Forgetting again and again

Running has never been my thing but when you’re running for your life. Well, it changes you.

I’m at the back of my group, my friends ahead of me, Billie was the leader but Misty ran ahead of everyone looking for somewhere for us to hide. I turn to Toby who was helping Jessica keep moving forward, both mentally and physically, whatever they injected them with must be taking over, unable to speak anymore.

“Guys in here,” Misty yelled which earned him a smack in the head by Billie.

“Shhhhh! You don’t want to attract anyone.” She said as we all walked through the rubble into a building.

“Jessica sit down here.” Toby sat them down and held them as they started to cry.

“Don’t worry, we’ll figure something out, I’m sure of it,” Billie said and Misty nodded. I just stood there unsure.

“I’ll do patrol tonight,” Misty said, a gun in hand. “We can switch halfway. “Billie replied.

Toby nodded and Jessica said nothing, obviously exhausted.

“Let’s all get some shut-eye.” I turned to Toby and Jessica. “Stay close and Misty will wake Billie up when it’s her time to be lookout.”

We found some dirty sheets and I ripped a curtain from the wall and used that as a blanket. “Goodnight y’all.” I put my hat next to me and went to sleep.

“-MY GOD!” I’m startled awake, Misty shaking me vigorously. It’s still dark outside and I can barely see Misty.

“It’s Jessica!” That’s all she had to say as I get up and look around, just being able to make out three shapes on the other side of the room, Misty and I run over to them, Toby holding Jessica in his arms, tears leaking down his cheeks as Billie sniffs, tears running down her face as well.

I look over to Jessica again, their lifeless body, pale and unmoving, I see a massive cut, deep across their neck and very jagged.

“I don’t know what happened! I was coming back inside to wake up Billie and they were lying face down.” Misty burst out crying, I rubbed his back. “No ones blaming you Misty, did you see anything else? Anyone else?”

“No, not even a weapon.” He mumbled. I sudden jolt came to me and I held my head, my eyes widen and I look over to my left, I drop my hand from Misty’s back and walk over to a fallen shelf, there’s a small trail of blood leading to a piece of wood, I lift the wood up and underneath is a piece of glass, jagged and covered in blood.

I gasp, stepping back as Misty comes over here. “What? What is it?” He sees the blood trail and her eyes widen. “Billie! Toby!” Billie looks up and gets up, leaving Toby and Jessica and coming over to us.

“What did you guys fi- OH.” She crouches down and observes the glass. “Do you think they hurt themselves and threw the glass away?” I asked, something about this felt weird.

“That could have happened, just like Tahleeah.” Billie closes her eyes and I think back to our other friend that passed, we found her in a lake after losing her the night before, there’s has a nasty gash to her head and wire around her neck. I reach into my pocket and bring out the broken locket, it was heart-shaped and had a picture of her family, if I ever see them again I’ll be sure to give it to them though I doubt they’re still alive, it’s the least I could do.

“We have to keep moving.” I remind them, Misty ate the last of our food so we have to go scavenging again.

“Toby are you okay?” I turn to him, he looks down at Jessica and slowly nods his head. Getting up with them in his arms. “We can’t just leave them here!” Toby yells. “We can’t take them with us!” Misty replies.

“The least we can do is put them somewhere safe, until then they stay with us.” Billie smiles, you can see the dried up tears on her cheeks.

Toby nods and we head out, Toby carrying Jessica. Misty in front, as usual, everything is calm until a shot rings out, a bullet just missing my head. We all turn around and behind us, we see three people, they’re dirty and one has a gun, the other one has a bat and the other ones holding a chainsaw, they look disorientated like they’re confused. The one with the gun looked directly at me, I can see the fear and sadness in his eyes, he raises the gun again and shoots, I see the bullet go towards Billie and I push her out of the way falling to the ground. “Run!” Misty yells and we all run, Toby behind us as another shot is fired, this time hitting Toby in the leg.

“Toby!” I yell and run towards him but another shot comes, missing me.

“Let go of Jessica! We have to run fast!” Misty yells. Toby looks behind him as the three people ascend on him, you can see their faces like they want to scream but something is preventing them.

Toby looks at them, looks at us then looks at Jessica and smiles. “No...” Toby whispers. “You guys run! Run now!” He yells and I hesitate, then Billie grabs my arm and we’re running again as Toby hugs Jessica close, I can hear another shot and then silence.

I don’t know how long we ran but end up in a rundown gas station, looks like it’s already been raided so Misty searches for any leftover food and drink, we all put on a brave face though I know inside we’re all heartbroken, we’ve lost three people already, the locket feels heavy in my pocket and a rush of guilt overcomes me, but why? This isn’t my fault. I shake it off, I had more important things to focus on, like staying alive.

