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Sentient Creatures.

Fantasy Romance.

By Donna MC TaggartPublished 2 years ago Updated 2 years ago 5 min read
5
Edenvale

"There weren't always dragons in the valley. My father told me that my great grandfather used to walk every day across Edenvale without fear. It was the safest place in all of Fornovia. Neighbors helped each other, and children played and worked the land with their families. Nobody feared the green eyes, the mirrors, nor thought twice about leaving food out. My father told me about the red ball of flames that started it all. Nothing has been the same since..."

Dawn watched as Ercik peered tentatively over the dirt and remains of the once green area. The smell of burned hair and grass filled the air, and grey flecks of ash tickled her nose as Ercik sneezed in agreement.

Ercik's face burned and felt flush as he caught Dawn's gaze.

"How do you know all about the red ball? My family has never spoken of it, and won't talk of it. They are terrified of the mirrors, they won't even use glass for fear of a reflection. Your family is so much more open, mine hide secrets, big secrets. I fear they know something more than we can comprehend Ercik. I sometimes, I, I fear that they are ..."

Dawn used her tongue to graze around for the wet drops that meandered down her face. She drew her knees up to her stomach and positioned herself on her side, facing Ercik she gasped. "Blood Ercik, it's blood!"

Ercik motioned his finger in front of his lips to ssh Dawn. "It was either that or get served on a platter to Ergamore," Ercik whispered.

Small traces of stone and gems scattered and fell in a confetti of colour all around and on top of Ercik and Dawn, The laces on their trainers jumped in unison as the ground shook beneath them. Ercik's face grew pale and Dawn was frozen solid, no breath or movement came from either body in the ditch. They both lay motionless, moving solely because of the forced vibration beneath them.

A large green toe with an even bigger toenail hovered above Dawn's blonde head. The dirty, sharp toe sat there for what appeared to be an eternity. A loud noise in the distance boomed, and the toe disappeared releasing an avalanche of dirt that cascaded down on top of the two now shivering humans below. The loud thumping and breathing lessened and became more distant. Both bodies released some carbon dioxide into the atmosphere, their chests heaved together letting out the deepest of breaths and a sigh of relief flooded the small space.

Ercik's watch indicated they had been in the trench for over sixteen hours, everything had gone silent after the explosion that chased them to safety. Ercik thought about all the times he had tried to have a conversation with Dawn since he was four years old. Twelve years since then had passed, and he had always admired her beautiful blonde curly hair and her big innocent rugby ball-shaped blue eyes. The way her dimples showed when she smiled, her small but shapely frame highlighting her ample curves.

Dawn noticed Ercik staring at her now, almost trance-like. She shuffled a little awkwardly as he continued to stare. She couldn't help but notice his wavy mousey brown hair, one side was covering his left eye, disheveled from the last 16 hours in the dusty, smoky outdoors. His brown eyes seemed brighter than normal though, almost mesmerizing she thought.

"When did you get so muscly? Have you been working out Ercik?"

Ercik's body jerked into position as he realised how long he had been staring at this point. He noted Dawn's bright red face and decolletage area. Was she hot? did she get burned? "Sorry, what did you say?"

"Nevermind Ercik, I was thinking out loud is all. Anyway what time is it? I feel like I have been in this position for hours. I cannot feel my legs. I haven't heard any noise for a while now, everything is deathly silent. Is it safe to come out of this trench yet? Can we find some higher ground, can we get to the cave of the old man now? Please Ercik, I can't stand being here any longer, it feels like we are live bait. It's getting dark soon. Please can we move?" an exasperated Dawn quizzed.

Ercik slowly got up and scanned the valley. The ash had settled, the smoke had now diminished, and a hue of smoke hovered on parts of the ground like a strange fog. A kaleidoscope of orange, green, black, and purple swirled among the smoke.

No creature, man nor beast was in sight. The sunlight was fading now, darkness was waiting around the corner, waiting to strike again.

"Before we go, Dawn, what were you saying about your family before the Marmins came? You said earlier you thought they were something before I pulled you down and you scratched your face. What do you think they are or are involved in? Do you think they are masters of the Marmin? Or do you think they are behind the green-eyed people? Or worse, are they the untold ones?"

"Oh Ercik, I don't think so, I don't know, but they have kept many secrets from me and my little brother. My parents leave our home every night after midnight and I found, and I found a mirror under the straw in my father's hay loft in the barn. They don't know I found it, but you know the only kind of people or creatures who have mirrors in all of Fornovia don't you Ercik? I can't even bear the thoughts of what my family may be, because what would that make me, and what might I turn into when I reach 18 in two years Ercik. What will I become?

"Don't worry Dawn, I am sure you are mistaken, perhaps they don't even know the mirror is there, there is probably a reasonable explanation for it all. I wish the dragons would come back soon Dawn, we need them to return soon, we need their help..."

Fantasy
5

About the Creator

Donna MC Taggart

Reader insights

Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

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  1. Compelling and original writing

    Creative use of language & vocab

  2. Excellent storytelling

    Original narrative & well developed characters

  3. Eye opening

    Niche topic & fresh perspectives

  1. On-point and relevant

    Writing reflected the title & theme

  2. Easy to read and follow

    Well-structured & engaging content

  3. Heartfelt and relatable

    The story invoked strong personal emotions

  4. Masterful proofreading

    Zero grammar & spelling mistakes

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Comments (7)

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  • Mandy Meikle2 years ago

    If this is part of a longer work, where can I get a copy? An excellent teaser for a longer story in a fantasy world I'd like to learn more about. Well done Donna!

  • Jyme Pride2 years ago

    These words are so pretty: 'Small traces of stone and gems scattered and fell in a confetti of colour all around and on top of Ercik and Dawn..." They're the stuff that takes your breath away.....

  • Jyme Pride2 years ago

    With this story, you captured both my heart and my dreams! You made me melt inside . . . and wish -- you made me dearly wish I was there.

  • Sophie Buckland2 years ago

    Loved this excellent piece of writing! The detail was incredible… It allowed me to totally immerse myself in the fictional world and the characters. Need another chapter though.. what happened? Did the dragons come back? If they did.. did they help them?!

  • Vivienne Knox2 years ago

    I was totally transported to another world reading this. It felt vibrant and fresh and I’m intrigued as to where it will take me next

  • Ian Mitchell2 years ago

    I was immediately drawn into the unknown world of this story and it’s changes since the red ball came. I’m intrigued by the little drops of information that have been subtly blended into this first chapter. I’m instantly invested in the characters and there are strong feelings of tension and wonder at what lies ahead. Who are the Marmins and who are the Green Eyes? What is the situation with Dawns parents and what is the significance of the mirrors? I automatically assumed the dragons would be the enemy but loved the hint that they are going to be allies. I want to read more!

  • Evelyn McAleer2 years ago

    I sat back while my partner read me this story. We have been left hanging wanting to know so much more. Who are the untold ones? Who are the Marmins? What will happen when she becomes eighteen? The author most certainly had us feeling what the young man and girl felt. Excellent piece of work we really want to read more.

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