A diary that will never be read

A diary that will never be read

Is there to be life after life?

I am writing this down more in hope than expectation. The chance that anyone left alive will even bother to look for my records are so very remote. Today, the first day of my diary, is 16 June in the year 2091. I am now alone, my companions have left their physical bodies here and gone in search of a better place. They have no knowledge that such a place exists but they think anywhere has to be better than here.

A quick explanation in case this record is found so far in a future that events of the last few years are not known. The population, of humans, on planet earth had finally began to fall. The droughts and famines of 2080 had not only decimated populations in equatorial regions but had finally forced everyone to agree that the ever increasing human birth rate was unsustainable. Even the vast chemical synthesized food factories could no longer cope. Even the omnipotent Artificial Intelligence run production facilities had their limits. The world council had decreed that in order for us to survive the borders to the devastated lands were closed; their inhabitants left to die or scratch a living out of whatever remained. They further ordered that in future birth control would be enforced, all drinking water, all the manufactured synthetic food, the only edible material available, would contain birth control chemicals. They claimed that these rules would be changed once the population numbers were under control. Someone in the vast and powerful bureaucracy forgot to tell the AI machines this last bit. Or may be they did and the machines decided that the future of the earth would be improved if humans stopped multiplying. So by 2087 the population was starting to drop, sustainability was achieved, as long as output from the food factories could be maintained. Then output was reduced, my pay grade in the universal corporation, which every human worked for, were not told why. In fact we were not told it had been cut until shortages started to hit the automated home delivery system. We all lived in corporation owned apartments, we worked from these homes and all our needs were met by machines that delivered our requirements, at least those requirements the corporation policy allowed us to have, to our storage units. We simply added water and placed in a microwave, should we be unsure about even how to do this; we asked the microwave what to do and it both gave and answer and did the work, this was in case we would dare to disagree. Any attempt to override or question the machine would be automatically recorded on the corporate files.

The reduction in food triggered changes in attitudes, slowly a questioning of the whole apparatus of our governance began to emerge. Those foolish enough to voice these questions within their homes found their doors sealed and deliveries stopped altogether. After a week of hunger and isolation the speakers in the walls asked if there were still doubts about the authority being right about everything, everyone said no and so got their supplies back. Visits to the fresh air recreational facilities were controlled by the pay grade and the home area number, the time and dates when anyone was allowed into these facilities were limited, since if everyone was allowed out at the same time the facilities would be overwhelmed. What few of us realized at that time was that the computers carefully arranged things so that social groups could not form, every visit to the fresh air was among strangers, those we met the previous week assigned to other areas or other dates. Despite this, murmurings of collective discontent started. At first just questioning how and when we came to elect the world council. The daily start of the day message always told us we lived in a democracy and our views mattered, we should always tell the council of any doubts and they would listen and try to help, all we had to do was speak out loud, preferable in front of the TV which was giving this message. The TV that could not be turned off. Strange thing is no one we met in the fresh air, could remember any elections. From time to time our apartment blocks would be sealed and our doors stayed locked all day, we were then told how this was for our safety since some infestation problem had been found in a neighbors apartment. Since we never met our neighbors, it was hard to disprove this so we accepted, as we did everything else the TV set told us.

