Mothers Never Forget!

In my opinion mothers are real heroes. If you don’t agree just go back down your personal history lane. Start by remembering that she carried you in her womb for nine months. It was not a holiday for her. Growing inside her caused her much discomfort but she endured it. However, some of the time she had to take some medication to be able to cope.

Unfortunately, sometimes these medications caused more harm than good. Have you heard of thalidomide? This was a drug given to pregnant women in late 1950s and early 1960s to help them to relieve some of the discomfort associated with pregnancies. At the end of the day, it turned out to be a disaster. Thalidomide affected the unborn babies and most were later born without limbs! These babies came to be known as thalidomide babies.

Thalidomide babies were mostly confined to the developed world of those days; meaning North America, Europe, Japan and probably Australia and New Zealand. Africa and the rest of the poor world were spared the calamity brought by thalidomide. Being poor, the women could not afford the medication. Perhaps one of those times when poverty is a blessing!

Your mother could have easily aborted you but she didn’t. She accepted the responsibility of being a woman. Then came the day you were born. They the pain associated with giving birth is simply unimaginable! But your mother endured it and you came out. Your mother forgot about the pain the moment she saw you; instead, she smiled.

Another nightmare was about to begin. The nightmare associated with making sure that you survive and thrive. Maybe you have not given it much thought but you would not have survived if your mother hadn’t given it all to protect you. For sometime you were totally helpless. You needed to be fed, cleaned and nursed when you fall ill – which was frequent. How many times did your mother spend sleepless nights because you were ill and couldn’t sleep? Even if the father was there, it was assumed that spending sleepless nights tending the baby was more of a mother’s duty.

Do you know that your mother was your first teacher? She played with you and through the plays you learned to socialize. When the time was proper, she taught you how to sit, how to crawl, how to stand and how to take your first steps. When you grew up a bit and had to start formal schooling your mother was there in the frontline.

I once saw a Japanese movie called NORIKO. Noriko was one of the thalidomide babies. When the father saw Noriko’s condition when she was born, he ran away leaving all the responsibility of bringing her up on her mother’s shoulders. When the time to start formal schooling came, many schools rejected her. Noriko’s mother did not give up; she fought hard until she found a school that accepted her daughter.

When my youngest son started school, his mother would wake him at around 4.30 in the morning. This was necessary because the school bus passed through our area at around 5.30, and preparations needed at least one hour. It was natural that a kid of his age – he was 4 years old – would protest a lot being woken up at that time.

His mother would take him to the toilet and urge him to relieve himself. Many a time the boy complained that he didn’t feel the urge but his mother would never accept that. The boy would cry but his mother would pretend not to hear. Eventually the kid would relieve himself, get a bath with his mother’s help and put on his school uniform, ready for boarding the bus at 5.30. I remember this period very well because my wife prohibited me from bring roasted cashew nuts at home. My boy loved cashew nuts but my wife believed that cashew nuts in a way caused constipation!

I have thought hard about this routine and I honestly believe that if it was left to me, I could not handle it, or at least with the efficiency that my wife demonstrated. I believe the boy would have cried a lot because I could hardly tolerate the situation. Intolerance brings anger, and we all know what anger can lead into.

I believe I am not alone. Most fathers can not bring up their children at close range. At close range I doing all those things that their mothers do. There is a classic poem called ‘Father Forgets’. "Father Forgets" is a famous poem written by W. Livingston Larned in 1923. The poem is a poignant portrayal of a father's realization that he has been too hard on his son and has forgotten to show him love and affection. The poem has become a classic in the parenting literature and is often used as a reminder to parents to take time to appreciate and cherish their children.

Maybe someone should write a poem and title it ‘Mothers never forget!’