Matured

“They’re here.”

I bolt awake with a start. The simple whispered phrase haunting my moons. The glowing white eyes, that after lunars of the repeat occurrence in my dreams, are burned into my psyche. The white eyes of something long dead. Moon after moon. Without fail. I wish I knew what it meant. I wish I knew who those eyes belonged to. Maybe then, I wouldn’t be plagued by them. Maybe then, I could get a decent moon of slumb.

No matter. I’m awake now. I lay my forehead back against my knee as I wait for my heart rate to slow and steady. I take a few deep breaths as chills, from this fear fueled cold sweat, rack my body. Once I’m calm, I lift my head from my folded knees. I wiggle my toes as I look upward, stretching my neck and back with a slow, deep arch. I release my hands from around my bent legs and gently place the knife I hold down at my left hip. I carefully lengthen and stretch my stiff legs. I wait for my eyes to adjust, wait for the small, cave like area I occupy that’s blanketed in darkness to come into focus. It’s taking longer now, longer every solar.

I gingerly pat the ground to my immediate right, feeling for my pack and my canteen. I find it with ease, considering. But, creature of habit that I am, especially now, it’s no surprise. I grab my canteen and swiftly undo its lid. Still unable, but luckily not needing to see, I reach into the front pocket of my pack and grab the small toothbrush from its right corner. I take a generous sip of aqua, nearly filling my mouth, then I wedge the head of the brush into my pursed lips. I brush with firm pressure in a closed, aqua filled mouth, to keep the noise muffled. You can never be sure if it’s safe to make noise.

Once I finished brushing, I took an actual drink from my canteen, then swiftly and deftly returned my belongings to their designated areas. I still can’t see, but time is of the essence. And what I lack in sight, I make up for in skill, stealth, and moreover, experience.

I slide my arms through my pack, wearing it on my chest, and ease myself to my feet. I think I’m alone. I don’t hear any breathing. I don’t see any movements. But at this point, I’m never quite sure. I use my hands to guide myself along the cave wall and out of its mouth. I’m in an open tunnel and I’m in the clear. It’s completely silent. And I’m finally able to see.

I feel the wall to the left of the cave entrance I stand in. There’s nothing there. I reach over and run my hand along the wall to the right of the entrance. And I feel the small, cool, raised line I used fingernail polish to paint last moon, to let me know which way I’ve been. I proceed left.

Considering how long it took my eyes to adjust, it’s lucky that no one had joined me in that cave. I’m so close to my twentieth annu, so close to transition, so close to the unknown. I have about three more solars, if I had to guess, until I transition into a matured. And it’s been nearly six years since I’ve seen a matured.

One normal solar, when I was fourteen, and I still had a full glow and grey eyes, a few of my quaints and I were gathering fruit in the brush. My mama had my younger siba with her as she hung the clothes out to dry. Nani, my siba, was exploring the yard, but staying where she could be reined by mama. My sibo, Doni, was off with his quaints, being a wild young male, as he should. My mama was a blue eyed. She was a healer and aqua worker. She did washing, cooking, and medicine making. And I wanted to be a blue eyed just like her. My baba was a brown eyed. He was a stonesman. He built buildings, crafted weapons and shields, and mined minerals. Doni wanted to be a brown eyed like baba. But we wouldn’t know what our sect would be until we transitioned on our twentieth annu, when we become a matured and lose our glow. Our eye color becoming, would tell what area we would find ease and excellence, and be of best use to our village.

“Tani! Tani, come!” I heard my mama call. So I, and my quaints, all raced back to the village, with our fruit packs holding what we gathered. Mama shielded her eyes watching us five girls run towards her together, creating a glow to rival the stars. Our sun kissed, brown skin, glowing side by side, was like seeing polished copper under direct sunshine. We got to my mama, winded and laughing. My mama asked me to take Nani with us all for a while because she needed to collect some herbs for medicines, and had to stay focused. I agreed. I snatched up the wrapper and tied Nani to my back, left my pack in the house, and ran off into the fields with my quaints.

