Drunk Drivers Still Deserve to Live

Recently, on social media platforms like Twitter and Facebook, I have seen a plethora of posts stating things like, "If you drive under the influence and wreck, you deserve it." I understand the mindset behind these posts, because of the idea that it is better for other people if you wreck, because then their lives are no longer at risk. However, I do not agree with the idea that just because you make a mistake you deserve to get hurt, or potentially die.

The day before my 11th birthday, one of my older brothers, Josh, passed away in a car accident because he had been drinking and driving. He was only 24 years old. Before his body was found, we believed that he had just been missing. But we were not prepared for what we were going to find. He made a mistake, but he was not a bad person, and he did not deserve to die alone, in the cold, with no one knowing where he was for six days.

We hung missing posters around my town, hoping to God, any God that would listen, that they would help us find Josh, safe and alive. I couldn’t go into town without seeing his face plastered on walls and stop signs, even months after we found his body. I remember the board of missing people in Walmart, and for so long after he died, I continued to search for his face on those boards, knowing that it would be the closest thing I would have to seeing him again. When it came time for his viewing, my younger sister and I were not allowed to attend because my parents were scared of us being traumatized.

My brother, who was so full of love and light, passed away at 24 years old. He left behind his family who loved him more than anything. He left behind a son, who had only ever experienced death in games, where it is only temporary, who would not be able to grasp that his father wasn’t coming back. He left behind his brothers and sisters, who mourned his death every time they saw his red jacket sitting around the house, who tried to smell his cologne before it wore off forever. He left behind a father, who broke down when he mistakenly called one of our siblings by Josh’s name, screaming in pain because of the heartbreak he had to endure. He left behind a mother, a step mother, two brothers, five sisters, a son, nieces and nephews, and every person in his life that cherished every moment they spent with him.

My sister had to identify his body herself, because no one else in my family could bear to do it themselves. My parents felt so unable to arrange his funeral because they did not want to believe that their beloved son was gone. I prayed that it was all a dream, and that Josh would just show up at home as normal. Our family has suffered so much loss. But none of us deserved it. Josh did not deserve to lose his life to drunk driving, nor does he, or other people who have made the bad decision to drive after drinking, deserve to be demonized because of a mistake.

Josh made a terrible mistake and it cost him his life. Demonizing those who have lost their live while driving under the influence will not teach others to avoid it, but it will instead hurt the families of those who have passed. Instead of saying that people deserve to lose their lives because of drunk driving, just let your loved ones know that you would rather pick them up than let them drive under the influence. And, never forget to let them know that they are loved.