A Last Voyage

The sound of bells clanging accompanied the busy work of sailors all along the busy wharf. Passengers and crew bustled and hurried with parcels and bags, unconcerned about the people they elbowed or the feet they trod on. Those on the receiving end barely noticed anyway; today was a day of adventure, and excitement gripped every soul by the collar of his coat and wouldn't let go. Cold wind from the sea whipped salted breeze and spray into the faces of gleeful children, gazing in wide-eyed wonder at the mighty Titanic. No one had seen a ship like it before, and today was the great day of its launch. Sebastian stared upward with them, his small pack of belongings slung over one shoulder, and his cap pushed back on his head. He whistled and clicked his tongue. It was certainly a wonder to behold. He once again patted his ticket, snug in the pocket of his vest; it was his key to the new world. Sebastian chuckled, sharing with himself in the private joke.

Sebastian made his way with the shambling line, a singular island of contented silence amidst the crowd of nagging families. Glancing ahead he spotted a group of sailors at the foot of the gangplank and exchanged eyes with a mustached man, sitting on a coil of rope with his hands on his knees. The man gave a nod with a stoic expression, taking the end of his mustache and twisting it between two fingers. Sebastian looked away and could almost feel the man staring after as the line of passengers proceeded past him up the gangplank, as if somehow the man was privy to Sebastian's secret. He glanced back to find the sailor looking elsewhere, conversing with his fellows again and unconcerned with Sebastian, and Sebastian felt at ease once again.

In his own cabin Sebastian felt even better. His simple pack of belongings, all the things he thought he would need for the duration of his trip, he dropped on the floor by his bed. He kicked off his shoes and practically fell onto the bed. The cabin was no luxury sweet, but even a private room had cost more than he should've been willing to spend. Well, it wouldn't matter soon. Sebastian soon found himself walking in his dreams down the streets of London, where he'd been not a week prior, and happening upon an old school master of his. The bumbling man recognized Sebastian with a smile and shook his hand, going on and on about life and how he'd been. Sebastian sighed but indulged him, knowing he'd be away soon enough. He had hoped to keep his trip a secret, but the man had pried. Anyway, there wasn't much harm in the old man knowing.

Miles from home in a small pub drinking and talking with the gabby headmaster Sebastian confessed he was leaving. He didn't share the whole extent of his plans, only that he was boarding the Titanic when it sailed. With the way the old man carried on about how exciting it all was- an unsinkable ship- Sebastian had half-expected to see him at the launch, if not boarding with a ticket in hand. But the man had proven to be all talk and no game, and Sebastian got away scot-free without a send-off or a shipmate. Sebastian woke, startled, and blinked, slowly realizing where he was. He sat up and stretched, remembering again how he had talked to the old man, admitting to him how unhappy he felt, even going so far as to call it sad. The man had been sympathetic but seemed to think Sebastian's trip to America would cure him, and that a fresh start was all he needed. Sebastian had no intentions of a fresh start, he thought as a yawn escaped.

Sebastian blinked awake slowly, light coming in through the porthole. His room was nearly dark as he sat up, blinking and yawning. He didn't know how long he'd slept, but it must've been all day. Standing up he felt the movement of the ship and chuckled, tucking his hat to his head as he exited the cabin. Sebastian made his way to the top deck of the ship and looked out over the rail, taking in the view of the ocean passing, the white break of foam on the side of the ship below, the wind whipping salt and spray at him, and the sun descending over the horizon. Sebastian smiled to himself, and he found he enjoyed the view, for all it was worth. He sighed to himself and stretched some of the sleep from his joints. He made his way inside for dinner.

Sebastian found himself continually postponing his plans over the next few days of the trip. Truthfully, he was having fun. The ship was full of people intent on enjoying themselves, dancing to music, dining on fine food, and after spending all of his savings on his ticket Sebastian decided to be there with them. When he returned at night to his own cabin, away from the lively voices and company of 1,000's of vagrants and rich folk, all determined to have a good time, Sebastian would almost feel the sadness return. It felt like it was standing nearby, looking at him, letting him know that when the ship docked in America and everyone disembarked to their own lives, Sebastian would be alone again, and this time he would be utterly alone. After all, who would know him in the New World? Thoughts like this kept his plan in his mind, and he returned back to his reasons for buying this ticket at all. It would be so simple, enough drink that he wouldn't feel it, and then a quick hop over the rail. Sebastian sighed contentedly and passed out, more than enough drink in him now.

Alarm bells stole Sebastian back to the waking world. He rolled out of bed and bruised his shoulder falling on the deck. He tried to stand up but found the ship's floor lilting beneath him, in an unnatural way; he didn't bother with dressing as he threw open the door to his cabin, still wearing his trousers and undershirt from the night before. His head throbbed from the drinking, and he yelled to ask what was happening. Sailors rushed past him, half-dressed on their way to God-knows-where. Sebastian spotted the mustached sailor from the pier, but he paid Sebastian no mind. Sebastian followed them. He gained the stairs to the upper deck as the ship continued its crazed tilt beneath him. He heard men yelling, and children screaming. Sebastian clutched at the railing beside him, as the blackness of the churning sea loomed before them all. The Titanic was splitting in half. Sebastian saw life rafts filling with people, but they were far from him and through a surging mass of frightened passengers and sailors.

The boats filled up before Sebastian even got close. Everyone around was crying, and weeping. There were children who didn't make it off. The ship's tilt was dramatic, and the cold face of the Atlantic Ocean loomed before them all. Every thought of his own plan, and every reason he'd had perfectly sorted before bed, had long-since vanished from his mind. Sebastian didn't want to drink and disappear over the edge. Sebastian wanted to live. He wanted very much to live.