What is the secret to always be growing in all aspects of life?

I think it’s having the right mindset.

Or, to be more specific, changing the way you think if you’re not happy with where you are right now. This may be due to your progress in studies, the types of goals you have or wish you had, the frustration you feel because you can’t solve a problem that’s been bothering you for some time, feeling stressed out about making a good impression in your new job, and so on.

Of course, having the right mindset doesn’t just happen automatically. You need to be open to the idea that you can change your mindset, just like you can change anything about your life if you want to. This is a powerful way to think about life in general because you will feel that it is something you can control instead of it controlling you.

So now the question is this: how do you change your mindset in order to grow in all aspects of your life?

I’ll give 5 examples.

1. Make your mindset all about growth.

Yes, I keep writing about it constantly, but there’s good reason for it. I am obsessed with the concept of growth mindset. Ever since reading Carol Dweck’s book on this topic, I’ve completely changed my attitude about what the human brain is capable of. It’s a simple yet powerful distinction. There are two types of mindsets, fixed and growth. A fixed mindset is when you believe you’re born with a set of skills and abilities that are part of your DNA and cannot be changed, whereas a growth mindset is when you work on building new skills and habits continually over time.

For the past six years, I’ve used my own life as a growth mindset experiment. It’s taught me so much! I revamped my professional life and now love the work that I do. I improved my personal life and started appreciating my friendships and partnerships. I also incorporated new habits like running, working out, going on morning walks, having a gratitude practice. And, most important to me, I write every day. Small things, big things, articles, e-books, answers on Quora. Writing keeps me disciplined, focused, and motivated. It makes me feel the most alive!

2. Decide to stop a negative habit if it doesn’t make you feel good.

I’m sure you know where your weaknesses lie. Some people smoke, others can’t say no to a friend’s invitation to binge drink at the local bar, and there are many of us who are hooked on eating desserts in large quantities. The bigger question is not why, but who’s in charge here? If we’re going to be completely honest, the only one in charge is (and always should be) YOU.

So let’s figure out a way to get rid of a bad habit. If you have a nagging feeling that you’re doing something that’s not beneficial to you, step one is to acknowledge there’s a problem. If you create an awareness instead of stay in denial, this will allow you to move on to step two — figuring out what to do about it. Create a plan to attack it in stages. Reduce the amount of junk food you have each week, go to bed 30 minutes earlier than usual, or talk to a friend who has quit smoking and ask how they did it. What’s step three? Keep pushing yourself, stay disciplined every day even if it means you’ll be proactive 5 minutes at a time.

3. Start something new that takes you outside your comfort zone, even for 10 minutes a day.

I tried many new things that I wouldn’t have contemplated when I was a college student. Running, for example. I thought it was for people who are extremely athletic and who have extraordinary lung capacity. But I started the Couch to 5k program and eventually ran for 45 minutes to an hour without stopping — and it was enjoyable! Another great example is meditation. I thought it meant you have to sit in complete silence, with eyes closed, for hours. But with my mind being so busy, I couldn’t possibly do it. Then I started a 10-minute guided meditation with the Head-space app, and now it’s one of the best parts of my day.What can you do that’s new, different, perhaps something you’ve always been curious to try out? Explore what that is for you. Go and do the research. Find an app to track your progress. Talk to someone who’s an expert in that field. Start with baby steps — try the new activity for 10 minutes a day, and add it to your weekly schedule. Push yourself. Experiment with it. Grow.

4. Commit to improving something about yourself, starting today.

Making an improvement in one aspect of your life can be a fresh beginning, an opportunity to work on becoming a better, wiser, more focused, more thoughtful version of you. This better version of you means different things to different people. What is better for me is perhaps not interesting to you, and that’s OK. The important part is to figure out what YOU think this better version of you looks like. Start there. Visualize it. Who would this version of you be? Someone with a bad ass job? A PhD in big data analytics? A personal trainer or life coach? An entrepreneur?

Next, be honest with yourself. How bad do you want to become this version of you? If you really are dedicated to it, you’re more likely to achieve it. After that, what will it take to get you there — what’s the recipe? Write down what you’ll need. Research it. Talk to people who will encourage you on your quest and who are also going through something similar; there is tremendous power in sharing goals with others. And then get after it: do something every single day that will get you closer to where you want to be.

5. Focus on what you have, instead of experiencing FOMO.

FOMO — the “fear of missing out”— is a real struggle for many people. We are social creatures, so it’s no surprise that we look to one another to see how we stack against people in our social circle. This is nothing new. But with smartphones and social media taking over our daily life, our social circle no longer includes just our family, friends, classmates, co-workers, and neighbors. We are part of a global community and that means we compare ourselves with everyone who has a Twitter, Tik Tok, or Instagram account. It’s a big world out there!

The downside to all this? By witnessing the lives of others that seem perfect or at least super interesting, we become increasingly frustrated with our own. We see only what we don’t have, where we aren’t traveling, what we haven’t achieved, how much money isn’t in our bank account. So how to change this point of view? A simple way is to incorporate a 5-minute gratitude practice into your day. Write down 3 things (they can also be people, experiences, and even pets) you are grateful for having in your life right now. Turn it into a small daily ritual that can change how you think about life and help you grow as a human being.

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