Inevitable

The scraping of stone against the hard, dry surface of the earth makes the hairs on Phoenix's arm stand up; a learned response after their base had been discovered one too many times by, luckily, only the occasional pitiful scavenger. But it was too good of a spot to give up, so they chased any strangers away with their collection of weapons used to protect Briar. They let out a breath of relief once it becomes apparent that it’s only her, coming back from a foraging expedition.

The young woman lets out a heavy sigh and a grunt as she moves to replace the make-shift entrance. Phoenix watches her struggle with the large boulder, knowing she would only lash out if they attempted to help. She was growing more frail as the days became shorter and the temperature dropped aside from an occasional flash of warmth, and she hated it. Phoenix started picking up the slack for her, whenever they knew she wouldn’t become resentful, moreso toward herself than them. They can't help but feel a tinge of pain stir in their chest now as they see how disheveled she looks, dusty and bony, in the sliver of sunlight that shines through..

"Find anything good, Bri?" they ask instead, trying to distract from the sight of their weakening partner.

Briar hesitates before turning to face Phoenix. Tears well behind her eyes, but she manages to keep them at bay. Phoenix marvels at how strong she is - not in the conventional sense, but able to endure. "No," she says, her voice thin. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay. Maybe we can go out really early tomorrow. Before the sun, even. A creature might think it's safe to come out then. But we'll prove it wrong, right?" Phoenix grins, hoping to cheer Briar up.

Briar just nods and walks away, visibly distraught at her lack of success. There isn't anywhere for her to go, though, so she soon stops and lowers herself down against one of the stone walls. She lets out another heavy sigh, her focus shifting to the empty air in front of her. Her facial muscles relax as she becomes more distant.

Phoenix frowns. It feels like they're slowly losing her with every passing day, and have been for a while. All the two of them know is the world like it is now, where survival is only for the lucky; if there was ever a time where a sense of security and peace could be found, it was long forgotten or simply unknown. They know, though, that after so many years, fighting to live only wears one down. They don’t want to think about losing her, but it’s inevitable. They haven't heard of anyone who wasn't broken eventually. They were somehow still holding on, only by a thread, and it was all for Briar. Once she was gone, they would be, too.

Phoenix tentatively moves closer. "What are you thinking about?" Briar usually brushes them off when they ask this, but this time she takes her lower lip between her teeth. Eager, they kneel down in front of her and lean close.

Briar opens her mouth, but then shakes her head a moment later. "You'll think I'm being silly."

"I won't."

Briar exhales slowly and closes her eyes. "Okay. Do you ever feel...trapped?"

Phoenix lets out a sharp laugh - Of course I do. All the damn time. Briar's shoulders slope in defeat and she mumbles a quiet, "Never mind."

"No! No, hon, I'm sorry." Phoenix reaches out, squeezing her shoulder gently. "I'm not laughing at you. It's just...of course I feel trapped. This isn't a good world to be stuck in, but at least I'm in it with you." Briar's lips twitch upward momentarily and Phoenix feels pleased.

"I don't mean metaphorically. I mean literally."

Phoenix cocks their head. "What do you mean? Are you saying we're...what? Captured? By who? Or what?"

"I don't know." Briar begins tracing a finger over the ground in front of her, the patterns she’s attempting to make failing to imprint on the hard ground. "I've just been thinking about it a lot, and I like to think we're trapped inside something."

Phoenix takes a moment to let the idea sink in. "Why do you want that to be true?" they finally ask, unable to see the benefit.

"Because then at least that means there's more than this life, than this world. Even if we can't reach it, even if we never escape this container-. I like to think we're in a locket. Remember? Like in those pictures we found."

Phoenix does recall the grayed, barely held together photographs they ran across when searching through an abandoned structure a few years ago. Briar wanted to keep them, so she did until they finally became unrecognizable.

Still, Phoenix can visualize one of the women pictured. She was beautiful. "I wish I was her," Briar had said. Phoenix agreed, though not for the same reason. This woman looked healthy. She looked happy. She looked like she was thriving. She was proudly wearing a heart-shaped locket, showing it off - probably a gift. A luxury that couldn't be found today.

