A plethora of internet content is devoted to the subject of breastfeeding. A person can gorge themselves on material dedicated to the "whys," and the "shoulds," and the "what-ifs" surrounding the advent of breastfeeding. Similarly, articles about breastfeeding maladies and how to fix them run amok, sharing equal time with the warm squishy fuzzy articles about how wonderful breastfeeding is.
Divorce can be a nasty beast and in the end, it is the children that suffer the most. My parents separated but still lived in the family house. My mum did her best but the endless rowing became the norm. My dad went completely postal! Cut up Mum’s underwear, salt in the sugar pot, padlocked what used to be their shared bedroom, relegated my mum to sleeping on the sofa and to top it off—he loosened the wheel nuts on the car! Luckily it was spotted before any real damage could occur—what if I and my two sisters had been in the car with mum on a motorway! It does not bear thinking about! I can understand that dad is angry and hurt but trying to harm his children and the mother of his children is unforgivable.
After a few failed relationships and miscarriages, my mom decided to go ahead and have me on her own. I was, as people like to say, her “miracle baby.” Still, just because she fulfilled her life’s goal of becoming a mother didn’t mean she lost all other basic human needs. At some point during my childhood, she ended up falling in love with the man across the street from us. Years went by and they even got engaged. I grew to see him as the father I’d never had.
On this day, two years ago, I lost my best friend. I remember it so clearly, like it was yesterday. I awoke at 9:00 AM and rubbed my tired eyes. I checked my phone, and decided that it was time to start my day. I hopped into the shower, dressed myself, and made my way downstairs. At this point my dad had left for work, and my stepmom was sitting downstairs drinking a cup of coffee. This was my daily routine. Wake up, get ready, drink coffee, and go to work. I sat in the garage with my stepmom as she smoked a cigarette. I felt weird. I felt like the weight of my body was dragging me down, and it was almost unbearable to walk. I felt moody. Every passing car that I heard drive by irritated me beyond belief. I felt so tired; like I hadn’t slept in centuries. At one point I remember saying to my stepmom, “I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me, but I feel like total shit today.”
You know how they say "it takes two to make a baby." Well, that part is most certainly true but what if that's the only part where the two actually work together? Then there's trouble. I've been with my fiance since we were 16 years old. We have two beautiful children and one on the way. Since I was pregnant with our son he has been there but not been there. Let me explain to you what I mean: when I was 3 months pregnant with our son he went to jail over something very stupid and had to do 8 months. So by the time he got out, our son was already 2 months old. He was so happy and excited. He took his role very seriously...for about a month.
Toddlers are not easy to handle; that's why people call this age "the terrible two's" or "the terrible three's." This is a time in your parenting career where your sanity will probably be put to the test, and to a point, many new parents might even say it's worse than the newborn stage.
I’ve never been a fan of absolutes, but people seem to be drawn to listicles (myself included), so here is a concise list of knowledge I’ve acquired as a result of both my education in Humanistic and Clinical Psychology and my experience as a step-mother of two beautiful young human beings.
When I decided to go back to work I had to face the same traumatic decision as every other working mother.
When you’re a kid, your parents aren’t always the people you listen to when it comes to really learning things. You hear them, but you don’t always heed their advice. In fact, for most teenagers, you do the exact opposite of what they tell you.
As babies, we appear to spend much of our time sleeping, despite growing and learning faster than we do during any other time of our life. We don’t have the ability to communicate at that age, so many people wonder how babies sleep and dream.
From a very young age up to my late twenties, I was bullied. I was bullied for the way I looked, dressed, my body, my weight, for having learning problems and for being 'too soft.' It went on for so long, that I started to hide behind a 'mask,' this means, I hid my authentic self and changed everything about myself just to fit in with the 'crowd.'