Hat Hunt

I dig into my dresser and toss my clothes around my room. My sweaters, pants, and sheets are spread on my floor like blood on a battlefield. I turn to my bed and rip all the sheets off at once, but there’s still no sign of it. What a great start to my morning.

I force my closet door open and scour it from bottom to top, but I still can’t find it. There are only tacky dresses and ugly stuffed animals that make me feel self-conscious.

I really need to update my wardrobe.

“Harry, have you seen my hat? I can’t find it anywhere,” I yell. Harry doesn’t respond. Maybe he isn’t awake yet. He’s always been one to sleep in.

I move over to my dresser and toss my plushies off one by one.

“Sorry Mr. Chootums, excuse me Mrs. Chootums. Move Eddy, you’re in the way!” They all fly onto the bed or the floor, but once the dresser’s clear, there’s still no sign of my hat. “Oh my god! Where did I put it?”

I stumble over all my junk and barge out of my room.

“Harry? Harry, are you awake? I need your help.” Still no answer.

My hat has to be somewhere in the apartment. Normally, I bring it to my room, but I can’t find it anywhere in there, and Harry is too busy sleeping in my time of need.

I walk down the hall, trying to think of where my hat could be. Once I reach the living room, that’s when the thought hits me.

It could be on the coat hanger! Why am I hanging my hat on a coat hanger? Man, I’m such an idiot.

I walk to the front door and check the coat hanger, and I still don’t see my hat. I take off one coat, then another, and another. Nothing.

I throw them on the floor and throw off the rest of the coats. Not a single hat in sight.

I dig my hands into the pile of coat corpses, trying to find my hat within the gore.

“Harry, wake up. I need your help!”

I dart into the living room and rip the cushions off the couch. All I find are the innards of old leather.

“Where could my hat be…”

Okay, calm down Dreda. I just need to retrace my steps from yesterday, and I’ll find my hat in no time.

“Okay. So, I got home from work late yesterday, and I was really tired…” I dart to my front door. “I came in feeling half asleep, then I think I saw Harry, and he went off to bed. Then I started walking to my room… but then I got hungry.”

I run to the kitchen before I lose my train of thought.

“Since I was tired, I wanted to eat something that needed no prep.” I dash around, swinging cupboard doors open. “Oatmeal requires cooking, frozen dinner requires waiting. Oh. I remember it was cereal!”

I bend down and swing the cupboard door into my face, but the pain is worth it for my hat. “I ate Vitabites!” I take the bag of cereal out of the box and inspect inside of it.

Not even the tiniest sign of my hat. “Oh, come on! Where could my hat be?”

With my trail running cold, I dig my hands into the cereal bag, shoving a handful into my mouth.

Wait! Maybe if I eat the cereal, it’ll jog my memory.

I stand to my feet and grab a bowl and spoon out of the dish drainer. I launch myself into the dining chair and force the cereal out of the bag. I take my spoon and cram it into the cereal, causing some of it to spill out. I take a bite, but I can’t help feeling that something’s missing.

“This cereal needs some pizzazz.” I raise my hand above the cereal bowl and close my eyes. I focus on my fingertips and start rubbing them together.

“Oh, great god of sugar, let my cereal be blessed with the sweetest toxins that this world has to offer!” I open my eyes and see bright white sprinkles drizzle out of my hand.

“Thank you, great sugar god, for blessing me with this gift. I thank you once and a thousand times more.”

I start rubbing my fingers together even faster than I was before, having too much fun with what I’m doing.

Suddenly, a big poof of white explodes into my face, as the sound of glistening echo’s in my ear. I drag my hands across my face and see the white powder scattered across the table. Some of it is even on the floor.

“Great, now I’ve gotta clean all this up. I guess my hats gotta wait then…”

I ball my hands into fists, sticking my pointer fingers out of them. I start spinning them around, and the white sprinkles begin to return to my fingertips. One by one.

