Night Owl

It all started when I was five years old. I hadn’t a care in the world then. My days were very predictable. I wasn’t in school yet, so I stayed home with my mother. Every day we would be in the kitchen preparing dinner for when my father came home. One night, my mother was acting strange. She was pacing back and forth and had a worried look on her face. She tried so hard not to show me she was afraid of something.

I began to see time go by as we sat in the kitchen waiting for my father to come through the door. To me it felt like it was forever but, it was only about an hour. To a five-year-old that feels like an eternity. Then suddenly the phone rang in the living room. I tried to follow my mother and she stopped me. She told me to stay there and grab the loaf of bread out of the refrigerator. When I set it on the table, I heard the loudest scream, and I ran to my mother’s side to see her crying on the floor with the phone next to her.

We sat there in the living room until it was light out. My mother couldn’t speak a single word. She barely had the strength to look at me. I couldn’t believe he was gone. I was never going to see my father again. Though I was very young I learned first-hand what grief looked like. I had an ache in my heart like no other. Prior to losing my father I only had knowledge of being sad from losing a toy.

The next few days my mother was constantly on the phone with people. I had no idea who she’d been talking to, and I knew better than to ask. It was none of my business. Over the course of eight days my mother slipped in and out of her depressed state. It was very hard on me as I couldn’t take care of myself fully. She snapped out of it long enough to feed me, bathe me, and put me to bed. There were no good night kisses or bedtime stories. She seemed like she wasn’t there. Like a part of her soul was ripped away from her.

On day eleven my grandmother came over. The days leading up to her arrival friends and family attempted to come by the house to speak to my mother and give their condolences. She refused to let anyone inside. The window shades were drawn, and she had covered all the mirrors with black lace fabric. The moment my grandmother knocked on the door it was like my mother was alive again. She swung the door open hitting the wall with the doorknob. She ran into my grandmother’s arms and cried. My grandmother held her as they walked back inside.

“Can you go play in your room Elenore? Mommy needs to talk about grownup stuff with grandma.” My mother kindly asked. “Yes mommy. I love you. I love you too grandma.” I replied. My grandmother looked at me, smiled and said, “I love you too peanut.” As I walked into my room, I left my door open. I wanted to hear what they were saying even if I didn’t understand it all. I also didn’t want to get in trouble for eavesdropping. I made sure I had my dolls in hand just in case one of them got up to use the bathroom and saw me sitting there.

They must have known what I was up to because they were speaking very low. Their words were so muffled that I could hardly make them out, but I was able to hear my mother say something about seeing an owl during our trip to the supermarket the night before my father’s passing. She said she knew just then that someone was going to die.

My grandmother stated to her that she had seen one just hours before police say my father died. “I’m so sorry my baby girl. I tried to shelter you all your life from the curse of death that the night owl brings. I never wanted you to fear them. Perhaps I should have prepared you for what it means when you see them. They have been the death of many in our family. I’m so sorry.” My grandmother said to my mother.

My mother replied, “Oh mom, I knew. I have feared the owl since the night I drove with Aunt Karen to pick up Uncle Jack from his cabin. We were in the station wagon, the brown one with all the creaks in it. Do you remember? Well anyway, on our way to get him there was a night owl dead and center in front of the car. My Aunt began crying and I didn’t understand what was happening. She kept it to herself though.

On our way back a thick fog rolled in, and we couldn’t see. That’s when we were in the wreck and Aunt Karen and Uncle Jack were hurt. He died in the hospital the next day. When I was in the hospital room Aunt Karen came to see me. She was bruised and cut. She started crying and she told me the story of how the owl takes the life of those around us that see it. She told me to prepare myself and know that death is coming if I see one. She said there is nothing we can do to stop it.

From that day on I have feared the owl coming for me. He did though mom. He came for me. He took away the only man who ever loved me like daddy did.” My grandmother took my mother in her arms and rocked her then kissed her on the forehead. “Oh my baby girl.” She whispered.

Moments later my grandmother came into the hallway and told me to follow her into the living room. Once there she told me to have a seat on the couch next to my mother. She said, “I want to tell both of you the true story of the owl and why you should not be afraid. Yes, the fear of the night owl is real, but you don’t know the full story. The owl does not bring death. The owl does not kill anyone. The owl is a channel to the spirit world.

The owl is believed to symbolize that death is near and the owl is around to protect the soul once it has left the body. In many cultures people believe that seeing the owl allows for families to say goodbye before their loved one passes and to know their loved one will go to heaven as their soul is carried by the owl. The owl is seen as sacred for some. For others it is a curse to know that death is surrounding you and that you will lose someone close to you.

