Out Into the Real World!

“I’m moving out!” Allan declares. The idea is spontaneous, yet his voice possesses an utmost determination. Allan graduated high school not more than an hour ago, and he had just gotten home. He stands on the driveway with both his parents under the front yard pear tree. The three had yet to step inside.

“You graduated not more than an hour ago!” says his mother, understanding simple stupidity.

“That’s exactly it! I finished high school. Now I’m ready for the world. And I’ve got my jeep!”

At that, Allan presses the remote for the garage door. It drones up from behind him, revealing his most prized possession. Allan never had a romantic partner, but he did have his jeep. It was passed down from his parents, and now it was his baby.

“Well I guess I better start packing!” he remarks.

Allan kicks the locked door wide open, then walks inside. His mother stands in his dust, house key in hand, jaw dropped.

Mom and Dad share a glance on the driveway but no words come out. Meanwhile, Allan is nearly finished packing his belongings. He’s pulled off his bed’s duvet and pillow and now he’s shovelling his closet into an extra large duffel bag. The garage is where he meets them, where he begins packing his jeep. Allan moves with the efficiency of a computer while his parents watch with the confusion of those who can not understand a new technology.

“Oh honey, are you really going?” questions Mom.

“Just, don’t do anything stupid,” warns Dad.

“I’ll try my best,” says Allan.

“You’ve only had your license for two weeks.” says Allan’s father, taking on a serious tone. He’s eyeing the beautiful vehicle which was once his own.

“Its entire life, your mom and I have taken care of the thing. We’ve done routine oil changes, kept it fed on gas, and replaced any worn parts.”

“There’s more to maintaining a vehicle than one may think,” notes Allan’s mother.

“Are you really ready to do it all on your own?” his father asks.

“Mom, Dad. I’m ready,” says Allan, turning his attention to his parents. “And I’m about to have a whole lot of fun!” A great goofy grin as he says the last word.

"Oh shoot! I forgot food!" Allan remarks. He rushes to the pear tree, stripping off every last pear. That makes five of them.

Allan hops into the jeep, twists the key, then the engine kicks into action.

“Goodbye Mom and Dad! I love you both!” Allan yells over the engine’s rumbling idle.

“Goodbye Allan!” they shout, only it’s now far too loud to hear them.

Soon Allan is off on the open road. There’s nothing but him, his jeep, and the smooth breeze drafting in through the open window.

“Where to go? What to do?” Allan wonders out loud.

As an answer to his questions he sees something special parked off the highway. It’s an all black heavy duty pickup truck, lifted high enough so that no short person could climb in. Next to it are two young men, likely brothers. They notice his jeep with excitement, and signal him to pull over to chat. And so Allan does, a wide grin on his face.

“I’m Tex.” says the tall one.

“I’m Trevor,” says the short one.

“We’re brothers,” says Tex. The two had an unusual charm, and Allan loved their style.

“We know about a little mud pit nearby. It’s great for some four wheel fun like that jeep you’ve got there.”

“Ooh hoo hoo,” Allan giggles with overbearing excitement. He tells them he’s in, and after following them down a service road for a little while, he arrives at the spot. It's a drained lake bed; now a mud playground; a bouncy castle for off-road rigs.

Four wheel drive engaged, and Allan is off. He races through the mud, driving deeper and deeper into the funhouse, as well as deeper into the ground.

“No problem for me!” grins Allan.

Soon he’s all alone. Then, a small, sharp hill catches his jeep like a balancing scale. He’s stopped and stuck.

“Oh shit,” says Allan. “Shit.”

He grows tense, slamming down the accelerator pedal to the floor. The engine heats up. Smoke from the hood? Yes. It becomes clear he’s going nowhere, but Allan continues burning gas. He does so until there’s none left, so eventually, the engine cuts. Now Allan is stranded, in the middle of nowhere.

“Shit,” says Allan. He diagnoses it as an overheating issue, failing to notice the fuel gauge sits on empty.

Minutes pass, then hours. Allan has run out of pears and now it’s getting cold. Standing on the roof of his jeep, he can see that the majority of the weekend warriors have gone home. There’s only a few drivers off in the distance. Tex and Trevor remain, their truck visible far off. It’s parked perpendicular to Allan. Allan waves his hands wildly in the wind. There’s no question they’re watching. The truck shifts into gear, suddenly racing toward Allan. It’s there in no time.

“We happen to be mechanics,” explains Trevor. We work out of an old barn in the countryside. We could tow you there, fix up your ride.”

“I have no objections,” says Allan, a smile returning to his face.

Tex and Trevor attach the winch cable on the jeep to their truck’s rear bumper, Allan hops in, and then they’re off. The jeep gets dragged out with ease.

Near sundown, the group arrives at what Tex and Trevor call their place of residence. There’s a surplus of open land, with an ominous structure toward the deepest end. It’s an old barn. Truly decrepit.

It’s large and certainly ludicrous when Trevor says, “This is where we’ll work on your jeep. This is our garage.”