Why does my magic explode in my face so easily, but when I have to clean it up it takes forever? It’s literally magic! It should all be gone with the snap of my finger. Maybe I just need more practice, or I’m just that lame.

As my twirling starts to hurt my wrists, I flip my hands around and start snapping.

“Come on! Get rid of this stuff.” I snap my fingers like I’m trying to start a fire with flint. “Come on, work!”

No matter how many times I snap, the sprinkles don’t go anywhere.

Forget it. I’ll just grab the broom. Maybe if I sweep up the sprinkles, I can sweep up my failures too.

I push myself away from the table and get out of the chair. As I’m walking, I see Harry make his way into the kitchen.

“Oh hey, Harry. I see you’re finally awake.”

Harry twitches his nose as he looks around the kitchen.

“Yeah, it’s my bad.”

Harry turns to me as his nose twitches faster.

“Alright, relax. You don’t see me grabbing the broom? Jesus Christ. Some magical sparkles aren’t gonna kill you.”

I grab the broom, but Harry quickly jumps in front of me.

“What’re you doing? Don’t you see me trying to clean up my mess?”

Harry jumps up and down in place.

“Yeah, I know it’s not magical to sweep, but I need to clean this up quick. I’ve lost my hat and it’s really bumming me out.”

Harry stands on his hind legs.

“Stop that! You know I feel bad when you do this.”

Harry doubles down and keeps standing.

“Oh my god, fine. I’ll do it the correct way since you wanna be here all day.”

Harry gets off his hind legs.

“Remind me to find some less manipulative friends.”

I let go of the broom and ball my hands into fists, shooting my pointer fingers out. I start twirling them and the sprinkles start floating to my fingertips one by one, again.

“You see how slow this is? Just let me use the broom like a normal person.”

Harry starts hopping around in front of me.

“I am twirling my fingers. How else am I supposed to twirl my fingers?”

Harry starts shaking his head sideways.

“I’m twirling my hands, not my fingers? What’s the difference?”

Harry starts jumping high enough to reach my hand.

“Alright, I’ll stop moving my hands, jeez.”

I stop moving my hands and take a deep breath. I eyeball my pointer fingers, making sure that they’re the only part of my body that’s moving.

The white sprinkles start coming to me in clumps. Soon, they start coming fast enough to create a glowing stream of white in the kitchen.

“Oh, wow. I’m glad I realized this all on my own. Good job me!”

Harry hops on my ankle and starts pushing me.

“Oh relax, you know I’m joking.”

Before I know it, the kitchen is spotless, putting me at ease. Before I can take a step forward, Harry hops back in front of me.

“Man, what is it now?”

Harry twitches his nose slightly.

“Nonsense? What do you mean nonsense?”

Harry jumps.

“Oh, you heard what I was saying about the sugar god? You know I only say that to help motivate me, so stop calling it nonsense.”

Harry jumps twice as high as he did before.

“Yes, I know there’s no sugar god, and I know I really shouldn’t be sprinkling this stuff on food cause it may or may not be edible, but it probably is cause it tastes sweet, but it should be fine because I add it to stuff all the time and I’m not dead. yet…”

Harry lunges at my ankle and starts biting me.

“Okay, I get it! I’ll stop with the sugar god stuff.”

Harry stops and jumps in front of me.

“But on a much more important note, have you seen my hat anywhere? I’m gonna need it for a show tonight.”

Harry hops out of the kitchen and into the living room. I follow him and he hops all the way into the hallway, stopping at the door to his room. He crawls into the hole at the bottom of his door. Once he’s in, I open the door and enter.

Harry hops into his house-shaped hutch and hops back out, holding my hat in his mouth. He drops it in front of me and twitches his nose.

“Oh thanks, Harry! I really appreciate you holding onto my stuff for me. I was so tired that I barely remember taking it off.”

I bend down and grab my hat. The white cotton melts into my fingers as I brush it down with my hand.

“Oh, I missed you so much my adorable little bunny beanie! I’m sorry for throwing you off my head without care. You know your adorable little bunny ears mean the world to me!”