The choice is yours to see it as a burden or as a symbol of peace. Today I choose to see it as a chance to say goodbye to those I care about. I used to only see it as a curse. A stalking by death. Now I know it can be a blessing. Not everyone is lucky enough to see it before someone dies and they don’t get to say goodbye. I hope you will see that the owl is here to safely take us from this world to the next.”

That was thirteen years ago. My grandmother has long sensed passed. I took the knowledge of my grandmother’s story and I carried it with me all this time. The day the owl came for me I was sixteen. Just two years ago. I was still living in my childhood home on Clinton Street in Fresno, Ca. My mother was at work, and I was bored after finishing my homework. I decided to go upstairs and have a look around. I hadn’t been up there in a while. I slowly made my way up the creaking stairscase. The first thing I noticed when I got to the top of the stairs and looked to my right was that the bedroom doors were all open. There was a bedroom right in front of the stairs, one ahead when I turned and another just off to the right. We had a huge five-bedroom house.

I was curious to see how everything was holding up since I had stopped sleeping up there when my father passed away. I walked into my old bedroom, the one to the right. I started touching my dolls and walked over to my dresser. I pulled out clothes that were from age five. They were so small and cute. Then I walked to my tiny closet and opened the door.

Hanging there was a pink and white dress with ruffles at the bottom. On the hanger was also a pink ribbon for my hair. Just below it was a pair of pink and white shoes with a pair of white stockings rolled into a ball inside one of them. My mother always had everything in order and ready for school the next day. I laid on my canopy bed and stared up at the cloth just above me. I grabbed a teddy bear that was on the bed.

I heard a noise “whoo, whoo” It was the owl yelling from the ground beneath my window. I knew what it was without having to look at it. I refused to look at it. I believed it would somehow pass me by if I didn’t see it. I was instantly filled with terror. Down the stairs I tripped as I was running. I caught myself before I could hit my face. Later, I had dinner ready for my mother. I acted like nothing had happened. Days went by without incident. I began to relax. I had beat the system. I didn’t have to worry.

Then it happened. I got invited to a dance at my high school. My mother said I couldn’t go. I wasn’t allowed to hang out with boys, so I knew she wasn’t going to say yes. We got into a huge argument, And I slammed my door after screaming “I hate you!” She replied, “ it’s OK if you hate me. I’m your mother not your friend. And speaking of friends, you will not be seeing yours. You are grounded for a week for that mouth of yours.”

I didn’t care. I snuck out and went to the dance. I had fun with my boyfriend Derrick. The dance was held in the gymnasium of the school. It was so hot they had the doors open. This gave a view of the football field. Suddenly I saw it. Standing in the middle of the field and staring right at me. The owl was there. Everything went silent. I can’t tell you how I got home. I blocked most of that night out. I crawled back into my room through the window hoping my mother wouldn’t notice I was gone.

I put on my pajamas and went to look for her to apologize. I knew by seeing the night owl again I had a chance to say goodbye to everyone I loved, and she was the only one left that I loved. The house was dark. I looked to my left. Her bedroom door was closed. I didn’t hear anything, but I went in anyway. She wasn’t there. I proceeded to look in the living room. I figured she must have fallen asleep on the couch while watching television. She wasn’t there either.

I walked into the kitchen. There was a note on the counter. It read, “Dear darling girl, I went to your room to tell you I was sorry for grounding you and to see if you wanted to watch a movie with me. I even made popcorn. When you didn’t answer I was scared. I saw an owl the other night and I was afraid something would happen to you. You are all I have left in this world since I lost your grandma. I’m going out to look for you. I’m sorry. I love you.”

My heart sunk into my stomach. I felt like such a jerk. I had no idea she saw an owl and that is why she didn’t want me to leave. She feared for my life like I had feared for hers. I quickly called my boyfriend and told him to pick me up. We went out to look for her. It was too late. We were stopped by police at a checkpoint. My boyfriend rolled down his window. “ good evening officer, what’s going on?” He asked. The officer responded, “ A car went over the guard rail over there.” He pointed to the right. “ unfortunately, The driver did not survive. We have been unable to reach the next of kin.” I had a sinking feeling. We drove back to my house to wait for my mom. When we walked in there was a red light flashing on the answering machine. It was the police letting me know my mother was in a car accident and passed away. I never got to tell her I was sorry.

Today I live every day like it’s my last because I never know when the owl, I see will be my own. Don’t take your loved ones for granted because you might not get the chance to say you’re sorry. I wish I would have listened to my mother that night. Maybe she would still be alive. Tell your loved ones you love them. It costs nothing.

The End!