SOUTHERN ICE

Here I sit. A southern girl born in the south. Never having seen a snow storm. Never having experienced freezing temperatures. Never having ice skated. Never having thrown a snowball. Never having fallen on my ass as I walked a slippery sidewalk. Yet I'm having these recurring dreams about an icy frozen pond. I'm not skating, or ice fishing or doing anything at this pond. It 's just a big old frozen pond. Something you'd see before they go to the next scene where Jason is killing you.

I've never thought much about snow, ice or cold to any extent until these dreams started coming. And they keep coming. The only thing I can conclude from these dreams is that I don't think I'm a "SNOW" person. Snow itself is beautiful from what I've seen in pics, but I don't want all the trouble that accompanies snow. Sure the outfits are cute, but shivering as you freeze in said outfit, is not. I know many "snow" people would wonder how I could denounce snow without having experienced it, but some things you just know about yourself. I KNOW I DON'T LIKE BEING COLD!

I come from a climate where people are outside in shorts and flip-flops on Christmas day so these frozen pond dreams are really confusing me. We get an occasional cold day here in Florida and sometimes we'll get a few days of extra chilly for several days in a row, but frozen pond cold is just not a part of our weather. Many here don't even own a coat. Real cold, like they get in Detroit or Wyoming with foot after foot of mounted snow. NO! Many people come to our climate to get away from the lovely, white flakes.

What's that song? "It Never Rains in Southern California." Well. "It Never Snows in most of Florida and if it does, you're literally back in flip-flops in a couple days. I'm having these vivid dreams about a frozen pond. What can that possibly be about? Who does that? Who has dreams about possibly freezing to death. I know...Dramatic! But if I haven't made it crystal yet, I DON'T LIKE BEING COLD! Not even a little bit.

So my first shot at trying to solve this enigmatic issue was to Google "dreams about frozen ponds." I go to a dream site and I start the search with the words "Frozen ponds." Originally "No Results" displayed on the screen. So I next searched "Frozen," and with that, this attack on my personage begins. According to the "Dream People," I'm feeling suppressed, I'm feeling rejected or being denied something, I have "undeveloped emotions," I'm cold or bitter, I project coldness towards another or visa versa. "Okay, we're done here with frozen...let's move on."

My next inquiry was the word "Icy." Let's see, I'm lacking flow of ideas, taking unnecessary risks, I'm emotional. Who the hell are they calling emotional. They don't know me. Aren't most people "emotional?" Okay, Breathe! This dream analysis crap from the "DREAM EXPERTS" isn't going well at all. I knew there was a reason I didn't like the cold. It's being validated by these "interpretations."

Okay, then I go to just "Ponds." My Google inquiry for ponds read tranquility..., alright, now it's getting better. I need quiet time, I keep my feelings contained. Okay, I'm doing better because it got better. Just below on the screen I spotted "Melting ice" which meant warming up. Opening up.

After reading the first two predictions, these two, I'm thinking, "not so bad." I'm feeling a little better about these seemingly personal dream interpretations. You know as humans, sometimes our minds allow us to block out the negative things we've heard and focus on the positive. These last two perceptions of Ponds and Melting Ice, even though a stretch, I found to have some positive feedback in them.

My focus had been pleasantly satisfied about these frozen dreams until I dropped down a few lines and saw the very words I came to the sight to search. Pond wasn't so bad, so how bad could a frozen pond be? "Frozen Pond" was the category. The next word was implies, which for some reason, touched a nerve. "Implies emotionally frigid," it said. I immediately threw my hands in the air. "Here we go," I spouted. I read on...Doesn't express feelings effectively. Indifferent to situations or relationships, will give the cold shoulder."

Remember how I said, "as humans our minds...focus on the positive.?" Well that same theory works with negative stuff, except with negative, it usually sticks in our brains. Emotionally Frigid! Really! Not good at expressing feelings! Huh! Suppressed! Lacking...! I could only register the negative words from all the different searches right now. Wow! Did they consult my Ex on this? Did he somehow know I was going to Google this one day? Emotionally frigid! Reeeeally!!! Dang...only Elsa, Anna or Olaf could live in those temperatures and still be happy. I'd be more like Prince Hans if I were freezing my buns off all day long.

"Okay...Okay." Let's assess this. We've learned that I'm a cold-hating southern girl whose having dreams about frozen ponds and whom dream makers think is a frigid crazy bitch. So where do I go from here? Yeah, that was a little dramatic but the bottom line is I'm having these crazy dreams about this frozen pond and I'm not sure if I should be concerned about it. The fact that I'm giving it this much thought is a concern.

