Is It Okay to Love Your Kids More Than Your spouse?

by Robert Gitau about a month ago in parents

Your spouse deserves a little more love. I will tell you why.

Is It Okay to Love Your Kids More Than Your spouse?

Kids are cute, they are adorable, and they give parents a great sense of accomplishment. And, of course, loving them and attending to their needs is what makes you a good parent. But is it okay to love your kids more than your spouse? No, it is not. This is why:

1. Kids are happier when their parents are loved right

Your kids want you to love them, all right, but they will appreciate you more if you showed their dad/mom more love and compassion. This might sound a little far-fetched but, believe me, it is true. When you two love each other genuinely and show it openly, the kids feel secure and wanted. If, on the other hand, you are often hostile to your partner, the kids feel like their future in that home isn’t guaranteed. That is the last thing anyone would wish for their young kid.

If you are a single parent, you need to be very careful with whom you introduce to your kids as your lover. That person may not be their dad or mom, but they will be greatly offended if they learn that he/she doesn’t love or treat you as well as they think you deserve. Your kids will always want to see you happy in your romantic relationship.

2. You two are a team. The kids aren’t part of that team.

If you are married, your partner is your teammate. You two raise, teach, and love your kids as a team. You reason together and discipline the kids together. It is only sensible that you stand by and love your teammate at all times.

3. The kids will eventually leave you .

When they are old enough to start their own careers and families, when they have the money to rent or buy their own home, the kids will not look back. On the other hand, your husband or wife will, in most cases, be there for you for their entire lifetime.

4. Your kids DO NOT love you as much as you imagine.

Your kids love what you do for them more than they love you as a person. Sorry to remind you this but, you already know that they put you last on everything, right? Of course they are little adorable munchkins, but they can be as selfish as they are cute. Their sleep matters more than yours, they feel entitled to eat before everyone else, and they never give a hoot about when or where they poop and pee. I mean, seriously, your partner will never do any of that to you.

How to Make Your Spouse the Top Priority

1. Take a trip without the kids.

Rekindle your fading love by leaving the kids behind and taking a short romantic vacation, just the two of you! During that time, you will be free to make love whenever you feel like, wherever you choose to. You will have wonderful dinners together; just like you used to before the kids came. When you eventually return home, you will have more energy to parent.

2. Kick the kid out of your bed .

Dear moms, please understand that your cute and adorable baby is an unwanted third wheel in your bed. Your partner may not tell you this (for obvious reasons), but I will clearly spell it out for you: KEEP THE BABY OUT OF YOUR BED! Your lover wants to have an intimate moment with you and the baby is ruining that for him. If you have a toddler who crawls into your bed in the middle of the night or early in the morning, discourage him/her from doing that.

3. Be your spouse’s publicist

Make a point of praising your partner in front of your kids. Let them know that you think of their mom as the most beautiful, most astounding, and most loving woman on earth. Let them know that their dad is the strongest, wisest, and most caring human being to have ever lived. Anything to make him/her pass as a nice person is welcome.

parents
Robert Gitau
Robert Gitau
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