THE KID WITH THE BLIND EYE

A cry for help is what she heard as she walked her pregnant, bruised body to the hospital; a woman's son was just killed in broad daylight. Some people just stopped and stared while others drove past in their nice cars playing loud music with no remorse for the crime that just took place. It was as if they didn't even see it. This was a typical day for the beginning of summer in Spanish Harlem. The pregnant woman arrives at the hospital barely able to speak; after walking four blocks to the nearest emergency room, she says to the receptionist I would like to check myself in. Without looking at the pregnant woman, the receptionist yells, "NAME?" The pregnant woman replies, "my name is Melissa." The receptionist didn't bother to ask her why she was there. The receptionist must've assumed that the pregnant woman seven months along was there for pregnancy complications.

Melissa was there because she was a recovering drug addict and her mother kicked her out because she found a glass pipe in her laundry. Not only did Melissa need a place to stay, but she needed somewhere she could get clean and remain clean for her baby boy, who was due to be delivered within a few months. Melissa knew that if she didn't clean up her act, she would be a no-shit mom, but half of the time, she was too high to care. As she got settled in her room and started to get a sense of relaxation, the nurse came in to do a routine check-up and bloodwork. Melissa allowed them to do so; although that wasn't why she was in the hospital, she knew that they were following protocol. As the nurse leaves, Melissa says, "finally, I can sleep." A few hours go by, and the doctor comes in to speak to Mellisa. He tells her, "there's no fun way to say this, so I'm going to just say it." The blood test we ran came back, showing us you have an infection in your blood, and if we do not deliver this baby now, you and he can die. Melissa instantly started to regret some of the decisions she had been making and wondered if it was her fault, but there was no time to sit and wallow about what could happen to her child; the baby was coming, and he was coming soon.

The doctors weren't sure if Melissa was strong and healthy enough to give birth naturally and highly suggested she give birth through a cesarean delivery. Melissa didn't mind she had done so much damage to her body from all the drugs she figured another scar no one could see would hurt.

It was 6/23/1985 at 12:23 AM Melissa had given birth to her first child, a beautiful child, although you can see from the start he was very much unique and special. She named him Jahronomo because nothing could explain the excitement and happiness that she felt at that moment. Jahronomo had one brown eye and one blue eye at birth. His mother thought it must've been passed down from her mother's mom, who was French and came to the united states in the 1940s because she fell in love with an American marine named Justin Blackford or Black Just, which was his nickname in the military. They named him that because he was 6 ft 7 and so black you couldn't see him at night when it was time for battle. As Melissa took some pain medicine, the doctors came in to get her permission to run some tests on Jahronomo. They were worried about his one blue eye and just wanted to make sure that everything was okay.

All Melissa wanted to do was rest and hold her new baby boy, but it felt like she was interrupted every time she got the chance to. The doctors came back with the results on Jahronomo and let Melissa know that her newborn baby may possibly be blind, and they would encourage her to continue to take him to get his eye tested as he got older. Melissa balled into tears as soon as the doctors left the room. At that moment, her actions to constantly do drugs caught up to her, and she felt as though it was her fault Jahronomo's eye was potentially messed up. But she vowed to be the best mother she could be for him and swore not to leave that hospital until she was clean and capable of staying clean. A few weeks went by, Jahronomo's hair started to grow, and Melissa was just in love with her boy. She had moments where she would stare at him for hours. After all the bad things she did in her life, she couldn't believe that the Lord would bless her with something so innocent and pure. Melissa knew that if this were any other moment in her life before 1985, her chances of being the best mother she could be would be slim to none.

She would smoke crack sometimes to get her day started, and when she couldn't get high because she didn't have any money and her dealer Alonzo wouldn't front her any drugs, she would go to her aunt's house. Her aunt was a hippie in the 1960s but had become a worldly woman who seemed very accomplished. She only smoked weed and took some LSD every once in a while to feel good. Melissa would go over there to get high with her and hear her talk about the old days and what it was like being free and vibrating on a different frequency. Melissa knew no matter what, she couldn't be that person anymore, so the first thing she did when she got out of the hospital was applied for a job in a bakery over by Sugar Hill. It was a different part of the town with more classy people and working people.

Melissa grew up in El Barrio, and most of the guys over there would try to hit on her or get high with her, and she knew that environment wasn't the best place to raise Jahronomo. Plus, she had heard the rumors going around that people were saying her child was the son of Bonobo's who had made a lot of enemies, and if people knew about that, they would possibly try to harm her and Jahronomo. After working three weeks at the bakery, she found an apartment on the hill. At first, all she had was a bedroom set and a crib for Jahronomo. She knew that if she asked Bonobo for money, he would get them everything they needed, but Melissa didn't want to risk it, so she waited until her next paycheck to buy some other things they needed for around the house.

