Sorry sometimes doesn't cut it

This is my friend Deepak Singh's story. Each time I think what he went through I tear up. Deepak and I live a few minutes from each other in Cinncinnati, U.S.A. Deepak immigrated to the US from India with his parents and two brothers in 1997. They are originally from Barielly. In 2000 Deepak started working at Williamson & Kapadia Accountants in Cinncinnati. I met him there. At that time I was working at the firm for nearly 3 years. Soon we became good friends. After many years when we got married our wives also became friends and now Deepak's son is good friends with my daughters.

Deepak was initially married in 2005 in India but in 2006 went through a very painful divorce. He remarried in the US in 2009.

I recall in 2005 Deepak was elated. His parents had fixed an arranged marriage with their family friends' daughter Priyanka in Kanpur. Although they were family friends Deepak had never met Priyanka. In fact he had never been to Kanpur. He talked with Priyanka's father once on the phone before immigrating to the US. Now after video chats, emails and phone calls for nearly 4 months Priyanka and he agreed to get married in Kanpur. The plan was for Deepak to return to the US in 2 weeks after the wedding and Priyanka would come there after 4 months. She needed to complete her graduate degree in Chemistry; Deepak had applied for her visa and she could go to the US in a few months. Later her immigration papers would be filed as well.

In Bareilly Deepak's Chacha ji and his family lived. He was Deepak's father's younger brother. The wedding took place on August 6th, 2005. It was a nice wedding. The next day Deepak and Priyanka went to the family house in Bareilly. At first everything was good for two or three days. Then Priyanka's parents came to Bareilly and stayed at her cousin's house. They came to visit Priyanka and Deepak. Deepak was ill for a few days so he could not be intimate with Priyanka. He told her that he was not feeling well and that he was looking forward to when she joined him in the US later. Priyanka was fine with this but her cousin Mohit started instigating her against Deepak. Deepak was unsure why Mohit did not like him.

On August 21st Deepak had to take a train from Bareilly to Lucknow as he was taking a flight from Lucknow to New York via Muscat. At Lucknow Airport the flight got delayed and Priyanka and the rest of the family returned. Deepak was waiting for his flight. The delay was more than 4 hours. He got very emotional and in a moment of weakness did not take the flight and returned home.

In Bareilly Priyanka and her family were not too happy to see Deepak. They felt he was immature and was not taking his job seriously. Now Deepak rescheduled his flight so that he could return to the US in late August. 3 days before his flight Priyanka and he had a big fight. It was over a minor issue but unfortunately Deepak over-reacted and yelled a bit. The next day he was very apologetic and said sorry a few times. The day he was leaving he hugged Priyanka and said he was awfully sorry and that he should not gotten angry. Priyanka said that it was ok and that she will join him in the US in a few months.

Deepak returned to the US on August 31st. He was very tired so when he got home he slept. The next day he called Priyanka's house. Priyanka's father answered the phone: "Deepak, do not call us from now on. Priyanka does not ever want to talk with you any more and we will file for a divorce soon. Either you agree or be ready for a legal battle!" Deepak was so shattered. He pleaded to talk with Priyanka but her father did not let him speak with her. On her own she never contacted Deepak. Priyanka's lawyer met with Deepak's family and they also hired a lawyer. As a last resort he called Priyanka and she only listened on the phone.

Deepak: "Priyanka, please forgive me. I will say sorry a thousand times. What I did was wrong. Please don't punish me. I don't want this marriage to end. Give me a chance! Please!" He started sobbing.

Priyanka did not utter a single word. After two minutes of a 'long' silence she hung up the phone.

Deepak was heartbroken. His dreams were shattered at that time. In early 2006 the divorce was finalized in India. As power of attorney was given to his Chacha ji he did not have to go to India for the court proceedings. He never saw Priyanka or heard from her again.

When he found that the divorce was finalized he came to my house as he wanted to have a chat.

Deepak: "Are yaar Ravi, sorry sometimes doesn't cut it! I feel so guilty. I know I did a big mistake but how could Priyanka and her family be so heartless??" That day he cried non-stop for more than 2 hours. I tried to console him but it was nearly impossible that day.

In a few years he got married in the US to a very nice woman named Geeta. Geeta's family is originally from Indore, India.

Even after so many years he still feels the pain of his divorce from Priyanka. However, the pain is quite minimal now. Having Geeta in his life has been a boon to him.

Two days ago he and I met for lunch on a weekend at a restaurant.

Deepak: "I am happy now bhai but I will always have a small void in my life. I was so happy in 2005 but everything went wrong. Priyanka was the last person I wanted to hurt unintentionally or intentionally. I could have never imagined what the outcome of that relationship would be. You know I will never get a chance to talk with Priyanka again but if I had only 2 minutes I would tell her 'Sorry! Sorry! If you can please don't hate me! Try to forgive me. We could have had a good life but destiny had other plans in mind for us. Often I wish I had never met you!!"

He broke down and hugged me. I told him things will be fine. He told me that Geeta and his son were waiting for him in a few hours so after our lunch I walked with him to his car. As he walked away I could sense that his eyes were calm but there seemed to still be a tinge of sadness. As he drove away from there I thought to myself that Deepak is a good man and I hope he can fully move on or at least manage it in a way that it does not overwhelm him.

His words that he told me years ago ringed in my ears a few times - 'Sorry sometimes doesn't cut it.'