Growing up with divorced parents can cause some gaps in how things were between your parents. One parent says they tried to be there while the other, which is usually the one with sole custody, claims otherwise. When you have siblings that come from each parents' new relationships you start to feel pushed out and alone. Add to that the ten year age gap between the siblings and yourself and you start to have vastly different views on how each parent was. For instance, on parent may have barely been in your life for one reason or another and while you and your parent know this to be fact, the sibling may see it differently. This difference in views can often lead to conflict in that the child of that distant parent may feel offended especially if that parent was amazing to their child.
When I was granted sole physical and legal custody of my daughter, the overwhelming response from most friends and family was, "Congratulations, Yay! You won! It's over," or some variation of that.
I come from a broken home. A mom, dad, and one older sister—I have them all... but we aren't all together.
When you marry someone, you don’t think of an end other than “til death do you part.” You see forever, you see the one, you see the both of you growing together, having kids, buying a house, traveling the world, and growing old. For me, that was not how it worked out. For me, my husband did not want forever, he just wanted for now.
According to the CDC the current divorce rate in the United States is 3.2 per 1,000 population, and half of all children will be witness to a parent's divorce in their lifetime. This isn't about all children, though. This is about my brother and me.
Frustrated is the word that pops in my head when I think about living hand over fist. I could say we’ve all been there but that isn’t exactly the truth. Most people in this world will never understand what it means to live this way. And while many are living this way, there is still someone out there miles away or minutes away that have it worse.
When you say your "I do's" or "Till death do us part" and start a family not in a million years would you think this marriage wouldn’t last. The hardest part was trying to hold it together to co-parent our three minor children. My ex moved back to New York and I remained in Texas with the kids while the divorce was coming along. I remember the judge telling me that I was being too gracious in asking for joint custody. If I had it my way I would've filed for sole custody, but I had to realize that it wasn't about me. He may have sucked as a husband, but he is a great father to the kids and in the end that's what really matters.
Since the age of five or six, I cannot personally remember, you and mom have been divorced. Nothing messy, just not living together anymore.
My parents got married when I was nine years old. I had a brother that was 14 at the time. My family all together was dysfunctional. My mother was kind and gentle. Both of my parents were using methamphetamine. It was a rough childhood. My parents fought and yelled. I even think my father cheated on my mom several times. By the end of fifth grade, my family was ready to dissolve. My mother had finally had enough. She told my father to leave after one fight not expecting for him to take me and my brother. I got dropped at a family friend's house where I stayed for 6 months. I returned to my mother only once during that time. The house was a mess, my mother was depressed, and she had even started dating.
This is the story of how I met my dad, again. When I was six years old I stopped seeing my dad. I never honestly knew why. I only heard one side of the story, my mom's side. Her story was that he never wanted to see us again. When my mom and dad divorced, he found a new wife. The court ordered in the divorce that my dad was supposed to visit us every other summer. He did until he got married. After he got married we only saw him twice. The last time I saw him was when I was six years old. I do not remember a lot about the visits with my dad. The last thing I remember is our last visit when he had a son. He said it was the son he always wanted. That made no sense because he already had a son, my actual brother. That was our last visit.