We ran races and drew pictures in the terra, for each other to guess. Nani went aslumb on my back, still glowing as she napped, being that she was not yet 5 annues. As we walked and chatted, and picked sugarfluers, and sucked the sweet nectar from the stems, we felt the ground tremble. It was slight at first. Almost unnoticeable. At first. I thought, maybe I was just a bit unsteady. Maybe a bit sunlogged from being out all solar. The second tremble was more noticeable. And the third was jarring. We all looked at each other and began walking back to our homes. There was a fourth tremble that was so strong it caused us to stop in place, and all around the village, the ground began to part. I grabbed onto my quaint, Senah, to stay steady. A few moments later, huge beasts, taller than any man, emerged from the spaces in the terra. They were plump, dark and slimy, and had scythe-like appendages that glowed with an intense white light. They moved much faster than their size would make you believe possible. Each beast located and appeared next to a matured. I scanned the area, looking for mama. I saw her steadying herself near a bicup tree, when a beast appeared beside her. It opened its maw, wide, wide, wider than you could imagine and bit into my mama, as she stood frozen with fear. I screamed and fell to my knees, as I saw what I thought was gallons of her blood spray across the beast, the tree, and the terra. The beast bent down to consume what was left of her before her remains could fall to the ground, finishing her completely in two unnatural bites. And then it vanished. That sight and the sounds of it’s masticating, will forever haunt me.

It was said that 42 seconds passed from the first quake, until the last of the matured was consumed that solar. Planet wide, there was no one left, who had already gotten their colored eyes.

We all, the juviles, being who were left, joined up at the center of the village. We slumbed together in the biblio, it being the largest building on our grounds. Solars passed. And then weeks. And then a lunar, without incident. The elders of us saw to cooking and cleaning for the youngs, and washing away what was left of our families. The closest to matured in our village was a young man, Vashu, who was seventeen annues. He became the chief, and we voted on a council. Six other members, fifteen annues and plus. We elected Jonue, Sentri, Bandi, Melwain, Gano, and my quaint, Senah. All very bright, steadfast, capable leaders. As a whole, all juviles had input on the happenings of our new village, but the council had the final say so.

Four lunars had gone by when my siba Nani, sadly, passed on from a case of aqua sickens. She snuck away and drank from a contaminated source, and was wrecked by blood vomits. Us all being grey eyes, and untrained in any specialized skills, had no way of crafting medicine to heal her. And no way of knowing which of the already crafted medicines would do the trick. Mama always knew by the sniff of it. She’d hold a tinct to her nose and know if it was for aqua sickens or bad blood or trashi rash, with a single waft. Nani is with mama and baba now, and there’s a comfort in that.

Doni, my sibo is just 1 annu lessed than me, so he is independent and cares for himself. He helped take care of the youngs with the rest of us. He also helped hunt with the older males. And I helped with cooking, cleaning and caretaking with the older femmes.

At seven lunars since, shortly after my fifteenth annu, there was a meeting to be had within our village. Our village had grown to include four more villages, and our council added one new member from each village to its ranks. At midi, we all gathered in the center to await the news. It was announced that, since things were stable and assured, and it was known that the beasts had only the intention to hunt and consume the matured, we should now, as a whole, focus on growing our numbers, by births. And that all femmes of twelve annu and plus, would become birthers. Their couplemate, not to exceed two anuues plus or lessed than that of the femme, will be decided by the council. And that if after three lunars, no conceiving had occurred, a new couplemate would be assigned.

There was an audible gasp among the gathered. Mostly from femmes. The males didn’t seem to care too much in one way or the other. The objections poured out from the crowd.

“Is twelve not too young?”

“How are couplemates selected?”

“What if we object?”

“What are the duties of the birthers while carrying?”

“Who is to care for the young we have now?”

Questions upon questions poured out. And the council answered every one. Largely assuaging all the anger and contempt among us. By the end of the two heure meeting, there were no objections. All femmes who felt ill equipped to birth at this time, would be given three lunars to come to terms, and while deciding, would be responsible for the birth tending and caring for the thruglows among the village. Thruglows, being those lessed five annu. Called such because, before our fifth annu, we glow all the time, even while we slumb, though the glow be dim. After our fifth annu, we no longer glow through our slumb. We glow bright from sun up to sun down, and dimly after sun down. When we go slumb, we go dark. So, we are called thruglows until our physes synch to the sun.

After the third lunar, any femme who is objecting, will be branded a workfemme, and will be tasked with the responsibilities of the males, building, hunting, mining, defense, all things our femme bodies are very illequipped to undertake. She shall be responsible for her assigned worktasks, and also her own sustaining, being that she is of lesser use to the village in such a role.

