Giraffe Slide

Eight feet looking down at sparkling yellow under the sun while I stand at the top of the climb from a tail ladder. The giraffe neck slide in the Merriweather zoo was where I loved to look out over all of the exhibits. The joyful place I was first taken as an excited little kid. The playground here is animal themed with a giant giraffe slide, koala seesaw, cheetah zip line, and monkey swings. Many adults like me still come to slide down the giant slide that many children have to build the courage to fly down. There are other smaller slides here like the duck bill and frog lily pad slide that are about three and five feet, but nothing can beat getting to slip down the neck of a giraffe, something that was usually only possible in cartoons.

“If only those people could come and slide down my neck,” I heard from behind me. I turned around ready to talk to whoever was striking up the conversation, but saw no one who was looking in my direction. “Why doesn’t the human who is now looking this way come to slide down my neck?”

“Excuse me?” I walk up to the giraffe exhibit that is right beside the playground to look over the one that is staring right down at me with its towering presence.

“Yeah see, come climb up here,” the giraffe had its head down in anticipation. It reached his long neck stretching towards me. “Oh wait, you climb up from the tail, right?” The giraffe then turned around and displayed his backside.

“I am pretty sure that only the zookeepers can come into the cages,” I responded, looking around to see if anyone thought I was crazy for replying to the animals. No one really seemed to care. Zoo visitors talked to all of the animals around here with their baby talk voices asking, “Do you really throw your poop around like a food fight?” at the monkeys.

“Well, find a way to become a zookeeper or sneak in here,” it replied while turning back towards my way again.

“I would need an animal behavior studies degree and that would take quite a while.”

It twisted its neck in sadness and replied, “You humans and your degrees.”

“Hey, not like I created that system. Someone thought it was a great idea and here we are. Maybe if they knew I could speak to giraffes they would let me in,” I shook my head while looking between the giraffe and the slide.

“You somehow hear the low frequency from me that most humans cannot pick up. My name is Champ by the way.”

“Champ. What a nice name. I’m Perry. Even if I could get in there, I am not so sure I could slide down your neck so well. The side is cupping people in from the sides to keep them from flying off,” I position my hands into a cupping motion.

“Then find a way to turn me into a slide. It is my dream to be like the one over there the people get to laugh and have fun with.”

“I see… I guess it would be pretty upsetting to always see people play why you stand within reach of them. I will go and find a way to sneak in here and hook plastic molds to you. Would actually be fun to sneak in here to show people you are a slide now. This could get me arrested, but here we go,” I ran to the store to find the right type of plastic with some hooks for the giraffe harnesses (actually dog harnesses) and waited in the night to be able to build onto the animal. When all was dark and silent, I climbed the fence. I suited up Champ in the middle of the night and waited until morning for people to trickle through the ticket booth.

“Why does that giraffe have all of that on him?” a kid asked. I then came forward to climb onto Champ and slid down his neck and while pointing to the slide across the way. “He made a real giraffe slide! I want to do that!” The kid jumped while still holding onto his mother’s hand.

“No, it is dangerous. He is probably an animal performer that is here today,” the kid’s mom warned.

“What? I thought the performer was for next week and they were supposed to do something with elephants,” one of the zoo workers checked their schedule.

“Oh excuse me. I must have gotten it wrong. Sorry,” I apologized.

“Oh well, you can carry on with it but we will have to move you to the performance area,” they opened the cage and led us into the performance area where people followed behind in excitement to see what was about to happen with Champ’s new contraption. I slid down Champ all day and was tired but fulfilled by the end of it.

Champ’s eyes shone bright as he said his goodbyes to me when I was taking off the slide contraption, “If only I could do that again.”,

“Well Champ, looks like I am going to hire some people and become a giraffe performer. Those people that were actually supposed to be here were called but automatically let me in their group. We will have to come up with something else to do too, whatever would be fun for you. We will of course be known as the slide duo with inspiration from this particular zoo. This work will be such fun, making my childhood happiness of coming here and sliding on the giraffe slide into an adult reality.”

“Wow, those people weren’t mad at all. We will be working together from now on?” Champ wondered, pulling his head down to me with his long neck.

“They were upset at first but thrilled later. We have more time together to come. Thanks for being such a Champ today,” I patted his head and smiled at the inspiration still sitting on the playground.