I'm somewhat in a trance by what I've learned about my dreams. And that "Frigid Bitch" thing just wasn't necessary. Oh...my bad...they said emotionally frigid. Well anyway, I'm taking it kind of personally when my phone rings. I pick up the phone and it's my best friend. She knows about my dreams and how they've been bothering me, so she's not surprised that I've Googled them. She is a little surprised that I've built a whole story around the "interpretations."

"Girl...you need to get out," she says. I told her that I didn't feel like going out, but she insisted that I get out of the house. "You're doing too much," she told me. After some back and forth and some reminders from her about the interpretations, I decided to take her up on her offer. Especially when she said, "It's on me."

She had told me she felt like eating classy tonight, so I took that as a invitation to put on some of my finest garb. I can't be but so frigid if I have a friend that would do something so warm for me. She was a great friend. Someone I had know for many years. We laughed together. Cried together. Fought together. She is my "Girl." The ride or die female in my life. I have a boyfriend that I love very much but girls have a connection that men don't understand. Not many women could tell their significant other about frozen pond dreams and not get sarcasm or the "crazy" look.

As we pull up to the restaurant, she encourages me to forget about the dreams the interpretations and to just enjoy a nice night out. I knew she was right about that and I promised her we would have a great evening enjoying each others company. No frozen ponds, no jobs, no boyfriends or husbands.

We got inside the restaurant and were seated. From the moment we sat down, it was just a good time. We laughed, we reminisced. We solved the world's problems through discussion. It was just a great time. At one point I thought I saw someone I recognized out of the corner of my eye. No, could that be my boyfriend walking toward me. How did he know I was here. My friend's husband was walking in single file behind him. What are they doing here I wondered. Everyone, including my friend had a smile on their face.

My boyfriend walked up to me and without another word, gave me one of the sexiest kisses I've ever had from him. Without pause, he dropped to one knee and opened a ring box in my face. "Will you marry me?" he asked. I looked at the smiling waiter and the smiling couple at the next table and my smiling friend and her smiling husband. I responded "Yes" without another thought. In that moment we kissed heavily and a lot.

"I have one more surprise and I hope you'll still want to marry me after you hear it." I looked at him lovingly but with precaution. He just blurted it out, "I just got promoted...more money, more power." I smiled even wider. "But the jobs in Chicago." Whuh Whuh smile suppressed. "Alright, don't Leave me now," he said. I looked at him with some surprise in my eyes. "Your girl here told me about your dreams so I wanted to tell you about this as soon as possible because I want you to make this journey with me, but I also wanted you to have time to think it over."

"Baby, I know you've told me about not liking the cold..." he continued. "...but this is a great opportunity for us both." I could only stare at him. How could my worst fear be complicating my greatest dream right before my eyes. The funny thing is, I love this man and want to marry him, but what kind of premonition trash has my mind produced that I'm dreaming about frozen ponds. I shook my head. Looked into his eyes and saw that the love he had for me was mutual. Which I already knew.

I screamed "Yes" to his marriage proposal as tears ran down my face. I didn't care about running makeup, ugly cry face of even frozen ponds at the moment, I just cared that the man I love, who also loves me, wants to marry me. After several minutes of screaming and crying, he carried me out of the restaurant to his car. We hugged and kissed more, not caring about the soft porn show we were putting on for all who watched. He opened my door on his Mercedes and saw me safely into the car.

"I have to move to Chicago within the month," he said. "I'd like for us to get married before we move." I was completely in shock. Everything was happening so fast. I couldn't speak. I was happy, just in shock. So I took him home and made sweet love to him. Never answering any of his questions.

The next morning we woke up. He had an early meeting so we parted never really speaking about the issue at hand. I showered, put on my comfy robe and sat back in my big chair with a cup of coffee. My mind was a mess. So much had been going on prior and so much had happened in the last twenty-four hours and I could barely think.

Yes I love this man and no I don't want to live in a cold climate, but for this man...the answer is not absolutely "No." So, I had a lot of thinking to do. I sat back and took a long sip off my coffee. This morning being a "frosty bitch" in theory was my worst problem. Now I could really end up being a "frosty bitch' in more than one way.

I didn't know know where this was going or how it was going to end up. What I did know is that dreams about frozen ponds were the least of my worries now and that I had a marriage proposal on the table. Frozen ponds dreams and my hatred of cold weather were quickly taking a back seat as "Fears" of mine.