One day Melissa was leaving her mother's house on the Eastside, and she heard someone yell, "AYO, Melissa, wait up, I got to talk to you." It was Bonobo being loud and obnoxious as always. That was the biggest thing that she hated about him, the way he felt like he always needed to be the center of attention. Bonobo had not seen Melissa since she had the baby, and he asked her if he was the father. She told him, no, knowing that the truth would only complicate things for her, her new job, and her new place. Bonobo rushed off because he saw someone that owed him money. Melissa felt guilty that she had lied; Melissa couldn't see that dream life she wanted with Bonobo. She knew it was only a matter of time until he was either murdered or sent to jail for life. A few years go by, and Bonobo leaves Harlem for good after his friend Alonzo gets killed. Melissa never got the chance to tell Bonobo the truth. Before his friend got killed, Bonobo went in and out of town to Cleveland.

The word around the town was Bonobo had something to do with his best friend being killed, and that's why he left. Everyone all over Harlem loved Alonzo; he was like the golden child for making money; he never wore the same outfit twice and was known for taking outstanding care of his siblings. No one understood why Bonobo would kill someone he loved or even why he would kill someone that loved him. Melissa was relieved that the rumors about Jahronomo being Bonobo's son started to die down. Alonzo's murder was too close to home, and it didn't matter what side of Harlem she was on; if they knew that boy was Bonobo's child, they both were pretty much as good as dead.

Jahronomo is about eight years old now. He was a very charismatic boy; despite being blind in one eye, his friends thought it was cool he had one brown eye and one blue eye. Melissa was doing the best she could with him going to work and remaining clean for the eight years of Jahronomos life, although she constantly got the urge to go back to her old ways, every time she looked at his eyes, it humbled her and kept her on her path. Jahronomo came home one day and asked Melissa, "What's A Lookout?" Jahronomo had heard some older guys say that to him when he was on his way home from the bodega with his friends; they yelled to him, "Wassup, Baby Lookout." It was a name they called him because of his condition. People were always doing that around Harlem giving people nicknames based upon how they looked or things they've done. Even his father got the nickname Bonobo because he was always with many women, as though he couldn't fight the urge like a Bonobo ape. Melissa told Jahronomo, "don't speak to those guys; they're no good, and also, you know, not to talk to strangers anyway." Now and then, Jahronomo would see those guys again around the bodega, and every time they saw him, they showed him, love, even sometimes giving him money to clean the inside of their cars. One of the guys Maine loved Baby Lookout; he constantly bought him sneakers and put a few hundred dollars in his pocket to help his mother out around the house. Jahronomo knew not to tell his mother about them looking out for him from time to time because he knew she would punish him and most likely embarrass him in front of the older guys.

By the time Jahronomo was 14, he had become a regular around the bodega; he had earned the name Lookout; the baby part was gone because he was fully involved in some of the activities that took place in front of the store. Melissa was working two jobs at this point. The apartment in sugar hill was becoming too much for her to take on, on her own. She would think to herself every once in a while how good of a position she would be in if she told Bonobo the truth that time back in the day. Still, it was too late now to even reconsider Bonobo had gone to Cleveland and got himself in more trouble than he could've ever imagined. While out in Cleveland, Bonobo committed 16 murders and got arrested about a year after Alonzo was killed. While arrested, Bonobo had become an informant against one of his enforcers that he had in Cleveland Bonobo snitched to be able to see the light of day again. Although he didn't snitch on anyone from home, he did admit to a few murders in the other boroughs and the murder of his close friend Alonzo whom Bonobo had killed because he lied to him about making money on the side. Bonobo and the rest of his guys had rules, those rules were not to be broken, and although Bonobo went on to break those rules as well, at the time, he felt like murdering Alonzo was the best move because he kept lying to him about it. Melissa couldn't believe the stories she heard about Bonobo; he had gone to Cleveland and become a worst serial killer than the son of sam. Meanwhile, her son Jahronomo was becoming a part of a lifestyle that she would frown upon; he kept an eye out when his friends would break into people's houses. He was perfect for the job; no one would ever suspect him of being on the Lookout because he was blind.

