Liminal Imminence

The outside world was unknown to her, but she could see a glimpse of it through the window in his room. Because of the window’s placement, all Magdalena could see was the sky. It felt more alive to her than anyone else in the bunker. Gray, purple, blue, pink, orange; every color it took was beautiful. Then there was the rain. When it poured, it would play lovely music against the window. Those were the days she slept in her uncle’s assigned bed, and he would sleep in hers. Her uncle found the pounding against the window terrifying. He was always afraid the window would crash open one day and the air would kill him before anyone noticed. Meanwhile, Magdalena was just lulled to sleep by the symphony.

Sometimes, she would lay there for hours. She couldn’t see anything else in the Above, but her uncle would regale her with tales of the Before Times. Her uncle had passed them down to her, as his grandfather had to him. After all, they were the last two left in their family.

According to their ancestors, there was something called grass that coated the ground above them and large bodies of water that enveloped most of the planet. There were buildings that seemed to touch the sky (though, according to her great-grandfather, they truly didn’t). Animals (the things that sometimes resembled humans but didn’t always) roamed free and some were kept as “pets”. Crops grew in the ground, so people ate those instead of the synthetic supplements that composed their meals. Unfortunately, they all died in the Above with the rest of the population.

There were a few pictures from the Before Times in the bunker. They were commodities salvaged by some of the families during the Escape. But, now they were all gone. Burned after the last incident.

Up until a few weeks ago, there were other windows. It was said they were built by the original families to keep from going stir crazy. The Above was different and people from the Before Times weren’t used to cramped spaces. Though, many did go mad in the end. Of the thousand people that made it into the bunker, only seven hundred survived into the first year. There rest took their own lives. Those numbers dwindled for the first decade. However, as the next generations adjusted, the numbers began to increase again. They welcomed the new world, a world that kept them alive, and the windows became largely ignored by most. Then, they became a source of fear.

Magdalena was a toddler during the Incident, but her uncle had recollected it enough times. One of the Tinkerers became hysterical. In the shop, he ran towards the window, intent on smashing it open. Though other Tinkerers tried to stop him, his determination won. He smashed his entire body into the window. Everyone in vicinity died. If the air didn’t take them, then the acid rain. If not the rain, then the burning sun. That part of the bunker was abandoned. No one was willing to risk repairing it.

Since then, many had petitioned to do away with the windows. Her uncle was one of them. Magdalena kept quiet. At seventeen, no one valued her opinion. If she even mentioned her positive experiences with her uncle’s window, they called her fanciful. A child. They insisted she would grow out of it and one day understand the true danger of the windows. If she were older, they would have called her a heretic.

A month ago, the newest batch of Elders finally succeeded in the campaign against the windows. Magdalena watched in horror as they slowly cemented each one. They sealed all the windows in the common areas first. Then, the windows of the north side, the wealthier side. They slowly worked their way through their bunker. Her uncle’s was the last.

Magdalena wasn’t sure if this was a gift by from her uncle or if this was because they were the lowest in social status. Either way, she thought she would appreciate the chance to say goodbye. Instead, Magdalena was angry.

She didn’t want to say goodbye. She didn’t want to be trapped in this bunker forever. She didn’t even want to be a Tinkerer. Magdalena hated all those ours trapped in the bowels of the bunker, enveloped in darkness and dim lighting. A part of her was even angry at the unnamed Tinkerer from the Incident. However, she couldn’t quite form why.

There were times when Magdalena swore she saw things. At the corner of her eye, shapes would appear on the window. If everything was supposed to be dead, how could she see anything out there? Or was it just wishful thinking?

Did it matter?

The window would soon be gone. The sky would dull in her mind, until it faded away entirely. If she had a child, they would only be left with stories.

Magdalena took a deep breath. Longingly, she placed her palm against the window. The sky was beautiful today. Clear and blue. Magdalena exhaled with a sigh.

Then, she drove her first through the window.