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The Mother Writer Group

The club that all creative moms need

By Megan ClancyPublished 3 years ago 7 min read
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The Mother Writer Group
Photo by fotografierende on Unsplash

I have come to the point in my life where I have two great passions: writing and motherhood. Frequently, these two things seem at odds with one another, each vying for the majority of my time and energy. I used to be completely focused on my writing. I studied creative writing in college, got my MFA, and published a book. Writing was my life. Then I had children and I quickly discovered that being a person who pursues a creative passion and motherhood don’t always mix well – if at all. And while I was able to maintain a pretty strong writing routine after the birth of my first child, after my second child I found myself sinking into a life-halting depression. I realized a lot of this was due to the fact that I no longer had the time (nor mental and emotional strength) to write. And I didn’t have much of a community around me that truly understood being both a mother and a writer; the need that goes with both these things and the ache you feel when one is lacking.

It's not easy getting your words in with little ones around.

Having gone through a lot during the early years of motherhood, I understand how important and necessary it is for mothers to be supported. And mothers who are also trying to pursue creative interests need an extra level of help. We must encourage and support mothers who want to continue their creative work. As a mother, finding the time and energy to follow a life of creative production is difficult. Often impossible. The requirements of motherhood frequently consume all of a woman’s time and energy, leaving very little for other focuses. Add to this the societally supported belief that a good mother must sacrifice everything for her children and that women who want to create outside of these confines are seen as selfish and lacking in their motherliness. We have made it almost impossible for creative mothers.

But isn’t the ideal mother one who is the best version of herself and can give her best to her children? As mothers, we are some of the first and biggest role models for our children. If we are living the life we love, we are setting an example for them to do the same. Maybe we will inspire our children to follow in our footsteps and become writers themselves. Or maybe we will inspire them to simply do what they love, find a passion and work hard at it. Either way, by supporting writing mothers in living their best, creative lives, we are supporting future generations trying to do the same.

Letting our kids see us work, while trying to work in the chaos.

Writing, and art as a whole, is frequently seen as a luxury. But we can no longer look at it that way. Writing can often be the only outlet a person has. It can literally be a lifesaver both in its creation and its consumption. We have absolutely seen over the past two years, during a time when people have been isolated due to the pandemic, how valuable creative work has been. It has been an outlet for frustrations and loneliness. It has been a space to distract from the realities of the world. Now more than ever, art is necessary. I believe this is even more true for mothers, many of whom feel they have lost themselves completely to the duties of motherhood. Writing can be therapy. It can be an escape. It can be our only true connection to our deepest thoughts and emotions. Often it is the one and only way to feel like ourselves again.

Writing and momming requires multitasking.

Over the past year, I have found my involvement in both the writing community and mother community online to be invaluable to my growth in both areas as well as my mental health. And I love contributing to this space, giving back my fellow writers and mothers. People who follow me in these communities are interested in what I have to say on these topics. (To date, my most read story on Vocal is a piece on the worst advice you can give to new moms.) And in discussions with women who also bridge these two groups, the same feelings are repeated: I wish I had more time for my writing. I wish I felt more supported as a mom writer. I need a break! And while there are groups out there who focus on this market, (a big shout out to #momswritersclub and all the awesome women there!) I want to take this community one step further.

Elizabeth Gilbert writes in her book Big Magic, “A creative life is an amplified life. It’s a bigger life, a happier life, an expanded life, and a hell of a lot more interesting life.” I want to help moms find their bigger, happier, more interesting life. In a perfect world, I would create a membership group to help moms who want to pursue writing be able to do so. It would provide balance and support for women who are yearning for a way to be great in both the writing and mothering sides of their lives.

The Mother Writer Group

Membership would include:

Online Community

The most important part of this group is the online community that comes with membership. The ability to reach out and be involved with other women who are going through the same struggles and successes that you are as a writer and mother. In this community, women will be able to find writing groups, critique partners, beta readers, and just a bunch of other mom writers who are in this with you.

Resources Database

There are already tons of resources online for writers who are moms. But you have to know where to look. And have tons of time to look. The Mother Writer Group website would be a place where you could easily locate all those resources in a quick and efficient manner.

Scholarships & Grants

The group would also build an online database of scholarships, grants, and fellowships to help mothers pursue their art. Eventually, enough funding would be raised by the group so that we could also start to offer our own grants to members.

Online Courses & Workshops

We would host multiple online writing courses and workshops throughout the year, led by different authors, agents, and professionals in the publishing world. Ideally, these leaders would themselves be mothers, therefore having a better understanding of the needs of our members. Courses would focus on many different aspects of the craft (such as plotting, scene building, character development, etc.) as well as things like improving your query letter or how to market your writing.

Regional Conferences

Multiple times a year, we would host in-person writing conferences. Similar to other writing conferences, workshops and presentations would focus on the many aspects of writing (craft, getting an agent, publishing, etc.). But the big picture of the conference would be to provide a space where writers who are also moms get a chance to not only focus on their work, but interact with other mom-writers. Audio and video recordings of conference sessions would also be uploaded to the website so that members who were not able to attend could still view them. The online collection of conference lectures would be open to viewing whenever members have the time.

Deluxe Retreats (This is the main draw for members of the Mother Writer Group)

The deluxe retreats would go above and beyond our regional conferences. Hosted twice a year (summer/winter) these would be writer retreats for mothers to focus on their craft. These retreats would also be unique in the fact that they would not only allow a participant time to work on their writing and attend group sessions, they would also include personal restorative offerings. Massage, yoga, spa, and guided meditation would all be included to allow mothers a chance to refresh themselves mentally, emotionally, and physically, while taking a much-needed break from their families. And obviously, this would include all the drinks and coffee members could want.

Potential for Growth:

While this group would initially serve mothers who write, I do see the group eventually expanding to include mothers practicing a wide variety of art. Being a writer myself, I understand the ins and outs of writing and the industry around it. But I know this kind of group could be beneficial to moms in all creative fields. After establishing the group in its service to writers, I would like to see it expand to serve moms who are pursuing the creation of art in all mediums.

I know it would take a lot of time and effort (and money) to make this a reality. But if I could make it so that no mom writer ever again has to feel lost, lonely, or unsupported, or like she has to choose one pasison or the other, it would definitely be worth it.

Hi there! Thank you so much for reading my story. If you liked it, go ahead and click on that little heart button below. And if you really liked, and are feeling a bit generous, a tip is always appreciated. Help me keep writing things for you to enjoy reading.

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About the Creator

Megan Clancy

Author & Book Coach, wife, mother, adventure-seeker.

BA in English from Colorado College & MFA from the University of Melbourne

Writing here is Fiction & Non-Fiction

www.meganaclancy.com

Find me on Twitter & IG @mclancyauthor

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