How Online School Became My Enemy...
How I went from Imaginative and Productive to unmotivated and stressed.
I don't get stressed easily. It's going to take work and hella obstacles to make me feel like I have so much on my shoulders that I just play video games for the rest of the week. (Sorry! This one was late. I had tings to attend to. ;))
Online school in the 11th grade made me realize that "Going to School" It just... It's not as bad. The last time I was in a classroom, I couldn't wait to do online school. I would be able to do my daily plans that I schedule every day for myself. I wouldn't have to wait half the day to do the things I actually love. The things I actually love learning about. I recall getting on the bus to go home and relax for Mardi Gras break and walking home with my step-brother.... or was it, my step-father?
1st DAY OF HOUSE ARREST
When the announcement came out, Me: Elated. I felt like this was a blessing in disguise. This was my opportunity to put my personal work first and do school later. To make my own schedule. To not deal with any more self-entitled teachers. To at least... breathe. The one thing that I know would annoy me is my brothers playing video games all night. (God, I hated that)
1-3 WEEKS IN ISOLATION
The first few weeks of quarantine were fine. Everyone was saying we were going back to school in a couple of days, or after the break. So far, I watched Frozen 2 with my family, learned some new songs, WROTE some new songs, enjoyed some movies in the dark while binge eating, my room was like my comfort zone. I never left and it made me feel safe. It gave me inspiration. I did everything in my old room: cried, stressed, get mad, be excited, made some great songs, something about that room was magical, but that's for another vocal story.
1 WEEK LATER
After my school district announced that "In-person" school was canceled, I paid no mind in online school. I thought I would do one or two assignments, and just get on with my life. At this time, I was practicing a new song I wanted to put out. I wanted to go to the studio and record it, but was my Mom having it? Um. Hell No. Thinking back, this quarantine thing made me think a lot about the wisest marketing decisions when it came to the music industry.
A COUPLE WEEKS AFTER THAT
Soon, Online schools forced their way into the party uninvited. By this time, I have released my two singles and achieved much more. I felt ready. Now, of course, like any other school, the first day was the easiest day ever. Turning on our cameras was not a requirement. It was just an ordinary day, you know, not doing anything important.
3 DAYS INTO ONLINE SCHOOL
Everything was going fine. I started to keep up a schedule and whatever. One of my teachers was annoying, assigning us unnecessary mandatory work. Everyone else, EASY assignments. Maybe one or two, here and there. It was whatever. Easy. Quick. I was able to not spend half the day doing school work and be able to make time for myself.
THE FOLLOWING WEEKS
I kept up a really good pace with my work. I even challenged myself harder by entering an online competition for an elective. (My challenge was writing a whole theatre play. Last year when I entered, it took me three weeks. In the 2020 compeition, took me a week in a half.) I was eating, taking care of myself, and sleeping well, and making myself proud (best feeling ever!). Then soon, my foot gave up on me aaaand it broke... :).....(I just wanted you to know.)
After days full of eating my "Hot Cheeto: Macaroni And Cheese" while watching CoryxKenshin play "Detroit become human", things were going on outside of school. I had to pack or get rid of everything in my room to move across the country. Alabama to Seattle baaaby. That's when things started getting a little out of control....
I think it was a weekend when we flew for 5-6 hours straight WITH masks on the entire day. It was hard saying goodbye to my grandmother and my mother's friends, but I know moving to a better place means more opportunities to reach my life goals. I made a new schedule for myself for school since the time zones were different. I had to get up at 4 AM and go to sleep at 7 pm. For the first couple of weeks, it was fine. I was staying in a hotel, I had a desk to work at. Now, I started losing determination once I moved into my new house. I kept at my 4 AM schedule for a couple of days, until I started to notice I was losing sleep. Strike #1.
In Seattle, I have relatives I have never seen before: Cousins, Uncles, Aunts, etc. After our 3 week quarantine, we had company over. I was jubilant to everyone, especially the cousins. The problem was, I had to go to bed while they were over. I remember I was laying down while everyone else was awake and active, feeling upset and over this whole online school thing.
The house is so f**king scary when it's dark. That one teacher was pissing me off. All up in our business. I thought about it, "I don't attend a live class in 3rd period." It's not f**king up my grade...sooooo. Ha, yeah. Good riddence.
WHY WE DON'T TALK
It sucks when your most favorite subject has the worst teacher. Honestly, ALL OF MY OTHER teachers are simple. Do a worksheet or watch a PowerPoint and go on about your day. It felt like they respected my time. I respect them for that. But...it's always that one teacher. THIS.....demon assigned us a "Bellwork" where you have to retype some sentinces into the correct format. If you even THINK about not putting a comma, it's going to assume that your are dumb as hell and report it back to the teacher. (Oh my God, I would get so pissed at this.) Then, you are assigned to type for 15-20 minutes without stopping (it doesn't matter if you think or run out of ideas) and submit it after you are done. It got annoying after my teacher started making us type about random topics from articles that literaly NO ONE reads. THEN, you are assigned 1-3 things to do. I once gotten super annoyed with a story that no one in the class read because...who the hell even heard of this story? I wanted the wake the whole damn neighborhood up and do a report on how many people does it take to make teachers realize that no one wants to read this damn play? The latest thing I have done was a essay about America. At this time, people were storming the capital and vandalizing everything in sight. I really didn't want to write about this, I would go off. Knowing what's comfortable for me, I wanted to go work ahead and compleate the essay early as possible so I won't have any other projects shoved down my throat from other teachers. Nope. Not happening. My teacher locked the project so that you won't turn it in. Okay. Very thoughtful. VERY CUTE.
After weeks of being stressed over this essay, I finnaly wrote it. It wasn't so bad. Maybe because I was listening to Japanese city pop while slaving away to this stupid excuse for an assignment. At that point, two of my teachers assigned a PowerPoint project. I had noooo problem doing my Media Studies project. It was fun.
RIGHT WHEN I TURNED IN MY ESSAY.
THE TEACHER ASSIGNED US A PROJECT.
IT WAS EXPETED TO BE COMPLEATE IN 3. FREAKING. DAYS.
But, Good news. I withdrew from school before I even had the chance to click "PowerPoint"
I read what it was about....
I swear, I thought they wanted to live with me. ALL UP OUR ASS. "List what you have been doing" "List what have you been thinking" How about you list it since I sent you a whole DM on why my work wasn't being turned in due to stress. You are just adding fuel to the fire. BAbY.
Glad I'm gone. School is going to make me want to start doing...nevermind. I'm supposed to be going to school around my area. Hopefully, they are not lie that one class. The only things I missed about my past school was the vibes and my Drama teacher. :(. I have a week before I start again, but under no circumstances, is me an Online school cool enough to be "Friends." Ok? Everytime I see her, it's on sight.
*Sorry this is so late. New Vocal is coming out tomorrow.