I'll Keep You Safe

I had a nightmare once. I heard my mothers voice crying out for help. To be left alone by whatever was after her. To this day, I can still hear her tears hit the ground beside my grandmothers house...

I ran to her. Fearlessly. It felt so real... It didnt come to mind that whatever was causing her so much fear could hurt me. It didnt matter, I ran to her. When I think about it I can still feel my feet digging into the sand behind my grandmothers house. I was almost there.

Rounding the corner, there she was... on her knees, her face cupped within' her hands and she was just... sobbing. Afraid to lift her head, she was trembling and I looked around for what she was cowering away from. My heart was racing but not because of fear, because of anger. Ready to defend her by any means, I screamed out to it.

And from behind the leaves of this prickle bush came a dark figure. Taller than the trees itself with illuminating eyes. I straightened my back and faced it head on making sure my eyes connected with his. I didnt care. "MOVE!" he yelled at me. His voice alone was a nightmare, a hiss... a deep growling hiss of a voice. His voice caused my mom to scream, and I screamed back "NO!"

He took a step back and laughed. Our conversation had to have been short because the next thing I knew he said, "Fine, you beat her then." and in that moment? I felt myself losing control of my body. An inner battle within' myself that only me and him felt. I remember a metal rod just appearing out of no where in my hand and I could feel his power trying to force me to hit her...

But I wouldn't. I fought him for what felt like hours in that nightmare. My mom crying, now fallen on her back with her hands up. Her eyes went from fearfull to cold... the image of the emotions in her eyes have been burned inside my head. She turned her face, closed her eyes, tucked her chin and waited.

"No! I wont!" I remember my skin feeling really hot and the next think I knew, he stubbled backwards and I was able to drop the pipe in my hands... I was exhuasted. Drained and I felt all of this in a dream. I remember trying to catch my breath while looking her over to make sure she was okay.

"You can't have her. Whatever it is, I'll do it. You can have me." He gathered his footing, the ground shook and before he could speak the wind started to blow so violently it started to whistle. "No! Sabrina you dont know what you're doing!" This was the first time my mom has even acknowledged me in this nightmare. And I looked at her with a smile on my face and said, "yes I do mom. Sometimes, you have to surrender to win. Im keeping you safe." And as strong as that wind blew through those tree's, my mother reached out for my arm and I was gone. Next thing I knew, I was waking up.

I was 8 years old when I had this nightmare. Not even knowing what I was saying but, thats what I said and since then to now? I still mean every word. I woke up the next morning around 4am, I was covered in sweat, my heart was racing but I wasnt afraid. I felt like I was running all night, I was winded.

I remember sneaking from my room just to peak inside hers to make sure she was okay. She was sound asleep, I remember I gave her a kiss on the head and whispered, "I'll keep you safe." before leaving her room. Till this day I have no idea why the dream happened or what it means but, it happened and if there should be another fight?

I hope he's ready.