Hot Chocolate and Cuban Cigar

I’ve never been one to stare at people. Not only did I find it awkward, I grew up fitting into the shell of disappointments, heartbreaks and missed opportunities. As confident and as proud as most people saw me, inside I was just a little girl who sought validation from whomever and would accept what crumbs were thrown my way like a dog who had not found purpose.

My mom had told tales of how still I held a room if I wanted it, no one competed for attention when I was in a place and I did it so effortlessly. It was the pitch of my voice, an eighth octave cricket, she’ll describe it. It was the rhythm of my feet which was actually no rhythm at all as I could never dance to save my life; yet I put on a show and had your attention and five-naira notes.

And when I told stories, it was the passionate wave with which my body swayed. Every character was brought to life, sharing an experience I only lived through television screens or adding the right amount of pepper and salt to the stories that were handed down to me. I’ve lived a charmed life, the center of attraction and thread that spins every party. Yet, I’ve never been one to stare at anyone; not even as a gossiping teenager or a young woman in love.

I’d admire people, give compliments but staring? Except I had to win an eye fight then I came blazing down, eyes burning as I stared down your soul to confession and submission. Only one blink as the chants of my name echoed on, I win! But that was a long time ago.

The shell that life builds, that shell called the comfort zone, somehow, I had grown to believe everything I heard from in there and there was no coming out for me; then came the day I did the routine that I had gotten so used to. However, I had an audience this time. They say responsibilities are the true test of a man’s character and I was given mine.

It was 6.40p.m and I was still basking in the euphoria of getting a standing ovation after what was said to be a stellar presentation, winning the contract bid that’ll put me in a position where I’m not just analyzing and someone else was taking credit but I’d finally get to share ideas and be credited for them. Speaking of credit, seven figure exhaling in my account had a nice ring to it. I mean, we all humbly applied for the job and when we were asked why we thought we were best fit for the position, we mumbled through that age old lie about being a Proactive and talented data analyst with over 10 years of experience assembling, directing and onboarding qualified teams of analysts for business development, strategizing and designing to successfully reduce employee turnover by 19% or working with a cutting-edge tech organization and building innovative products that would shape blah, blah, blah, when in reality, we wanted to actually say “well, we heard that tech was the new gold so we spent months, money and mental sanity pivoting through a new path to chop this money and live the baby girl life”

I was out with my regular friend (not the tech bros and sis), my balance bringer, my calm in chaos. Don’t get ahead of yourself, I’m a single pringle and judging from the last breakfast I was served, my stand that men are vermin, the very scum of the earth, has been reinforced. It was the bare-minimumming (sic) for me and at the ripe age of 29, there’s no way I’m eating crumbs and teaching you how to love me. You take my lessons, pass my tests then graduate and I’m left with a new student. No, this time, whenever this time comes, I’ll be the boss you take that knowledge and work for.

Anyways, Inedoubara is that cousin that has become my best friend and boy did he know how to rock that boat. Some times it looked like we were more than friends, other times it looked like we’d never speak again but our reality was that we had each other where we wanted each other, wherever that was. This would change with time, we had come to accept but as long as we had the power to, we’d be there. And that night he was.

He was waiting with that cheeky laughter to open the door of the car as I pulled into Option’s shouting “who dey!!!” Throwing out my long legs, I struggled to stand up straight as I laughed and pressed my face into his shoulder, punching his back in that playful way that I’ve gotten so used to. My mom would have scolded that I don’t injure somebody’s future husband and I would have sharply retorted, “who would marry this big fool?” But it was all love as I knew that any woman would be lucky to have this one for a few months, not to talk about a life time. I loved to call him by his full name because I appreciated the gift that he was to me. Inedoubara means “the way I want it” and it was obvious that I didn’t want it any other way. He’ll catch my worry some times and tell me that love sets free.

And it was the truth.

As we walked in, we talked about the presentation and it was like I was presenting to him again, like I had done earlier that week but this time, without the nerves. I also didn’t fail to add the pepper and salt that comes naturally with story telling but Inedoubara listened with rapt attention, cheering me on when the story was at its climax. He was always so easy to talk to. Soon we were stuffing our faces with seafood and red wine. Then the party started with shots of bourbon and extra company from the boys, Koko and Rufus. They were the three musketeers in secondary school till I joined their class in SS3, after leaving my all girls boarding school.