I wrap my hat in a hug and put it back on my head.

“Again, thanks, Harry. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Harry relaxes his ears.

“I mean it. You’re the coolest roommate a girl could ask for.”

Harry rotates his ears slightly.

“Yeah… you noticed huh?”

Harry perks himself up on his forelegs.

“I’m not surprised you did. You know me too well. The reason why I was so tired yesterday was because the show didn’t go so great.”

Harry rests his forelegs as he twitches his nose.

“I’m sorry, but I don’t think I wanna talk about it today.”

Harry perks up his ears.

“Oh, are you sure you wanna hear it? You’ve got work tomorrow and I don’t wanna vent to you on your day off.”

Harry nods his head.

“Well, if you say so.” I sit down on the floor and cross my legs. “So, I was at this kid's birthday party, and I was doing my usual tricks, right, my little mini sparkle bursts, my dazzle, and spin, all the things that normally knock the kids dead, right? I’m getting a bunch of cheers from everyone, even from the adults. But Aisha, the birthday girl, walks up to me with this bored look on her face, and asks me ‘When are you gonna start doing some real magic tricks?’”

Harry quickly picks his head up.

“I know right? She says that to me, and I kinda give her this look, but then her mom comes up like ‘Oh, you have even better tricks for us? I can’t wait to see!’ and she says it super loud, so all the other kids start to get riled up, and a few of their parents too. They all get hype super-fast, so I have no choice but to play along, and I need you to understand that I already pulled out my crazy moves too. Glitter Tornado, Sparkle Shot, and even Moonlight! All of my handcrafted showstoppers and Aisha had the audacity to ask me that!”

Harry sets his head down.

“So, since everyone was all hype, I doubled down, 'cause again, what choice did I have? I did another couple Sparkle Shots and Moonlights, and no matter how many I did, that stupid little girl wasn’t impressed, and I was trying to satisfy her because her parents were loaded! I can impress the parents all I want, but when you impress their kids, they throw in an extra couple hundred in the payment.”

Harry picks his head back up.

“I mean, I got the extra money because I was a human fireworks festival, but that one stupid little girl was never satisfied, no matter how much I showed off.”

Harry tilts his ears.

“Yeah, I know I shouldn’t be caught up on one person’s reaction, but what if everyone starts to react to my tricks that way? What if my whole thing gets old to people?”

Harry perks his ears up and hops into my lap. He crawls over my leg, trying to reach for my hand.

“Well, you’re definitely right about that. I’ve never seen anyone else do what I can do.”

Harry hops out of my lap and presses his forelegs onto my hand.

“Yeah, you’re right, Harry. I’ve worked hard to get where I am with my tricks, and you’ve always helped me out of my creative ruts.”

Harry sits his whole body on my hand.

“I know I should have more confidence in myself, but it almost feels like paranoia keeps me in check, you know? But being paranoid forever will only make me go crazy though.”

Harry hops off my hand and hops in front of me. He twitches his nose slowly, letting his words sink.

“Oh, you mean that,” I grab Harry and lift him above my head. “You’re not too bad yourself, you know. You can be annoying sometimes, but you always do your best to support me.”

Harry starts cycling his feet in the air.

“Oh, my bad. Picking you up makes you feel like a child, I forgot.” I put Harry down and he scurries into his hutch. He pops his head out the front door once he settles in.

“Well, I’ll be seeing you, Harry. I gotta practice some tricks for tonight’s party. I want to make sure that I knock everyone dead, including any kids that refuse to be impressed by me.

Harry drops his ears.

“You idiot, I’m not actually gonna kill anybody.” I stand up and make my way to Harry’s door. “And I meant what I said. I’m really happy to have you as a roommate.” I leave his room and close the door behind me. I adjust my hat and walk to my room.

I can’t doubt myself for a second. I’m a one-of-a-kind girl with a one-of-a-kind talent, and no one’s ever gonna be able to take that away from me.