One day Jahronomo had come home to Melissa crying at the kitchen table, stressed about the bills. He asked her, "what’s wrong?" she replied, "we might have to move back in with your grandmother in El Barrio" in a state of disappointment, Jahronomo yelled, "Nah, we're not going anywhere." He ran to his room to go into his shoebox and gave his mother five thousand dollars. Melissa questioned where he had got that money, and he replied, "working at the bodega." Melissa knew he was lying, so she said, "boy, you are 14 and a half years old; you're not making this type of money working at the bodega; what's going on, and don't lie to me again." Jahronomo didn't want to be a snitch; he had heard everyone around town talking about how Bonobo was a snitch and how disappointed they were that he told. Jahronomo says to his mother, "Nah, I'm not going out like Bonobo." In utter shock, Melissa instantly knew what her son was involved in. At that point, there was nothing she could even do to stop him. He had become addicted to the worst drug known to man, MAKING MONEY. He was a good ole hustling junkie, just like his father was at 14 years old. Although he didn't know it was a part of his DNA, it just felt like something he was good at. He couldn't play sports like the other kids because of his eye, so he found the next best thing for a young minority to do in Harlem at the time. It was either sports, drugs, or entertainment, and his path was chosen for him the minute Melissa chose to have a baby by Bonobo.

There was no way Melissa would lose her son to the streets. She figured she would have to come up with a plan to get her son out of Harlem. She would call out of work to make sure he didn't leave the house; she would talk to him for hours about his poor choices. "Cant, you see," Melissa uttered. "You can't see that they're just using you because you're a kid, and the Police aren't going to search a kid." Jahronomo knew she was talking nonsense because he had been pat-down by the cops many times before. But he sarcastically says to his mother, "No, mom, I cant see; I'm literally blind in one eye." She said, "Son if you don't leave these streets alone, you're going to end up like your father." Melissa had never mentioned Jahronomos father before, so he asked her what she meant by that. She replied, "your father is doing life in prison right now as a result of him doing the same things you're doing right now." Jahronomo asked what his name was; she said, "Bonobo is your father," hoping it would scare him straight instead; it disappointed him and made Jahronomo runoff.

Melissa was worried about who he would tell this new information to, so she looked for him. The only person Jahronomo felt like he could trust with that information was his street tutor Maine. Maine had taught Jahronomo everything he knew about the streets and treated him like his son. Jahronomo ran in a hurry to tell Maine. When he gets to him, all sweaty and out of breath, he says, "yo, I have to talk to you about something." Maine utters back, "what's good, Lookout? talk to me," Jahronomo replied. "I just found out who my dad was." Maine uttered, "who?" "Bonobo," Jahronomo replies, hearing a loud outburst replying, "BONOBO" "Are you sure, Lookout?" Jahronomo says, "yes, my mother just told me." Maine tells him, "don't tell anyone else what you just told me." Jahronomo loved Maine, so he would do anything he said. Melissa is anxious and scared something will happen to her son if the wrong people find out this information.

Melissa walked around Sugar hill looking for Jahronomo with him nowhere in sight; she even went to the bodega, still no luck finding him. Jahronomo had gone to this girl's house, who he would see now and then around the bodega. This night was a special one because this was the night she promised him they would have intercourse. Jahronomo was a virgin and heard all the guys say around the way say, "you're not a man until you get your first piece of cake." The girl's name was Lonnie her mother wasn't home, and her father was killed some years back. Lonnie was raising herself because her mother was always working. She asked Jahronomo if he had a condom; he told her “no;” she went into her mother's room and stole one.

Jahronomo was impressed with himself, being that it was his first time, but he couldn't get what his mother told him about his father off of his mind. Lonnie asked him what was wrong; forgetting what Maine had told him, he told Lonnie everything. Lonnie also had heard her mother speak about someone named Bonobo before, so when Jahronomo left, she went to see her uncle Luis and asked him if he knew someone named Bonobo. He told her, "yeah, that fucking rat murdering bastard murdered your father, Alonzo." Jahronomo headed to the bodega to tell all the guys how he was now a man, but he heard Lonnie call his name before he could get there. She says, "come with me, I want to take you somewhere;" she took him to the same spot her father was killed. She asked him, "do you know what happened here?" he replied, "no, what?" Lonnie says, "My father was killed in this same spot."

It starts to rain as Jahronomo asks her, "by who" he gets something into his eye with his vision now blurry, Lonnie says with tears on her face, "Bonobo," and Just as Jahronomo starts to get his vision clear, two shots go off into the back of his head. Lonnie's uncle runs off with a sense of redemption. Melissa couldn't find Jahronomo anywhere in Sugar Hill, so she went to the Eastside and looked around El Barrio. At first, there were no signs of him anywhere, but at one right turn, she saw a crowd of people along with an ambulance and figured she should take a look as she walked up to the crime scene, she saw a body there covered and heard someone who had been there the whole time saying, "yo did you know that was Bonobos son, whoever did this better hope he never gets out." Melissa, now feeling uneasy, goes to check and see if it was her boy, and it is. She burst out into a screaming cry, and as she does, the cops try to get her off the victim, but before they can pull her off her lifeless child, she says, "CAN'T YOU SEE?"

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