This, workfemme, was basically a death sentence. There would be no conceivable way for a femme to survive longer than three lunars under those conditions. A workfemme was allowed to, at any point, change her head, and become a birther, and fall under the protections and duties of such, those being cooking, light cleaning, phys aid, and cloth mending. Birthers, once confirmed by a change in glow from golded to silvered, are allowed a plus in sustains and a shorter work solar for their six lunars of carrying, and the three lunars following the birth.

These terms were voted on, accepted and lawed.

I left that day and took to the undergrounds. As did some other femmes. Because, why would I birth a young when it’s unknown if we be safe after transition? Why would I birth a young that I have maybe four annues to be with? No sense. So we left and became fuges. At the start, we would group together, two or three, and try to survive, using the terra holes the beasts left behind to come upbove, gathering fruit or fishing after solar end, when we don’t glow. Crafting weapons and tools from the ample stone around us. Staying out of sight as much as possible. But there’s risk in groupings. Risk in caring and bonding as a fuge. After the first lunar, seeing that we fuges were well equipped to survive in such a state, came the rounds. Groups of males were tasked with catching fuges and returning us to the village to assume our role of workfemme until we either change head or die. Being grouped, caring for another femme, the sibabond we’d inevitably build, was an easy and sure way to be catched if your quaint was catched. Who could turn a blind eye or ear to the plight of a loved quaint, a teammate, a siba. None. So slowly, we found it safer to go alone.

Almost four annues, I’ve been a fuge, in the underground, alone. Although my phys is slight, I’m strong, stronger than I ever knew possible. And I’m tough, clever, and skilled. I wouldn’t have made it to nineteen annu if I weren’t.

Being that I’ve been alone and a fuge, I have no idea what happens to us at our transition. I don’t know if the beasts are still consuming matured. I’ve yet to cross anyone near transition. I’ve yet to cross any beasts. They’re not the danger here. The danger are the rounders and the callers. Callers being youngs who will alert the rounders if they find one of us fuges. I’ve come across a caller twice in my time as a fuge. And each time, being them or me, I chose me.

Today, nearing the end of my nineteenth annu, I barely have any glow left. Upbove, this wouldn’t be an issue, but underground, my light source is my glow. The past weeks have been much difficult for me as my eyes try to adjust to the darkness, with a lessed and lessed light source. Today being the absolute worst.

I continue on my way, staying near the wall of the tunnel, as an added safety measure. I’m looking for aqua to fill my half empty canteen. I know there’s some nearby because there’s moss growth on stones and the terra is cold under my feet. Also, I can hear an occasional drip sound. I must be close.

I follow the drip to a wide opening to the right of the tunnel. The sound is much louder and the terra, colder, so I enter the area and climb over the felled stones to forward. A few steps beyond, I see a small, muted, golded glowing. There’s a young. A caller, I think. I freeze, unsure if I’m made.

“Me know you’re there!” A small voice shouts. “State your business!” I remain still and silent.

“Do not approach me. Me armed! State your business or be shot!” I remain. I don’t have clear sight of the young so it can’t have clear sight on me. I hear a drip, and out of nowhere, something small, firm and sharp lodges into my arm. I throw my hand over my mouth and nose to stifle a yell and brace against a wall. I try to remove the projectile but it’s covered in sharp points so I can’t touch it without it embedding in my fingers. I forgo it. I inch along the wall hoping to get sight on my opponent. If this young was a caller, they would’ve sounded by now. They were something else. Maybe the council had youngs guard aquas, knowing we’d have to refill regularly? It’s been ages since I’ve encountered anyone. I thought maybe the rounds had ended.

I silently inch along the wall and to face my foe. I slip my knife from my pack with my uninjured arm, ready to defend when necessary. I’m standing about 3 strides away from the young when I see them. A very small phys, hunched in the corner atop a stone pile with their back to me, ashen skin and a mound of dark, wild kinks atop their head, and a soft glow. No way the council would use a young this small.

“That was for stun. The next be—“

I hear and feel the stones shift. Instinctively I snatch the young up into my arms and rush us to a solid corner. A few stones dislodged from upbove and crashed down where the young had been a moment before. In the commotion, the embedded stone falls away from my arm, thankfully. I’m not too worse for the wear.

“Close one.” I say with a sigh. The young slaps about, wriggles from my arms and scurries to a far corner.