“I’ve found a few bars and two bottles of water.” Misty’s says as she walks to us.

“Thanks, Misty.” Billie takes the bars and water and puts them in her bag. “This will have to do, for now, we need to head out.” Misty and I nod and we walk out and head left, not knowing where we’re going but we just needed to keep moving.

We walk into another abandoned building, no signs of life, I look out a window, the sun is going down. “I’ll be on the lookout tonight.” I turn to them, Billie giving me the gun out of her bag. “It’s been a big day, get some rest, I’ll wake one of you if I need it.” They just nod, exhaustion clear on their faces. We look for something to use as a blanket, we find a couch and a small quilt upstairs which we give to Misty and Billie takes the floor with a dirty sheet as a blanket. “Goodnight Billie, goodnight Misty!” “Goodnight.” I heard them both say as I turned around and waited, what for? I wasn’t sure.

I slowly open my eyes, my vision blurry, I can make out a figure under me, I blink a few times and my vision clear.

I gasp and get up in horror, there lies Billie, a clean bullet hole in the head, I tried to scream for Misty but I couldn’t, instead, a shock went through me and I suddenly got up, my body moving on its own.

I pick up Billie’s body, my consciousness fleeing, suddenly I blackout.

“azz... Mazz!” I feel a kick to my side and I wake up. I look at Misty who has a worried look on his face. I turn and see that the sun is rising.

“Have you seen Billie?” I turn back to him. “I-I haven’t,” I reply, my eyes squinting as I try to remember. “She went to sleep pretty fast, maybe she got up early to look for more food?” Misty nods but looks uncertain.

I get up and pat Misty on the back. “I’m sure she’s fine, there’s a reason we made her our leader.” I give Misty a small smile which he returns, as he turns away my smile falters, where did Billie go? It’s not like her to leave us, I feel like I’m missing something but I look up at Misty and take in a deep breath.

“Should we wait for her?” Misty asks, he’s put billies bag on and is looking at me. “Uuuh, no.” I don’t know why but I feel like waiting would be pointless. “Well just keep going straight ahead, Billie’s smart so I’m sure she’ll figure it out.” Misty gives me a slow nod and we both head off.

As the day progressed it got hotter, Misty has already taken off her top and kept her singlet on, I’m not feeling that hot which is... weird though I am usually cold so it must be that.

“These parts look less beat up,” Misty says and I look around, it does look less beat up, some of the buildings are still standing, we might be able to find others, others that aren’t trying to kill us.

“I feel like we’re gonna make it.” I turn to Misty. “We should find a working car around these parts.” We’ve found a few cars on our journey but they were all busted.

As the day went to night it got cooler. We’re in one of the buildings and we’ve found more food. “Billie’s going to be happy when we show her all this food we found.” Misty smiles at the crackers he found in the top cabinet.

“Haha yeah...” I turn my face away so Misty can’t see my frown. We leave the building after eating and have a drink of water.

“Hey, there’s a car.” Misty points ahead of us, there’s a car there so we head over to it. “The keys are still inside!” That’s... convenient.

“I’ll drive,” I say as I get into the driver's seat, Misty doesn’t know how to drive anyway, I at least got my Ls.

“We could drive around for Billie,” Misty says as I turn on the headlights, it’s gotten darker.

“Yeah... let’s find Bil-.” A shock runs through me which makes me swerve the car a little bit.

“Mazz are you okay?” Misty looks over at me and gasps. “Mazz!” I try and tell her that somethings wrong but I can’t, I lock the doors and Misty gasps in horror, suddenly I swerve the car completely, I hear Misty scream, I scream in my mind as I drive us into a tree, just before we hit it my mind goes blank.

I jolt up, the suns out and I blink, adjusting to the light. “Misty are you okay?” I turn to her and my eyes widen. He’s bloody, his face smashed against the glass, dried blood on the glass and dashboard.

“No... NO!” I undo my seatbelt and reach over to him, moving his face away from the glass, there’s glass covering the left side of his face, cuts everywhere with dried blood. I start to hyperventilate, something isn’t right, we were driving, we were driving and... I can’t remember! Why can’t I remember, my mind starts flashing, I grip my head, flashbacks are repeating, I see my hands yanking wire around Tahleeahs throat, crying, I see my hands cutting Jessica’s neck, crying, someone’s telling me they’re not good enough so they must go, same with Jessica, same with Billie, Toby and Misty. My eyes widen, that’s why the man didn’t shoot me, that’s why he missed. Because someone told him to.

“Good work.” My body jolts and moves on its own, I get out of the car. “You’ve completed your task, but there’s more we need you to do, let’s go.” I look back at the car, back at Misty’s body laying there and I see the locket around his neck, terror in my eyes, I open my mouth but nothing comes out as I walk off tears streaming, knowing I’ll forget everything again and again and again.