When I was young, I NEVER, EVER thought I would be the type of parent I am now. I would have absolutely insisted that I would be a very cool and laid back, fun mum who didn’t care about rules, never gave lectures and was always understanding, easy going, and of course, best friends with her kids.
Well....Turns out, not so much 😬😂
I shock myself every day with how traditional and strict on things I, apparently, am. It’s so strange! Because I really had no idea I was this way at all.
My kids always ask to play board games and want me to play, but I lost interest and stopped playing with them, because honestly- it was never any fun.
It always seemed like they were trying to bend the rules, or complaining something wasn’t fair, not paying attention or getting upset when they didn’t win etc.
So, I got fed up. I told them that games are meant to be fun! And it’s only fun if everyone follows the rules, plays fair and has a positive attitude about playing. (Who am I???)
Winning isn’t the point. The fun is in actually playing. And winning is only satisfying if you win fair and square because you played well.
Why would you want people to let you win out of sympathy?
What’s the point of playing in that case? Feeling bad when you win and when you lose? No thanks!
Sometimes I think they believe bickering is a leisure activity in itself!
If you want to play and to be seen as a competitor, the only thing you can do is, get good at the game.
Enjoy playing. Be a good winner and a good loser. It’s about sportsmanship.
I think this is a good way to approach everything in life.
I feel like I’ve become very strict with my kids which I don’t like and never ever thought I would be.
It’s funny how you change.
I am not a complete tyrant though. I swear!! I do always make sure that I balance it out with being loving and affectionate etc. I am nice to them too.
I just think as a parent, sometimes you have to be the bad guy so your kids can learn the important lessons. Not to be mean, but so they realize the importance of certain things and how to know which are the most important things out of all I am trying to teach them.
If I just let things slide all the time, I feel I would only enabling them to have poor social skills which would hurt them in the long run.
The most basic lessons are often the most important and these seem to be the ones that get totally overlooked, in favour of spending more time teaching academics or more technical skills, since those skills seem to be what is valued in society at this time.
I really hope other parents are remembering to teach their kids the basics of being human, like being fair, having manners, good sportsmanship, and of having a positive attitude so there is a good foundation to build on.
I really hope when my kids grow up and are out in the world, they won’t find themselves unable to compete or have even have a chance at success in the game of LIFE, because no one else cares or even understands those fundamental values anymore.
It worries me. Everyday.
So if you have kids and feel the same as I do, and struggle with raising them with traditional values in a world that is so singularly focussed on progress without any respect for anything of the past, know that I am feeling the same way and that you won’t be the only parent teaching their kids these lessons.
I think we should take the good things about the past, and leave the bad behind. We don’t need to get rid of everything in order to make progress.
Yes, clinging to the old ways and not being open to any change is too strict.
However, progress with no foundation at all for the basics of being a social being is total chaos.
Parenting is so much more responsibility than I thought it would be. No one could have prepared me for what I was getting myself into! But I am in it for the long haul. And I’m going to do what I really believe is best for them. Even if no one agrees with me.
I told them I may be willing to play a board game with them again, but only if and when I see they have learned how to do it the right way.
Only if it can be fun.
I haven’t heard any arguing or complaining so far. Fingers crossed, because Mummy likes to have fun too!!!
If your kids ever complain that you are mean or strict, you can just tell them about me! 🤣
Here they are, having fun, playing a game! Miracle! 😍😍😍😍