The Insurance Comes Out at One O'Clock

Karen sat sipping her morning coffee thankful that it was Saturday. It had been an awful week. Really, it had been an awful month. She had been physcially threatened at work on 3 occasions, each time by a disgruntled patient. It was par for the course for a psychiatric nurse, but it didn't make it any less unsettling. Her car was broken into the week before and to make matters worse, she lost her favourite ring.

She looked everywhere for the stupid thing. She had taken it off a few days before and placed it on top of her jewelry box, intending to take it to the jewelers to have a stone replaced. It was a cheap little ring, 10 carat gold with 3 synthetic stones, blue sapphires on either side with a white diamond in the middle, the kind you'd get in the Sears catalogue back in 1986. But it meant more to her than all the expensive pieces she'd collected over the years combined. Her husband, and high school sweetheart, Bryan gave her that ring, a sort of promise ring, on Christmas day, 1986. They were both 15, crazy in love and determined to conquer the world together.

She asked Bryan if he'd seen it. She'd asked the kids. No one saw it. It just "disappeared". She began to wonder if someone had gotten into the house and took it. Someone had gotten into her car, why not her house? But why would they? What kind of a thief would walk by thousands of doallrs of expensive jewelry and electronics, and a change jar, and take a cheap old ring with a fake blue stone missing. Even thinking about it, in connection with everything else, gave her the creeps.

Karen looked out the window, uneasy. Everything felt "off" like her foundation had been ripped from under her. She didn't like that feeling. She gave her head a stern shake and willed herself back to sense. "Stop being silly," she scolded herself, after all, none of these things were connected.

Her self-steadying motivational talk was interrupted by the doorbell. She opened the door to a stout, smiling delivery man, "package for K. Parker?" he said, asking, not telling her.

She nodded, accepting the box. It was about the size of a cereal box, wrapped in plain brown paper. She turned it over, examining it closely. There was no return address, only a stamp that said "Springdale". That told her nothing but that it came from somewhere in town.

She shook the box. It was light. Very light, as if it contained nothing but air. She opened it. It was a cereal box, Corn Pops, to be exact. There was nothing inside but a plain white sheet of paper with something scribbled on it in red ink:

THE INSURANCE COMES OUT AT 1:00

She threw the paper down, terror suddenly filling her soul. What insurance? What about 1:00? What kind of sick freak...? She bent down and picked it up again, closely examining the writing for some sign of familiarity. Nothing. Her stomach lurched violently into her throat, cutting off her air as she trembled, frantically looking all around for someone, anyone, to come to her aid. Ther was no one, the kids were all out and Bryan was spending a few hours at the office. She eventually wiped the tears from her face and gained enough composure to call the police. Someone was out for her, she was sure of it. Enough was enough!

The half hour wait for an officer to arrive seemed like the longest of her life and when he did arrive, he didn't seem to take her seriously. He was young, too young, she thought. He smirked the entire time, as if her genuine fear amused him. He didn't event take fingerprints! All he did was take a report and promise extra patrols on the street. She reminded him that there had been several cases of cars being broken into and petty vandalism in the neighbourhood lately and that as taxpayers, these concerns should be taken seriously.

Karen called Bryan. No answer. She left a garbled message about the box and insurance, begging him to come home. She walked around the house locking all the doors and windows and tried to settle herself with little tasks around the home. She did the few dishes that were in the sink, put in some laundry, looked over the sale flyers, all the while keeping a close eye on the doors and windows.

She had settled reasonably well in the living room with her laptop when she heard a slight rustling at the back door. She jumped up, alarmed. Bryan called out to her, "Karen, hey Karen, come here."

She stomped out to the kitchen, "you scared the living shit outta me!" she scolded, "didn't you get my message? I'm over here terrified outta my mind and you come in here hollering..."

Bryan looked down at his panicked wife, his eyes sparkling. She was always a spitfire and so cute when she was mad. "Here," he handed her a tiny box, "happy anniversary!"

Karen stared at him for a moment, stunned, then embarrassed, she had completely forgotten about their anniversary. She took the box and opened it. It was her ring, polished, with a brand new stone. Actually, it looked like all 3 stones were new.

"I took the ring," he admitted, "I couldn't tell you. I wanted it to be a surprise, I got the fake stones replaced with real ones. I hope you like it. I figured, we've been married 25 years, you should have something really nice."

She softened instantly as she put the ring on her finger. She began to cry, "of course I love it," she said breathlessly."

Bryan stepped toward her. I'm sorry I scared you," he began, "I thought it would be funny..."

Karen stepped back. "What?" she demanded, "what would be funny?"

The package," he said, surprised she didn't understand, "the note. Don't you remember? When I gave you that ring, it was Christmas, we were eating Corn Pops and I told you that ring was your insurance that I would never ever hurt you." He chuckled at the cleverness of his joke, "insurance, comes out....I got home at 1:00?"

Rage began to fill Karen's belly. What did he want, a parade? She forced it down, she had to. Bryan did a stupid thing, an incredibly stupid thing, but she wasn't about to ruin their anniversay over it. She was tempted, mighty tempted, but she was an adult, even if, in this moment, he wasn't. "You know the cops are looking for you, right?"

"You didn't..." he looked at her quizzically.

"Of course I did," she said, "I get a weird box with no retrun address, telling me some sort of "insurance" is coming out, after everything else...Yes, called the cops!"

Bryan laughed uproariously at his wife, "I'm sorry," he made a pouty face, knowing she couldn't stay angry with him.

She stepped toward him, wrapped her arms around him and looked up at his silly, smiling face, "you ever pull anything like this again, I'll seriously strangle you," she warned, "happy anniversay."