“Go away! Go away!” They scream. I quietly disobey, making my way closer. I hear a drip. “Don’t move!” They yell as they rifle through a small pack at their waist. They hold up a slinger and what looks like a small stone, arm it, pointing it in various locations. I hear another drip and the young points the slinger at my exact location, although their face is completely covered by their wild kinks, save their mouth.

“Easy, calm it. I’m not gonna harm you. If I wanted to harm you, I would’ve let those stones fall on you. I’m not gonna harm you.” The young, still with the slinger trained on me, scooted along the wall a bit, turned their ear to where the stones had fallen. I heard a drip sound and then the young says “You help me?”

“Yes” I respond.

“Why?” They ask.

“Why not?”

“No one help me. Them never help me! Why you? You from upbove?”

I hesitate, but answer “No.”

“Oh, you fuge! What’s you called?”

“Umm, Tani. What’s your call?” I ask.

“Them called me Scat.”

“Scat?” Scat is at best, used to tell one to go away, and at worst, a slang for…fecals.

“Yeah. I had another call, before, from mama, but me can’t thinks it now. Because always, since the beasts, them always say ‘Scat you! Scat!’ And pushded me away. So me call is Scat. And me don’t see.” They stated.

“You can’t see? Since the beasts?” I ask.

“No, since always. Me never did see.”

“How long have you been under?”

“Long.”

“How old are you?”

“Me not know.”

“Are you thruglow?”

“No. Me bigged out thruglow.”

“Okay. So if you can’t see, how do you know where I am?” I ask. .

“Well, me hears is great! And me do echo-tecky.”

“Echo-tecky?”

“Yeah! Mama taught me before. Me show you! Move a new, and shh shh, and me count and seek.”

I silently change my location in the room and wait. After a five count, Scat walks about, turning their head and making their way closer to me. once they were within a half stride of me, I see Scat’s mouth move and hear the drip. They walk over to me and grab my hand. I’m amazed.

“Wow. Brav! Brav!” I applaud. They beam. “So that drip sound was you?”

“Yep! My echo-tecky. It work best down here. And plus, them not around to scream or punch or kick at me. So this best. Me never go upbove.”

“I’m so sorry they were cruel to you. Your echo-tecky is so cool! So what do you eat?”

“Me sniff is great great! I sniffy fruits and good leafs and aqua. Was you need to find sustainings?”

“Uumm, yes actually. I was looking for aqua when we crossed paths.”

“Me find aqua easy! You help me, me help you. We quaints!” Scat smiles broadly at me. “We be quaints.” I smile back.

Scat and I adventured our way through the tunnels. They showed me all different types of safe fruits and leafs, and how they made their slinger and “lodgers” which was the sharp stone that lodged into my arm. They showed me how they made finger covers to hold the lodgers safely. A very clever and skilled young.

We finally make our way to an aquabank. The aqua is cold and clear and still. I see my reflection for the first time in ages, thanks to Scat’s soft glow. I can’t help but think their glow is muted because they never get any sunlight.

As I gaze, I see my mama’s face looking back at me. Even the crystal blue eyes. I’m a blue eyed like mama. I smile as those fully colored eyes fill with tears. Tears of sadness because if this was before, I’d be elated, mama would be thrilled. Tears of joy because I transitioned and I’m still here. I don’t know when it happened but it’s done. Maybe I can go upbove now. And learn medicine and healing, and get a home and take care of Scat. Maybe I can birth a baby someday. All the much time fretting, for nothing. I’m here, transitioned and safe. For the first time in much time, I feel hope. I feel joy. I’ll inform Scat of the good news after we go slumb.

As if reading my mind, Scat calls to me “maybe we should find a slumb spot?” I agree.

We journey ahead, me following Scat’s lead as they echo-tecky us to a safe clearing. My head is filled with imaginings of sun, and rain, and Doni, and sky, and grass, and sounds, and smells, and baked breads, and chicky egg tarts. I feel bliss.

We’re almost to a clearing, where the terra is warm and dry, when Scat, about 4 strides ahead of me stops sharp and turns their head to hear.

“What’s wrong?” I whisper.

Scat turns to me, trembling, and whispers “They’re here.”

There’s a huge tremble as the terra parts near me. Scat falls forward as the area illuminates in white light. Their hair is blown from their face and I see wide, glowing, white eyes, like those of something long dead. I look up and see a gaping maw full of serrated teeth, approach me as I hear an ear splitting scream.