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How can we raise our children in a safe way?

In this economy, I am wondering how we can take care of our children in the best way? How can we even afford to live? Is there a way we can still have a one income house?

By Talara NolanPublished about a month ago 4 min read
How can we raise our children in a safe way?
Photo by Ryan Lau on Unsplash

There once was a time when most households only had one income. When most households only needed one income. Yes, this was a time that most of those households were married couples with kids. Now this version of the world seems like a dream, or a fantasy. It makes me wonder if this is just Canada, or the whole world? Is it just the reality of living in Canada?

When I moved back in with my family, it was always meant to be a short term solution. Now I am looking at the fact that I have been a year. While I am not out of school yet, I have started looking at rentals in the area. Trying to figure out what my options are.

Lately I have been getting more and more depressed. I know that a large factor about that is the fact that I am not on my own. I don't like living in someone else's house, as I am use to being independent. Not having to depend on anyone. So the fact that I am living in someone else's house is not a feeling that I like.

There is also the factor that my ex always played with my head. Always telling me that I needed him to make me rich. Like I couldn't depend on myself. Even though I was the one that paid the rent when we lived together. So a part of me wants to prove him wrong, prove to him that I can do it by myself.

Now looking into it, I am left with the question if I can. Is it possible where I am to be on my own? I wonder if that is possible in this country, to be a one income household. Especially with a young child. How does any parent do it on their own?

When I started to look at rentals in the area, I was faced with the reality that rentals where I live are on average 2000. This is for places that aren't that great, even. Not amazing places to live. That's the basic minimum for rentals in the area around my daughter's school. I don't want to move her schools again. She is finally in a school that she likes, where she is comfortable. I don't want to move her. What if I move her to another school that she doesn't like as much as this one? This is my worry. However, to stay in her school district, it will cost me a lot. Being that I am in school still for another year, I just don't know if that is the best financial decision.

So I feel like I am between a rock and a hard place. I don't want to live with someone else, but I can't really afford to be on my own either. I am aware that I need to work harder, do better. I know that it's not impossible.

I listen to and read about a lot of manifesting techniques. So I know that I need to believe, believe that I already have it, believe that I am worthy. If I am being honest, I am not there yet. Though I am trying, so with some effort and focus I feel that I can get to a place where I can achieve all the things that I want to achieve. I guess I feel like I am in the middle between manifesting millions, and being worried about money.

The thing I know for sure is that I can't stress and worry that I don't have money. That alone will bring the energy into my life that I won't have money. But I just don't know how people do it and are okay with it. Especially as it's not like I live in a big city like Toronto. In fact, there are some places in Toronto that are cheaper than they are here. Which is the craziest thing that I have ever heard. I considered moving to a smaller city. However, being in a small city on my own freaks me out. Especially as I don't drive. I tried to be on my own in a city with my ex, and clearly that didn't work out so well for me. Can I really make the move on my own? I feel like that is the only way that I can live an afford reasonable life. I just feel like it's crazy to pay 2000 for a small one bedroom apartment when you are not in a large city.

Is it the place that I live that is the problem? Or is this just the economy that Canada is now?

I know that a lot of people are having to live in unique and different ways. More and more people are living with family in order to be able to control their finances better. It is becoming the norm to have unique situations. Am I the only one that thinks that is a little crazy? We should be able to live a life on our own, right? Am I wrong? Should I just accept this new reality? Or is there something that we can do about it?

-T

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About the Creator

Talara Nolan

I am a single parent to a 4 year old girl and live with her in Canada. I love working out and have lost over 45 lbs over time. I would love to share what I have learned and all the things that have worked for me over time.

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Comments (2)

  • Jane Kattabout a month ago

    It's tough out there, and your story really hits home. Balancing independence and financial reality is so challenging, especially with a child. You're not alone in feeling this way, and it's okay to feel stuck. Keep pushing forward, believe in yourself, and explore every option. Sometimes, the path isn't clear, but you're doing great by just trying to figure it out. Stay strong!

  • angela hepworthabout a month ago

    Very nuanced questions — you leave readers with a lot to contemplate, Talara. Great work.

TNWritten by Talara Nolan

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