Chosen Roots

There weren't always dragons in the Valley.

Willow waited to feel the familiar tingling sensation in her chest each time she reread the first line in one of her favorite books, "The Blue Dragons." Usually, she could quickly disappear into the pages and leave this world behind when she read that book. A few words would transport her from her reality into a 200-plus page fantasy. That is what she desperately needed at that moment, but the feeling wouldn't come. Instead, her reality was latched on with what felt like an unbreakable grip, and she couldn't get it off.

Willow wanted to envision herself showing up as the hero like Sir Jackson, who tames the dragons in the story, someone extraordinary. But now that she had the chance to become just that, all she felt was fear and shame. Willow didn't understand how something that she imagined feeling so good made her feel like there was a pit in her stomach. So, in another attempt to distract herself, Willow reread the first line.

There weren't always dragons in the Valley.

This time she closed her eyes after reading the line. She inhaled deeply, trying her best to mentally transport herself to the Valley where the blue dragons dwelled. But when she closed her eyes, nothing changed. She could see her mother and Nana Ruth's face, and then she saw her brother, RJ. Willow opened her eyes before her mind could show her the last day she saw him. She couldn't bear it. When Willow opened her eyes, she was relieved to find she was still in the guest room at her Nana Ruth's house. She retreated here after the "talk" in the kitchen. Willow planned to continue to hide in the room with the door locked and hope that everyone would forget what was discussed.

"You have been chosen for the power," echoed in her mind.

If it had been two years ago, right after the first time she read "The Last Blue Dragons," Willow probably would've been ecstatic and ready to accept this so-called "gift." But that was before she lost her brother. Before the reality that life isn't perfect rammed into her. Being told that her family has a magical legacy didn't feel like she thought it would. After what happened, it all felt like a sick joke. Willow's thoughts were interrupted by two slow knocks at the door, and Willow knew it was her father.

"I'm okay, Dad," she said and hoped he would believe her.

"Come see me in the study when you're ready. I want to show you something," Willow's father replied.

He waited outside her door for a moment before slowly descending the hall. Willow sank into the pillow on her bed. She didn't know what he could want to show her. What more could her family throw at her on this crazy day, no crazy year. Since the passing of her brother, it had been one thing after the other, and Willow couldn't help but feel like she was drowning.

Willow saw her mother's face and Nana Ruth flash in her mind. She could still see them vividly as they sat across from her at the kitchen table earlier that day. Neither of them said anything for a long while. Nana Ruth had a blank expression with her hands folded over the table. She glanced at Willow's mother, Celeste, who was looking at anything in the room other than her daughter. Willow shifted in her seat, not knowing what they wanted to talk about and trying not to fill the deafening silence with memories of RJ.

Celeste cleared her throat just before Willow could get too deep into thought. Thankful, Willow leaned in and smiled at her mother. She was trying to signal to her that it was okay to talk.

"You have been chosen, Willow," she finally said.

Willow didn't understand. She wasn't sure what she had been chosen to do. She observed her mother and grandmother, and then a thought occurred to her that made her want to evaporate. Did her mother mean chosen for womanhood? Willow had unexpectedly begun her first period on the drive down to Edgefield, where Nana Ruth lived. She knew the natural phenomenon was a surprise for everyone. Still, Willow never imagined it would become such an ordeal that required a weird woman-to-woman initiation. Her newly found womanhood wasn't precisely what she was looking forward to discussing with her mom and Nana Ruth. If involuntarily bleeding once a month meant she was a woman, then Willow was disappointed. Another unwanted thing in life for her to grapple with.

"Mom, I know periods are important, and I'm like a woman now, but this isn't really something I want to talk about."

Her comment seemed to offer her mother some peace of mind. Celeste finally wiped away her dreary expression and smiled.

"Willow, baby, I am not talking about your period. That is normal, nothing to be ashamed of, and unfortunately, something you will have to deal with for quite some time."

"But not forever," Nana Ruth chimed in with a wink.

"So if we aren't talking about… that," Willow shifted again, "Then what did you mean by chosen?"

Celeste looked at Willow directly and tried her best to hold her tears.

"Umm, I don't know how to explain it to you," she said.

"Start from the beginning," Nana Ruth added and placed a hand on Celeste's shoulder.

Celeste nodded, "You have been chosen for the power."

Celeste fell into a story about a woman who came to America by boat. This woman would've been Willow's many times over great grandmother, who everyone called Mama.

"Back where Mama was from, the people believed that energy never dies, and so they learned ways to use this energy."

Celeste explained how these ways originally started as small things, for example, being able to predict minor things and interpret dreams. Or the ability to ward off certain events and aliments and attract more positive situations.

"We call that root now," Nana Ruth said.

"There came a time when our people needed something a little stronger than root to survive," Celeste said.

She explained how a collective decision was made when Mama and her people were captured and placed on a ship.

"They believed that power came from our ancestors. Those who have walked this earth before us."

Mama and her people decided to make a significant sacrifice on the ship. In exchange for their offering, the ancestors would give a large amount of energy to one person. That person would be able to harness the ancestral power and help the others. More than half the people on the ship decided to sacrifice themselves to the sea. In the wake of their sacrifice, something much greater came.

"We call it Eyne," Nana Ruth said.

"Everyone," Celeste added.

The power of the sacrifice was imbued into Mama. She used that power to help her people through the trials that were to come. Some people said she crashed their ship and parted the sea for her people to travel through like Moses. Celeste studied the confusion on Willow's face.

"Using Eyne gives you a greater connection to the earth and its energy. Ma has told me stories about women in our lineage who have been able to manipulate the elements and predict the future."

Since Mama, that power has only been passed down to specific women in Willow's family bloodline. Eyne takes a toll on the body and mind and could only be passed on to those the ancestors felt would use it best. And now, that long line of ancestral magic had chosen Willow.

"But you don't have to accept it," Celeste said, taking Willow's hand, "it's a choice. You don't have to take this gift if you don't want to. You can still go to college and have a normal life."

A creaking floorboard brought Willow's attention back to the present. She rolled over in the bed to face the open window. Willow questioned what normal meant to her now. She didn't think there was such a thing after everything she had experienced. Who could view their life as normal after losing their best friend and only brother? What was normal about learning she could take a power that would open up a world Willow always wanted to be in? A world where maybe she could've saved her brother if she had been chosen for this great power just six months earlier.

Willow wiped a tear away from her eye before it could travel down her face. Crying wouldn't change any of that. She decided to accept that none of this was normal, and her life probably never would be. Willow also settled that she didn't want a power that didn't choose to help her when it mattered most.

Willow got out of the bed and went towards the bedroom door. She didn't realize how late it was until she emerged from her room. All the lights in the house were out, and the moonlight filled in the cracks of the house. Willow traveled down the hall with quiet steps. She passed the room where her parents were staying and found only her mother in the bed. Then Willow remembered her father had asked her to meet him in the study. Willow continued down the stairs and around the corner towards the back of the house. There she could see the glow of the lamp in the study. Her father waited up for her. Just as she neared the door, the light went out, accompanied by the sound of breaking glass. Willow hesitated for a moment, unsure of what to do, but she ran in when she heard her father's muffled shouts. It was too late. When Willow arrived in the study, she could see the frame of her father's body flying out the window that sat in front of the desk. Someone or something was dragging him quickly across the yard and into the grassy fields surrounding the house. Willow ran to the window and shouted after her father.

"DADDY!"