Mon·ster /ˈmänstər/ - We All Know Evil People Exist It's Not Easy When The Monster's Your Mom

Monday, 13 May 2024

By: TB Obwoge

I've always known that I don't have a "normal" mother, she's always hated me. She's tried her best to show me how much she despised me, since I was as young as, 4-years old.

What mother does this? Well apparently its more common than you think.

According to this Googled account here are some statistics on child abuse in the United States of America.

According to NCBI Bookshelf, 18% of child abuse cases in the United States involve physical abuse, 9% involve sexual abuse, and 11% involve other types of maltreatment. However, neglect is the most common form of child abuse, accounting for 76% of victims.

Source: National Children's Alliance

Then, according to the CDC, 1 in 7 children has experienced abuse or neglect in the past year, however many cases are unreported.

In 2020, 1,750 children died from abuse and neglect in the United States.

Another statistic that I post on my nonprofit page, is that 1 in 2 children from the ages of 2-17-years old experiences some form of violence each year. This information comes from WHO (World Health Organization), this includes physical, sexual and emotional violence.

I know that growing up, my sister and I were part of the one out of two children, every, single year of our childhoods.

My mother was an abusive, alcoholic, she started abusing me and my sister when I was roughly 4 or 5-years old. She seemed to find fun in it, she would beat us for just existing.

However in her sick, evil and twisted mind, she recalls us being "bad children", she could never name anything bad we had ever done.

She denies the abuse, she even thinks that she had done nothing wrong to us. Now for me, the abuse continued, up until just a few days ago.

What happened a few days ago, on the 7th of May 2024, I had awaken at my mother's apartment. This was an apartment she shared with my 93-year old grandmother. My mother Denise, had been the caregiver for her mother for about 10-years at this time.

Little known to me and everyone else was she was still the same abusive monster she had always been. She had several run-ins with the law, being arrested in 2012 for beating the shit out of me in my own kitchen. I had been caught so off guard that I never defended myself, until after my lip was knocked threw my bottom teeth.

Sweaty, confused and punch drunk, my mom beat on me for God knows how long, I felt the sweat roll down my face and my face burned like a lit match was being drug down it.

I'm so ashamed and embarrassed about this, at 49-years old I should have never been speaking to my mother again. I can't even bring myself to list all the evil shit she's done to me.

When I was 21-years old, I lived with her when she moved from Philly (Philadelphia, Pennsylvania) to Greensboro North Carolina. I didn't move right away, I moved some time after she had relocated to the state. I remember hiding in the second bathroom, as she beat & pushed on the door to beat me. I have no idea why, I just remember her screaming then running towards me.

In an instant I was a helpless, stupid child again, I ran into the bathroom because I had no idea where to go. I remember leaving for some days to stay with people I had met down there.

When I finally returned to Philadelphia, I had no plan, no job and no idea what I was going to do. I ended up staying with a cousin for a while. I had a car, however I hadn't been making the car payments, since I had no job.

I was hit in the rear by a what was named then as Bell telephone, the local phone company of Philly back then. The car was in bad shape and needed to be repaired. I still had full coverage, I was under my mother's.

You know, when the car was finished, the repair shop was waiting for the $5,000 USD check from the insurance company. The company was in North Carolina, however I had been in contact with their Philadelphia location. Long story short, the insurance mailed the check to my mother, in her name, she cashed and kept the money. That was the end of my car.

She ended up calling the finance company, telling them where my car was, for an additional $100 USD that they gave her. They eventually had to fight for the car back and she sent me $150 USD out of the over $5,500 USD check she cashed.

She abused me and my sister our entire childhood, let us home alone often, or alone in the car while she drank in various bars.

She was arrested in December of 2012 for beating me, sentenced to 12 months probation and other things, I don't know I didn't follow up with the case. It happened again in 2014, that time my grandmother, who was in the other room told police that I hit my mom back, after she hit me.

The same police officer that arrested her in 2012, was there on the scene, Officer Ken Johnson, I remember him telling me if I pressed charges that I would also be arrested because my grandmother said I hit my mother, AFTER she hit me. I never hit my mother as she attacked me from behind, you can't hit what you can't get to.

She's harassed me, filed a protection from abuse order on me, to which as a gun owner, 3 huge Pennsylvania Sheriffs officers, in full riot gear came to my apartment. They came to take my gun, they came to fight as well, I was so nervous, I was so upset.

My license to carry was then suspended, I went to the hearing she didn't bother to show up. They dropped it, I had to come back to the court house another day to have my weapon returned to me. Then re-apply and pay again to obtain my concealed to carry permit.

Again in in 2021, January she was taking me to stay at her place, she said it would be best because a huge ice storm was supposed to hit the area. I had just had a lumpectomy (my first of 2) for breast cancer.

We made it to her parking lot, she started cursing and screaming, I wanted to go back home, I begged and cried and asked her to take me home. When we arrived she refused to take me to my apartment door, only to the upper parking lot. She had already planned to drive off while I was halfway out the car. I ended up trying to jump from the car, I failed and ended up on the cold ground on my sore breast.

She drove off, she came back as the police arrived there, he screamed at me, I have a partial video. They did nothing to help me, I was so happy because I knew that there were cameras there, I pointed to them. My mother looked up and I could see the fear on her face.

Finally, she was going to jail for what she had done to me, once again. I remember the officer screaming at me, "if she's abused you so much than why are you around her?" He continued to scream, he then said, oh she said you got out of the car and tripped and fell.

No police report, no contact card, the way this police station usually does.

I emailed the video to the police chief, he said there was no video, he said that his officer didn't do anything wrong by screaming at the victim who called him for help. He didn't scream at my mother, (who looks as if she's a white woman by the way), he didn't ask her, why she was returning to the scene.

If I had tripped and fallen out the car, why had she left?

I found out months later, there was a video, the police went to my mother's apartment, which was just a few blocks away from where I lived, in the same township and under the same police district.

Long story short, my mother once again got away with abusing me. I happened to find out there was a video from my daugther, who happened to think it was funny, she laughed and described how I looked falling out the car.

I feel so stupid for starting to speak to her again in February of 2024, where I caught her beating on my grandmother. I voice recorded my grandmother telling me how she's hit her before. Once again I didn't follow up, the police arrested her but I couldn't find someone to go to the station with me, my sister who I had told about the abuse refuses to speak to me.

As of this time, I will never in my life, speak to my mother or sister. I've reported this to elder abuse, I have emailed the recordings to the police. The next day, I awoke with texts and a voicemail of threats from my mom. I called the police, made another report and tried to get the police to call me back. They refuse to.

I am filing several reports with state agencies, I've gotten a support from abuse organization helping me out. I am also filing a PFA (protection from abuse), on my mother. I will file a state claim against the police department, I wish I can sue them but I can't get a lawyer to help me.

I have been so stupid, I have no followed up what so-ever and today, this is the result of me being lazy.

Thank you for reading 🙏🏽 Please consider buying a coffee for Lacey’s House efforts in Gender Equality & Children’s Rights.

©️TB Obwoge 2024 All Rights Reserved