"I do," Phoenix murmurs. "But who would carry such destruction and misery with them like this? What kind of monster-?"

"No, it has to be someone who doesn't know,” Briar insists, a whining tone beginning to reflect in her voice.. “To them, we're just part of a beautiful locket, an item they treasure."

Phoenix scoffs. "It's funny how ignorance can be the reason suffering continues." Briar's brow furrows, and Phoenix knows they said the wrong thing. They shake their head in confusion; normally Briar was the pessimistic one. "Why do you think we're trapped in a locket?" they decide to ask, redirecting the conversation to keep from going down a path of upset.

Briar shrugs her shoulders. "It just makes sense to me."

"Care to elaborate? You gotta convince me, hon." Phoenix nudges Briar playfully, drawing a smile from her lips.

"Okay, okay. Um, well, when we get those heat waves that only last a few seconds, I like to think it's because fingers are holding us."

"That's a comforting thought." It is.

Briar nods. "And the whistling we hear sometimes when the sun is setting, what if that doesn't mean run? What if that means take a moment and listen, to understand the message of our holder?"

Phoenix grimaces. "I think it should mean run just in case." As nice as this fantasy sounds, they refuse to let Briar think she should risk her life unnecessarily.

Briar blows air between her lips, but she nods. "Yeah, I know. I'm just so tired of running," she whispers.

Phoenix crawls over to Briar’s side to wrap an arm around her, pulling her tight against them. "I know." They press a kiss to the top of her head. "Tell me more."

"The flashes of light-."

"Is the locket opening," Phoenix guesses.

"Yes!” Briar claps her hands together. “And sometimes, when I'm out hunting further away, I see streaks across the sky. It looks the same, Phoenix, every time. Curved, like the edges of the heart. Like an opening, too far away for me to reach. But maybe one day I can reach it. We can reach it."

Phoenix forces out a smile, even though Briar can't see it. They don't want to give credibility to these delusions, but the passion in Briar's voice, the hope - a rare occurrence - makes them reconsider. "And what would happen when we reach the opening?"

Briar seems to shrivel against Phoenix, suddenly deflating without warning. "You're just humoring me, aren't you?"

"What? No. I really want to know. Even if it's not reality, it's real to you. Your mind is a beautiful thing. It keeps me sane."

Briar hums, reaching up to grasp Phoenix's hand. "Then we'll pry the locket open and come face to face with another world. Larger than life, but so much better."

"If only." If only.

"Can we look for it, Phoenix?" Briar pleads, voice thick with hope. "Can we try to find the opening?"

Phoenix hesitates. "I don't want you to be disappointed if it isn't-. If we can't reach it."

"Then we'll keep going until we can." Briar squeezes their hand, causing Phoenix to inhale sharply. “We’ll just go and go and go until we can. And if we can’t, we’ll go some more.”

Phoenix pulls back, letting their eyes roam over their partner, nearly vibrating with excitement. They hadn’t seen her this exhilarated in a long time. It makes their heart soar, but then shudder to a stop as realization hits. I've lost her. Swallowing back the pain - it was inevitable - they give her a gentle smile, their pulse reluctantly starting back up again. "Yes, honey. We can search for it."

Briar's mouth splits into the widest grin Phoenix had ever seen from her. It was alarming. "Thank you! We'll start tomorrow morning." With a content sigh, Briar nestles further into Phoenix.

Phoenix tightens their grip on her as a silence falls over the two of them. They stare blankly into the air in front of them, feeling empty. They almost couldn't believe it. They had just agreed to leave their base, which had served them well for close to a year, to chase this non-existent opening. They were going to die out there, that much they knew. But the Briar they knew - sweet, sensible Briar - was gone, and now all that was left was for them to go, too.

As they sit in silence, their stomach closing in on itself with hunger and defeat, they can only hope that the monster holding them, if there is one, is showing their locket off proudly, like the woman in the picture that doesn't exist anymore.