Reinvention

The only thing (I believe) that is more powerful than the mind; is the courage of the heart! A quote that I read somewhere resonated within me. Priding myself with a strong mind and being praised for my courageous heart; this quote was the key to my success and personal journey.

I have spent every January 1st, for as long as I could remember making some resolution that never lasted, with each year failing earlier. Last year, my daughters and I had a goodbye vigil of my smoking habit. We headed to our front porch at exactly 12:01 a.m. after the infamous ball drop. It was epic and loud and their little faces lit up as we set the remaining pack on fire. Within 72 hours my resolution was broken and I continue to be a smoker, and they continue to remind me of that night.

So, I went back to the drawing board and spent all of 2021 assessing, analyzing, and then developing a resolution plan for 2022. My board began with one word, reinvention. What do I want to reinvent I asked myself? To answer me (which I do often, out loud, usually when I driving), everything!

Every day I revisited that one word, sipping my morning coffee thinking, staring, and then walking away. Nope, nothing, not even a flicker of thought-provoking ideas. An unmovable mental block, impenetrable wall between gut feeling and thoughts. I was stuck.

Until, my family and I were watching Yellowstone, our favorite TV drama. Usually, multitasking while watching, I tend to always stop and give extra attention to Cole Hauser’s character Rip Wheeler’s scenes. I have a completely normal and healthy obsession with him. My therapist is aware, it is normal to have a middle-aged celebrity crush! It is, right? Anyway, moving on. In this particular scene, he said a line and I am paraphrasing: “If you look around and boil it down, it’s amazing how LITTLE we need”. THAT IS IT! I screamed! My peacefully sleeping dogs jumped up and started barking. My husband looked at me concerned and said “are you ok?”. Fireworks, light bulb, woohoo! The mental block dislodged, Rip penetrated through the wall. I ran directly to my board and added that statement (and a picture of Rip for just a bit of added inspiration).

My 2022 board flowed effortlessly from there. Our life is filled with stress, chaos, and frustration because we just have too much! Too many thoughts, sweets, unhealthy habits, material things - just all too much! In 2022 I was going to reinvent myself, my home, and my family with only what we needed, and according to my love, Rip: “is very little once boiled down”.

I had a well-thought-out and written plan (beginning with a daily 6 AM wake-up time), the power of my mind, and courage in my heart. I felt a strong determination that I had not felt in years, and I believed in myself. On January 1, 2022, I began. I set my alarm, looked at my board, and went to bed. At 6 AM, my alarm rang and I slept through it. My husband woke me up at 9 AM, “so how did that 6 AM work out for you?” Minor set back, no biggie, re-adjust, I got this. So, on January 2, 2022, I began!

Since then, I have made that 6 AM morning wake up. I meditate or write to clear too many thoughts from the day prior, I shower to cleanse my body and soul from any negativity from the previous day and I work out. I then go room by room, removing too much and downsizing to only what we need. Which, I have determined is our minds, our health, our hearts, and each other (with some clothing, food, and fun along the way). 2022, even in a pandemic, will be simply amazing!