Love in the Mail Car

Laura Mae Grumbling was born in the winter of 1873, in a sod cabin, on the plains of what later became the state of Oklahoma. She came into this world as a squalling red-faced brat showing the temperament that would lead her into a life of crime in the Old West. She began running with the gangs as an eighteen-year-old girl. Her relations with various gang members produced the quartet of children seen in the only photogravure print known to exist. The oldest child, Lizzie standing on her right, Evon Thomas on her left, Bobby-Jack and Prissy on her lap, each the progeny of different fathers.

She never received the notoriety of other Old West female outlaws. Known only as “Ma,” her nasty streak was never trifled with. She was rumored to have shot at more than one man, although not actually hitting anyone. Instead, her target was a small portion of the lower male anatomy. But she scared the hell out of everyone.

Unlike more famous contemporaries like Pearl Hart, who teamed up with Joe Boot to rob stagecoaches, Ma Grumbling did her best work at small frontier banks. Satisfied to take only a slim portion of the funds, she left the bank officials with the dilemma of whether or not to admit they had been robbed by a girl.

"Big Nose" Kate (Mary Katherine Haroney) hooked up with Doc Holiday and helped him escape jail by setting it on fire. But Ma Grumbling stayed on the fringes with the lesser-known contemporary criminals like Cactus Billy Budd and Sandy Smith. These gangs ranged over a vast territory and stayed out of sight of the few wanted posters tacked up in the frontier towns until that fateful day in 1911.

Ma saw a newspaper account of Laura Bullion, who ran with the Wild Bunch, including Butch and Sundance. The front-page article and the accompanying photogravure triggered envy and a thirst for notoriety that had not previously existed in Laura Mae's mind. She wanted her fifteen minutes of fame, or even more if she could get it. So she convinced the gang to rob the mail car on the Atchison, Topeka, and Santa Fe railroad. An audacious feat even for the more experienced gangs at that time.

Not willing to be shot by a woman where it would hurt the most, the gang finally agreed, and a plan was put in place.

Angus and Dougie MacNeish emigrated to the New World from the Scottish Highlands in 1908. Reluctant to give up a specific part of their homeland, they continued to wear traditional Highland garb, including kilts. Through their cousin, Bruce, they were introduced to Congressman Stuart Stewart. He assisted them in getting a job with the Post Office, and they were assigned to a mail car because their rugged build and fierce visage might curtail the current spate of robberies.

Ma Grumbling's plan was simple. She would board the A, T, & SF train at Sulphur Springs with her 1877 snub-nosed Colt .41 tucked into her handbag. She would knock on the mail car door and entice the occupants to open up. After threatening to shoot the clerks where it would hurt the most, Ma would throw the money bags out the side door for the gang on horseback then jump into the saddle on a horse led by Cactus Billy. They all would ride off into the sunset with a ton of loot.

Angus answered her knock and slid back the viewing panel. Ma blew him a kiss, and Angus recoiled from Ma's unflattering face. But this would be a long trip, and he willingly slid back the bolt, hoping for a bit of love.

Ma burst into the room with her gun held at a menacing downward angle. She froze at the sight of two men wearing short skirts, and Angus quickly disarmed her. The train outran the men on horseback, and Ma was arrested at the next whistle stop.

In court, Ma tried the defense first used by the outlaw Pearl Hart after her arrest for a stagecoach robbery in 1899. She said, "I do not consent to be tried under a law my sex had no voice in making."

It didn't work then, and it didn't work for Ma. Still, because she had four young children, Ma was given community service by Judge Harrison Lambert. This included weekly cleaning and polishing his new yellow Oldsmobile Aristocrat, of which he was so proud.