Into The Deep

What did I get myself into this time? I’m on a boat rocking back and forth in the middle of the ocean all alone. I don’t have food, I don’t have water, all I have is the white light of the moon and the brightness of the stars shining down on me. I guess all things considered seeing the stars gleam and glow and the great round moon watching over me, isn’t a bad way to go. I just wish I could find some comfort on this wooden dinghy. The only thing I can rely on to sooth me is the water knocking up against the hull of the boat, but that’s only because it’s the least of my worries. I’m more worried about those thick clouds in the great distance, I’m not sure how well this boat would hold if it had to go up against swells bigger than me. But I guess that’s a concern for another day. I took a deep breath of the cool crisp air of the ocean breeze and let out nothing but anxiety and fear. I looked out into the water, clinched my left hand, placed it under my chin and just gazed upon the beautiful ocean water knowing full well that it will be my final resting place. I noticed my reflection in the water and all I see is despair. I sat there still and quiet contemplating how I got here, and then suddenly, I see a bright blue light gliding through the deep. It was twirling and spinning, what a peculiar fish I said to myself, at least someone was home. I was wondering what it could be, but I haven’t got a clue, all I know is it looked happy. Well, I guess I should try and get some sleep, those clouds look like I am going to need what little energy I can get.

I laid down inside my boat and just watched the stars above, through mere exhaustion my eyes were getting heavier and heavier, it was impossible to keep them open. After I had just closed my eyes, I felt a splash of cool water hit my face. It startled me because water should never be inside the boat. I frantically searched the boat for any intrusion of water. But I couldn’t find any. I was confused, am I deranged? Am I delirious? I must be because my face is soaked, and I don’t know why. And then, it happened again, a splash of water hit the back of my head. This time I look around in the water, maybe it’s a whale or maybe it’s a dolphin, but I don’t see a thing, all I see is my reflection. And all I see is a mad man, desperate and frightened hoping for an end to this lunacy. But I feel it’s just begun because that blue light is back, and its coming for me.

The blue light is ascending from the deep fast, the water is violently rippling and swaying the boat, almost knocking me off. I lost my balance and fell inside my boat and did my best to hold on to what little life I had left. And then it stopped. When the water calmed, and the boat wasn’t shaking so much, another splash of water hit my face. I paused because I was terrified to find out what’s out there waiting for me. I puckered my lips tasting nothing but the salt of the water. I then took one last breath knowing full well it may be my last. And, before me, was a woman with hair as black as midnight, and eyes as purple as violets, with a blue light glowing behind her looking at me with fascination. She was the blue light. I was speechless and couldn’t believe my eyes, why would a beautiful woman be in the middle of the ocean? It was a question I could not answer, now I am sure I have reached the brink of insanity. I looked in perplexing awe at this woman, who seemed to be thriving in this environment, while I am dying.

“Are you real?” I muttered.

The woman stroking the surface of the water with her hands, smiles and looks me in the eyes, and says nothing, she is silent and seems just as curious as I am.

I gathered more strength to speak. I said, “What’s your name?”

The woman smiles and says, “Aerwyna… what’s yours?”

“There’s no point in knowing, I am going to die soon, but if you must know my name is Francis.”

Aerwyna laughed. “Well Francis, it’s nice to meet you. But it seems like you need a little help.”

“That would be an understatement.” I looked up at Aerwyna in excitement. “Can you help?”

“It depends.” Said Aerwyna

I said in desperation, “On what?”

Aerwyna smiles and starts slowly swimming, circling around the boat. “It depends on what you would do with your life, if I save it.”

“What do you mean?”

“I think you know.” Aerwyna stopped swimming and looked at me. “Worth saving.”

Aerwyna then held out both her hands, her left hand held a blue light, and her right hand held a yellow light. She put her hands together as if she was praying and created a green light flaming with memories of my past. She then engulfed me in this green light and then suddenly, I saw black. It was silent. But I was at peace, I wasn’t happy or sad, I was in a void. Then unexpectedly I saw a great light blinding me, I don’t know why but I was crying, I was scared and cold. Then this beautiful voice came over me and embraced me with warmth and love.

This voice told me, “Everything will be okay.” And, then kissed me.

Then the green light forwarded to my first day of school, I was with my mother, and she was holding my hand, walking me to my first class, I never noticed until now that she never let go, until that very day.

She said with the most assuring smile on her face, “Everything will be okay.” And, then gave me a kiss.

The green light then shifted me to my last day of school. I remember the guest speaker at my graduation being very passionate about how we started off in our lives.

He said, “Each and every single one of you is destined for greatness and you should take charge in this world, and do great things, because we all have one shot at this, and this is that shot.”

At the time I thought what the guest speaker said was just a bunch of non-sense, but now hearing those words at the brink of death makes me feel like I could have done better. After the ceremony, I saw my mother was there to embrace me.

She gave me a kiss. And told me, “I love you and everything will be okay.”

Then the green light forwarded me to my first job, I saw myself working at a dull job working the cash register, getting yelled at by a customer. I looked miserable, but I was trying to act like I cared, I couldn’t understand why this person was yelling at me and why they were so mad. Then I was forwarded to the most painful memory I have. My mother in a hospital bed, looking at me with tears in her eyes and holding me. This time she didn’t say anything. That was the day she passed, that was the day I was never the same. I then woke up six in the morning, went back to work at the cash register, getting yelled at by customers, getting yelled at by my boss. Going home, watching television, going to sleep. This happened again and again, until I realized what Aerwyna meant. Aerwyna brought me back and the green light disappeared. Is my life worth saving?

Aerwyna said, “If I save your life are you going to go back and do nothing with your life?”

I went silent because I didn’t know the answer to her question.

Aerwyna said, “Or do you want a chance to live?”

I couldn’t say for sure, because I was afraid of living, I had done nothing with my life, I had no ambition or inspirations. I took no chances. I then heard three loud horns blast from a ship that was passing by. I saw the bow of the ship and the running light was red. It was my chance to be saved and get back to my life. But I don’t just want a life, I want to live.

I came as close as I could to Aerwyna. I said, “I want to take a chance.”

She put her arms around me. She told me, “Everything will be okay.”

She kissed my lips and took me into the deep.