Want to make children talk back less, "respect" is the best medicine

A child's backtalk is one of the most difficult things for many parents to tolerate because the child is supposed to be submissive and is a "personal item" belonging to the parents.

And from the parent's point of view, parents criticize their children, even if they hit and scold them, it is for the good of the child, so the child's backtalk behavior is tantamount to disappointing the parents' efforts.

It is such an atmosphere, resulting in many parents dealing with the problem of child backtalk initiatives inappropriate, the result is not only the original problem is not solved, but their relationship with the child is also becoming increasingly distant.

On the first day of the New Year, a cousin and his 7-year-old son because of a small matter in front of all the relatives fierce quarrel, and now a few days later, the father and son still have not released the past, that incident caused serious damage to the parent-child relationship between the two.

The cause of the incident is very simple, the cousin's son and relatives of a 5-year-old boy grab toys, the cousin thinks his son is older and should give way to the other side, so forced his son to let go.

But the son thought that the other party has been playing for a long time, and now it is his turn to play, how refused to let go. At that time, many people were watching, the cousin can not face, the tone will be aggravated, the son choked back: "I am not wrong, it was my turn to play."

The son's backtalk made his cousin even more embarrassed, so he reached out and took it away, and immediately made his son cry, and the two of them quarreled with each other, and only after a group of relatives persuaded them to calm down.

In this case, the cousin and the son have a valid reason, but unfortunately, communication problems, because of too much regard for their face, resulting in the cousin's behavior being a little too aggressive, thus triggering a "father-son war"

Such examples are not uncommon in real life, how to properly deal with children's backtalk behavior, for ordinary parents is indeed very difficult.

But parenting experts Li Meiji has its tricks, she once said in a public speech: when the child backtalk, the most suitable method is to say 3 words to him, not only can solve the problem, the child will grow up to appreciate you.

When a child talks back, parents say these 3 words work best

1, you can express unhappiness, but do not feel free to say that others hate

When parents go against the wishes of children, many children will blurt out: I hate you! This is the intuitive expression of the child's inner emotions, he said these words, and will not take into account how much love their parents have for them, as well as these words on how big the blow to parents is.

The reality, however, is that such words are hurtful and often become the trigger that sets off the parents' emotions. So when your child says such things to you again, make sure you take the opportunity to tell him that it is okay to express unhappiness, but not to feel free to say that others are nasty, because this is verbal violence and can be very painful to others.

Through this guidance, you can make your child understand the killing power of language, and when you want to talk back again in the future, you will naturally be much more cautious.

2, the heart of the dissatisfaction to say, parents promise not to force you

Children talk back because there is dissatisfaction in their hearts, but under the suppression of parental authority, he does not dare to feel free to vent this dissatisfaction.

The best way at this point is for their parents to encourage him to express his inner dissatisfaction and promise not to force him to do anything he does not want.

In this way, in the future, the child will have any dissatisfaction or reluctance, and will first communicate with parents, rather than talk back to this extreme form of expression.

3, people are not rational enough when angry, wait to calm down

When children talk back, parents should also remember to remind them that now is not the time to communicate, because people will lose part of their sanity in anger, only when they calmed down and regained their sanity is more suitable for communication.

This will quickly ease the conflict and use the time to soothe the child's inner negative emotions, thus making future communication smoother.

Each person is an individual, and children certainly have the right to express their own will, parents should face their children's backtalk behavior.

Can not simply be seen as "disobedient" or "rebellious", otherwise, it will lead to a growing backlog of dissatisfaction in the mind of the child, once the threshold is crossed, the consequences will be unthinkable.

Want to make children less talk back, "respect" is the best medicine

The older generation of parents hardly tolerates their children's back-talking behavior, while today's young parents, in this area, are much improved.

The reason is simple, the younger generation of parents have a higher level of education, but also more respect for their children's independent personalities.

So it is easy to see that respect is the best medicine to prevent children from talking back, as long as the child feels respected.

The inner rebellion is less likely to be aroused, and when it comes to anything, they will be more willing to cooperate with their parents, rather than deliberately the other way around.

Children's back-talking behavior is not all negative, because parents are not saints, and there will certainly be times of misjudgment.

Furthermore, the fact that a child dares to talk back proves that he dares to defy authority and has a strong opinion, qualities that will help him greatly in his future development.