“A truly exquisite work space,” reasons Tex. “The ample space allows us to work around any issue your jeep throws at us.”

“It’s an overheating issue,” explains Allan. “The engine’s going to need some serious attention.”

Trevor sighs. “In that case we’ll wait till morning.” He looks around, showing an air of uncertainty. “We’ll have to ask you to tent on the yard.”

“Where’s your house?” asks Allan.

“Just right past those trees, up the hill, and to the right a little bit,” bursts Tex far too quickly.

“Oh,” says Allan. “What about in the barn?”

“It would be worse in there,” says Trevor. “For one, it smells like shit. Also, it’s best left as a garage.”

“Come on,” says Tex. “We’ll pull the jeep in and you can have a look.”

Tex swings open the doors while Trevor hops into his truck. Allan steps inside to guide Trevor, only it’s completely dark, and Allan can’t see much of anything. The smell is appalling nonetheless. It’s not what one would expect of a garage - grease, oil, and the sweat of one’s labor. It smells as an old barn would, with rot and feces as the main event.

Trevor fires up the truck, ready to reverse, and soon its brake lights illuminate the barn’s interior as he prepares to reverse the jeep. It throws a subtle red glow over everything, for just a couple seconds. The light is faint, causing Allan to squint to make out the interior. It’s a plain old barn, equipped with a pig pen and farm tools. The only auto related things are an old tractor and some jerry cans, but there’s no tools to fix the jeep.

Tex and Trevor act with haste. Before Allan knows it, the jeep has been towed inside, Tex disconnects it from their truck, and Trevor drives out, shrouding the old barn once again in a terrible darkness. Tex hurriedly motions Allan to come out, then he shuts the doors and locks it with a big hearty padlock.

“Get a good rest, and we’ll be up and at it early tomorrow morning,” says Tex, hopping into the truck.

“Thank you fellas,” says Allan.

Tex and Trevor drive up the hill and out of sight. Then, Allan is alone. He turns his attention toward the tent, his home for the night.

“Just how did I end up here?” he asks himself, shaking his head.

He’s lost his grin, and now he’s confused. His doubt had settled in and he carried this with him into the tent. It was cold, uncomfortable, and far from home.

Sleep was not going to be an option, Allan reasoned after about two hours in the tent. He unzips the door, bringing the ominous barn into view. The jeep is shut in there, and he can sense its sadness, its disconnect from the world. Allan had failed to take care of it like his parents did. In the hands of Tex and Trevor, thinks Allan. He gets out of his tent and walks around the yard. Who are they anyway? he wonders. He marches up the hill, past the trees and to the right a little bit, as Tex described. No house in sight. Suddenly it dawns on him. Squatters. Thieves.

“Bandits!” Allan lets out, perhaps a little too loud. He runs to the barn to check on his jeep. No wonder they padlocked the door. Then, in response to his yell, a truck engine fires up. Allan sneaks around the back, finds a rotten plank to kick in, then lets himself into the barn. The truck roars down the hill. He hears Tex and Trevor hop out, and so he runs to the barn’s main doors, tripping over debris. They remove the padlock, and Allan jams a hearty shovel between the doors, just in time to stop them.

“The hell is going on?” screams Trevor. “Tex, check the tent. That idiot’s onto us!”

Allan freezes. There’s no time to fix an engine. He could run, but he can’t lose his jeep. He hops in the driver’s seat, twisting the key in the ignition. The dash lights up. It reads, Check Gauges.

A quick glance shows the engine’s temperature cooled off. Next to it, much more subtle, he sees the simple fuel gauge. Empty.

Allan could curse himself a million times for being the world’s biggest idiot but there was no time for that. He remembers the old tractor and its jerry cans and scrambles for the fuel. The jeep’s headlights bounce light off the door, illuminating the barn’s interior in a white light. As Allan pours the fuel, Trevor returns with an axe.

“We’re comin’ in, partner!” he says, swinging at the door. The rotten planks crumble and soon Tex and Trevor can see Allan. They throw curses and insults, but Allan maintains focus.

Allan is not one to forget the icing on the cake; before dropping the fuel can he wets the floor, does circles around the car, and soaks the walls in gasoline. He readies a match, then hops in his jeep. Twist of the key, and vroooom, it comes to life.

“What-da-heck!” scream Tex and Trevor, simultaneously.

They have no time to wander, only dive out of the way as Allan slams on the gas. He tosses the match, engulfing the barn in flames as he drives away. He’d put on his shades, but he forgot them at home.

* * *

Pulled over at a rest stop the next morning, Allan gets out to stretch, go to the bathroom, and make a phone call. It takes only one ring for him to answer.

“Hello?” says the voice on the other end.

“Hey Dad,” says Allan. “I just wanted to say, you and Mom were right about a few things. You know, fuelling up on gas and everything.”

There was a sly chuckle at that, then Allan leaned back and relaxed. They talked of family and independence, of staying safe and having fun, and how next time, Allan would be sure to stay on paved road. He also mentioned he'd bring a little more food than a few pears, for his stomach was starved.