An aura of confidence like I hadn’t felt in last 15 years surrounded me and I felt like the human version of possibility. I had won a battle I didn’t realize I was fighting, rhythm found my feet and God, I danced. Inedoubara being the unpaid hype man was there to hype me to stupor and it was just the way I wanted it.

What a time to be alive, I plumbed into the upholstery. Eyes closed, taking in the sights and scene in my head and laughing at the god of impulsive buying as it suggested all my bad habits, marketing them in the sweetest temptations ever. I’d let my mind wander and mess with the idea of being that kind of girl. It was entertaining, and I wanted nothing more than to be amused at how far my mind could wander. I had earned it after all. I took another sip of my bourbon as the gods showed me the crystal-clear waters in Bali, I like it, I like it a lot!

What’s my imagination without hot chocolate and Cuban cigars? Throw that in the lot, make him Boris Kodjoe. Yes, I like it very much, I smiled to myself. First it was the weft of cigar, it was so pungent that I thought it had been blown in my face. This wasn’t how I liked to smell cigars. I liked them from a distance, mixed with whiskey and a husk of Hugo Boss’ Boss or Tom Ford Oud Wood. When I opened my eyes to ask Rufus not to smoke in my face, the gong had just been sounded for battle, the eyes…

He was the bad boy I imagined he would be. A hint of danger in the brown of his eyes and the beauty of Poseidon’s seas in the wave of his hair. He was the beauty they told you existed in simplicity in his attire. A native “senator” that beckoned to be peeled off his body… his body. An absolute show off of good genes and a healthy, blended lifestyle of food, rest and exercise, which might involve jumping off moving cars and carrying guns judging from that scar on his lips, but wasn’t it worth unraveling this mystery that has had me nonplussed?

I have never been one to stare at people but even though this was not an eye fight, I stared on. Adjusting my gaze as the lights caught my eyes but making sure that I didn’t blink, I watched as the puff of smoke left through his nostrils, then slowly from his mouth, I followed the smoke as they went round his eyes, creating a teary sea that threatened to wash off my sanity. It did not look like I needed any sense of reasoning at any rate.

I watched him rise, taking in every inch of his height that could have measured anywhere from 6ft7 to Zeus, yes. The gods indeed have come to dwell with men. Two strides from this gentle giant and he was at my table. “Laughter like that is contagious” was all I heard. The whistle went off in my head when he blinked and I heard the crowd chant my name… I had won, but I’d win something else tonight, I thought.

I took his hands in a warm handshake that was rather tender for someone I imagined killed for a living and he led me to the center of the dance floor. As if in synergy, the DJ switched to love in the club by Usher and I swayed my bone straight hair in agreement. The wave left from my hair, flowing through my upper body and as it got to my waist, he caught it and held on.

I bit my lower lip as the warmth in his hands travelled from my waist to my skin, sending a decent amount of shock to places I never knew I could feel shock. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling his face so close to mine that I could feel his lips slightly brush the tip of my nose. Shock waves. This man could electrocute me right here on this dance floor and my life would be over. All my carefully laid out plans were being thrown out for one weft of cigar and creed aventus. This is where I wanted to be, how I wanted it to be.

It didn’t come as a shock, realizing that my life depended on this dance as his hands drove my skirt up, bringing his bare hands to touch part of my naked thighs. It wasn’t special effect from the DJ, it was my voice in a moan as I turned my back to him, pressing the entire circumference of my Izon heritage into his groin and knowing that I wasn’t taking this trip alone. The DJ was in full fledge 2000s music and when R.Kelly asked, “would you wine for me” I snaked it all the way down and backed it up slowly, holding on to his neck for dear life.

Facing him again, I pulled him closer to my lips, this time I’d taste the scar on his lips. This time, I’d share what’s left of the cigarettes in his breath, this time, I’ll ride this wave till I’m home, nestled in his arms. I pulled him in, but that firmness of gods didn’t budge. I kept pulling till I heard Inedoubara say “Hey Deeddy, touch down!”

Just then, the announcements came in and everybody was in a hurry to get off the plane. “Bali” he said

I took my phone and checked my account balance… at least that part wasn’t a dream.