swizzle drops an album, she demolishes the charts.

Nobody else is really doing that anymore. You can mention Adele but she doesn’t have the hunger and the drive of a Taylor Swift.

T-Swizzle is the music industry’s only saving grace.

Just take a good, long look at how she handles business. Remember when she had someone on her crew that went behind her back and brought up her entire musical catalog.

I bet you that cat can’t even find work anymore. The reason why is because Swift “put the papers out on him” and now the poor lad can’t even sell Girl Scout Cookies without Swift’s permission.

You don’t cross the boss and I ain’t talking about Bruce Springsteen either.

Obviously, Swift would be pissed off by that betrayal but she didn’t let that stop her.

The young lady has been re-recording her music for the past few years and better after she kicked that imbecile off her team.

Let me tell you this, homie better be careful though.

He might wake up one day in bed and find an America-A Horse With No Name vinyl LP laying right next to him in his bed when he wakes up one morning.

Outside of that, you never really hear about anybody trying to mess with Ms. Swift. She’s like the person you go to when you have a problem that needs to be solved.

Imagine walking into a room and you see her sitting there in a chair rocking a grey fedora tipped to the side as crosses those long legs that look like they stretch from here to eternity.

She will solve your problems and make you an offer that you just can’t refuse.

She has like this aura about her and she’s a tall, drink of water too. I think she’s around 6 feet tall.

I heard that she broke up with her boyfriend not too long ago.

I think the main reason why she can’t keep a man is because she keeps beating them at basketball.

Word through the grapevine is that Swift has one heck of a post game. Neither Hakeem or McHale have anything on that woman down on the low block.

Your boyfriends are just not going to tolerate being constantly bludgeoned into submission on the hardwood.

I read a Yahoo article today on how “distraught her ex was aftter she moved on so quicklly.”

I guess she wanted better competition that he just couldn’t offer her. I can see her screaming out WHO GOT NEXT! right after she finished spanking him after a game of 21.

Smh. T, you can’t just be dunking on your boyfriends like that.

Especially that Macauley Culkin looking dude she was with recently. Don’t be surprised if she starts dating Devin Booker next. He might be the only guy that she can’t post up.

Disclaimer: This article is strictly for entertainment purposes. There is not one ounce of truth in it so please dont sue me, sis @Taylor.