The post-90s parents'"flawless parenting" has become popular, netizens: but to be reasonable, they are disrespectful to themselves when they were young.

Parents' Hall

.

Integrate China and the West, gather elite parents at home and abroad, and broaden the vision of international education.

The "flawless parenting" of post-90s parents has become popular.

Put rotten, it means that things can no longer develop for the better, so simply no longer take measures to control, but let it continue to develop in the bad direction.

Bad parenting is that children cry and make trouble, and the parents' attitude is that you can do whatever you like.

Contemporary parents put out bad parenting.

Parents: if I ignore you, I will lose.

A few days ago, # parents put bad parenting # attracted everyone's attention.

In public, the child incarnated as a "bear child" fell to the ground, lying on the ground throwing and rolling, parents: I will quietly watch, pay attention to you, even if I lose.

The post-90s parents even think that they have material to post on moments. Just lie down. I'll play with my phone.

"Let me take a picture and post it on moments first." my mother's perspective is like this:

Whenever this time, the husband: "wife, you go back, I will spend time with him."

"if you cry, I'll take a look."

In the parenting concept of post-90s parents, everyone seems to do the same thing, spoiling children does not exist!

Some parents even use big tricks to "treat others in their own way":

"if you do it, I will do it."

"you dillydally, I dillydally more than you."

In addition to "bad parenting", contemporary parents also practice "reverse parenting".

When the child walked on alone, the mother shouted anxiously, "I won't go, I'll get lost."

Not only that, you not only have to pick up your own water cups when you go out, but also help your mother with lipstick and air cushions.

Many netizens said that this is exactly the same as themselves, "take the baby's way, so that the child has no way to go."

This way of parenting has caused the extreme comfort of netizens:

"the child is so poor, I laugh so happily!"

"the post-90s are all the same parents. I just want to say: well done!"

"Grandma still has 10 seconds to get to the battlefield."

Some netizens also said:

These are the parents of the post-90s generation. I am kind of looking forward to the performance of the post-90s parents.

What would you do in front of your children in public?

Some people think that this way of parenting is very good.

Some people do not agree, think that the result of indifference and laissez-faire attitude is not very good, this is a negative way, there is no effect, the child is not sensible or not sensible.

In the face of questions from some netizens, some people explained that after cold treatment, when the child calms down, he will reason with TA and explain the reasons for dissatisfaction.

After cold treatment, netizens explained that this approach is still commendable.

In fact, it is very inappropriate for parents to have cold treatment in the face of their child's crying. Although cold treatment will let the child know that "it is useless to make trouble", in public places, the child's problems have not been solved and lose face.

Contemporary parents know that they can't spoil their children. once they choose to "throw in the towel", their children will not become obedient after they are satisfied, but will become more and more capricious and often splash and roll around so as to achieve their own goals.

At the same time, we also know that we can't educate the child directly on the spot. On the one hand, the crying child simply doesn't listen. On the other hand, it may make the child feel afraid of society and feel ashamed of himself.

Most of the time, children need more face than adults. When TA feels humiliated, the sense of shame in his heart is much greater than we think.

In fact, from the meaning of the word "broken parenting", we can realize that this is the helpless act of parents.

There is nothing parents can do about their child's crying. Since they can't let the child stop, they can only watch. The center is that they can't get used to it anyway.

"do nothing and do nothing" to conquer the bear child.

Not educating, compromising and coldly dealing with crying children in public does not mean that they will not care.

The child cried in public, and Professor Li Meijin once put forward a principle of "one action and four inaction", which should be used for reference by every one of us.

When children know how to threaten their parents with crying, we should adhere to these two basic principles:

As soon as you do it: tell your child clearly that this is wrong and that it is useless. If you really want to make trouble, just keep doing it.

The child's request is unreasonable, and parents have every right to refuse. They should not be soft-hearted just because the child is crying.

This is not to be cruel, but to teach children to develop a sense of rules and tell TA that some things are not "you are reasonable." Once parents feel that their children are too humiliated to play in public and choose to compromise, the children will seize the weakness of adults endlessly.

Fourth, do not do: do not scold, do not fight, do not reason with crying children, do not pretend to leave.

Through a long speech on the spot to reason, or by beating and scolding the child to the education, the two ways are often the same: useless, parents of the big truth as if the noise in the ear, simply can not listen to what will happen in the future; similarly, leaving the child alone in the room for reflection is tantamount to solitary confinement and has no educational significance at all.

Parents are well aware of this in "flawless parenting".

However, the solution proposed by Professor Li Meijin is different from that of parents of "spoiled parenting".

Li Meijin said: in the street, especially when there are outsiders, when their children lose their temper, parents should pick up their children and go home directly, or take them to a quiet environment, watch TA cry and conduct one-on-one discipline.

As mentioned above, children need to save face, and parents may also be influenced by public crowds and fail to achieve their own goal of educating their children.

Therefore, the best solution is to hold the child in a quiet environment that will not hinder others or hurt himself, accompany the child, and discipline the child after TA has calmed down.

Children close their eyes while crying, but there are also three times when they open their eyes:

When children open their eyes for the first time, they want to see if parents are paying attention to themselves. at this time, parents only need to stare at their children.

The second time he opened his eyes, the child looked at his parents and thought, "Why don't they come and coax me?"

The third time you open your eyes, the child will stop crying, because TA thinks it's no use crying.

It is not a bad thing for children to splash and roll. TA is expressing their needs, but they have not yet learned how to achieve their goals.

We must give the child a space to talk well. when he gets home, the child will vent enough. wipe his face with a hot towel and communicate after the child is emotionally stable. Tell your child what's wrong and what reasonable ways you should use to get what you want.

@ Xiao Guo's mother shared her practice.

Once I took my daughter to a restaurant for dinner, but the food hadn't been served yet. The sister who was eating at the same table ordered juice, and she wanted it, too.

But she didn't agree, saying, "you've had a lot of drinks these days. You can't drink any more tonight."

On hearing this, the daughter changed her expression and began to cry.

She said nothing but took her daughter out of the child's seat and walked to the corner of the stairs outside the restaurant, where no one was particularly quiet and began to wait for her daughter to calm down and explain to her why she was not allowed to drink.

She felt that it was very impo