Breaking News

Warning: This short piece is discussing a topic that may be difficult for some to read about, reader discretion is advised.

I heard the news today. An ache spread through my chest as the broadcaster spoke about the incident. At this time there have been a confirmed six fatalities from this shooting, locals have stated they could hear the gunshots and the sound of children screaming.

I felt ill. There was a loud ringing in my ears that took the place of the broadcaster's voice. My mind wandered to the families. What would I do if I received that call? The call. I got to my feet and made my way to my daughter's room. I pushed open the door just enough for the light from the hallway to illuminate her face. She lay there in bed sound asleep. Completely unaware of what horrors children close in age to her had faced that day.

I crept quietly into the room and knelt by her bedside. I found her small hand and gently took it in mine. What would my life look like if randomly one day I could no longer feel her hand in mine? The hurt would be unbearable if one day I woke up and could no longer hear her laugh, or see her smile. A feeling of guilt overcame me as I thought about the days I wished for a break. Those long days of butting heads with an independent and sassy young lady had me on edge and ready to rip my hair out. It would be those days that I think I would miss the most.

I bowed my head and squeezed my eyes shut. Tears slid down my cheeks the more I thought about it.

Dear God, I pray that you protect my child and those children within my community and beyond. That you watch over them and ensure their safe return home each and every day. I pray there isn't another parent out there that has to wonder why, or what if. That they have the opportunity to continue making memories with their children. To watch them grow into beautiful adults with their own families.

I pray for guidance for those that are struggling, for a sign as to why they shouldn't make the decisions they're considering making. That they're shown kindness and forgiveness, given light during a dark time. I pray they find you, and in you, they find a piece of themselves that may have previously been broken so they can heal.

My whole body quivered as tears streamed down my face. With my free hand, I pulled at my shirt sleeve and wipe my nose.

Please hear my prayer, and allow for those that have been taken from us so soon to rest in peace, and those that remain with us to find the peace they need to keep on living. Amen.

"Mommy?" The sound of the sleepy voice startled me, causing my eyes to shoot open. I looked down at her small face, her sleepy eyes looked at me with a furrowed brow, "what are you doing?"

I sighed heavily and wiped my eyes. I squeezed her small hand gently and said, "I was just coming in to check on you."

"Oh, okay."

I got to my feet and turned toward the door to make my way out of the room, "Sweetheart?"

"Yeah?" Her voice was a faint whisper.

"I'm so thankful you came home safe today." I looked back over my shoulder. Her small body was wrapped in the blankets, and she breathed slowly.

I smiled and began pulling the door shut behind me when I heard her speak again, "I love you."

My vision blurred from tears. "I love you too," I said as I pulled the door till it was left open just a crack. So much.