The murmurings became louder, the realization that we actually had no power, no control over the world council grew, a small group formed that decided to physically explore the area around one of the designated fresh air parks. The courage to actually think of ignoring the rules was incredible to the rest of us and we waited their report. It never came. We were never assigned to that park again, we never met any of the people involved ever again. Five days ago the world changed. On the 13th a Friday, I was assigned to fresh air park 3 for an hour, it was freezing cold, everyone was wrapped up in heat restorative sheets over our standard company uniforms. As I strolled around a figure came the other way a female about my own age, she stumbled and we bumped into each other; this was not a scheduled or authorized coupling and so we both recoiled. I saw she had dropped an object, a heart shaped locket, although my education system had made me aware of the heart shape I had never seen a locket before, I picked it up in wonderment and as my fingers wrapped round it, to my surprise it clicked open, inside was a small photo of a person, a very old person. I have never met people older than myself and yet I somehow realized they must exist, I had never seen even a photo of one before. The female looked at me with such sadness, muttered something that sounded like ”please don't tell” and she hurried off. At that time, so few days ago, I did not understand what it was I was not to tell, or who I was to keep the secret from. Just before my hour was over another strange thing happened, I saw a person I recognized from a previous fresh air allowance. He was just as startled by the mutual recognition as I was and we naturally started talking about this strange event. It was then we both learned that those who set off to explore had disappeared, we also both had the same experience of reduced deliveries. We talked and became carried away with the sheer excitement of person to person communication that we over stayed our time. It was only when the park filled with others did we realize this. It was only later that day, back in the safety of my apartment did I come to understand the system must have failed because it should not have been possible for two who had met before, to meet again nor should it have been possible that the next batch of fresh air users could be admitted to the park before we had left. The system was crumbling but at that moment I did not understand this.

The next morning Saturday 14th, I woke but there was no alarm call, no morning message demanding that I pay attention. The TV was silent and blank. This was the first time in my life I had known it dark and silent, it was frightening, but not as bad a s what was to follow. The water tap gave no water, the artificial daylight had not come on, the food storage would not open, the microwave did not answer my question. I was trapped in this silent darkness, a totally new and painful experience. The door from my apartment stayed shut, this was not new but in that silent darkness it felt significant, more than it ever had before.

My work for the universal corporation had been to check designs for electrical circuits, with out this part of my education system I would have been trapped till I died, as so many others have done; I used the handle of my tooth brush to lever off a panel beside the door. This allowed me to change the wiring so the door opened and stayed that way. Obviously my first thoughts were that some how my picking up the locket had been recorded and my dark imprisonment was punishment for this transgression, this made me afraid that by breaking out I was going to provoke even harsher treatment but then once out of my apartment I realized everything in the whole block was shut down. It was also silent because of the sound proofing, I could not hear then, the calls and panic of the others in the block. I found my way down endless stairs, I had always used the elevators before. It was chance that let me find that the stairs existed, I had lent against a partition and it opened to reveal a stair case. By the time I reached the ground level I was exhausted, the thought of going back that way could not be contemplated, but why go back up? no supplies, no water. I had to alter the wires again to get out of the block than I started towards the transport station which would normally take me to my assigned fresh air park. Now nothing. The transport units were there but not moving, nothing moved, I was alone no people not even the usual robotic health and safety police officers. I walked toward the rising sun, no idea why but I had to go some place. I was thirsty and hungry with no idea how to find either food or drink. All around was concrete buildings, paved roads with their transport rails, nothing moved, nothing showed any likelihood of giving me a drink. After a while I reached a fresh air park, it was not one I recognized but it was an open space where light and a fresh wind blew into my face. Then I saw a movement, three other people walking towards me. We all had similar experiences and so realized the who life support system was shut down. One had passed over a bridge that crossed moving water and so we all tracked back in that direction. It was so strange to see in so much water in an uncontrolled rushing mass; but it was water. We climbed down and scooped up handfuls, it tasted odd but satisfied our thirst. We spent the rest of the day talking about what to do next. We forgot our hunger in this strange, some how liberating situation of open direct conversation with other people. Problem was none of us had a clue about how to find food. Several times we returned to the odd tasting water. Darkness crept up on us. We found the nearest block and I again used my skill to rewire the entrance so we sheltered in the hallway. The doors to the apartments had solid surrounds I could only work my magic trick from inside them.

Sunday 15th, we had dozed slept talk our way through the night but now it was not hunger causing problems, our tongues felt on fire the inside of our mouths were swollen, the water had poised us, lethargy overcame us and time passed.

Today the 16th I have started to scrawl this diary on the wall, scratching the letters with the end of my tooth brush, the light is fading, my strength gone I go to join the others in a search for a better life.