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How Childhood Affects Life

The Attachment Theory

By NiksPublished 10 months ago 4 min read
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According to the attachment theory, it's crucial for our development during the first few years of life that we form a close emotional and physical link with one primary caregiver. We feel safe to explore the world if our attachment is strong and our link is strong. We are aware that there is always a secure foundation from which we can never go. When our link is frail, we experience insecure attachment. We are apprehensive about leaving or discovering a seemingly terrifying environment. Since we are unsure if we can come back. Securely attached individuals are said to have better trust, be more able to connect with others, and as a result, be more successful in life. People who are insecurely attached frequently harbor suspicion toward others, are unsocial, and struggle to build relationships. The three varieties of insecure attachments are anxious/ambivalent, anxious/avoidant, and anxious/disorganized. There is only one type of safe attachment. The first three respond to discomfort in an orderly way, while the final responds in an unorganized way. Let's examine Mr. and Mrs. Smith, who are parents to four kids, to better comprehend the notion. Amy, Joe, Ann, and Luka. The Smiths are excellent parents who hold their children close, make frequent eye contact, speak kindly, and snuggle with them.But Mr. Smith passes away after becoming very ill. Now, Mrs. Smith's life is exceedingly challenging. She works all day long while also attempting to look after her kids. and an impossibility. At the age of six, Luka's brain has largely matured, his character is solid, and his worldview has taken shape. The new circumstance doesn't really bother him because he knows his mother will always be there to provide a safe haven. He feels firmly anchored. Later, he matures into a young guy who is trustworthy and upbeat. His view of himself is favorable. Ann, a 3-year-old, struggles to adjust to the change in focus. Ann notices that her mother's behavior has changed. She becomes clinging as a result of her relationship anxiety.She has to get more passionate and shout to catch her mother's attention. When her mother eventually responds in a manner that is expected, she displays ambivalence and hides her genuine emotions. Others later in life perceive Ann as erratic or moody. She has a negative self image. Her manner of attachment Anxious Ambivalent. Joe, a 2-year-old, spends his days with his uncle, who adores him but believes that being harsh is necessary for a proper education. Little Joe's Uncle becomes irate and occasionally punitive if he displays excessive emotion or is too loud. That terrifies Joe. He discovers that in other situations as well, he must suppress his emotions in order to avoid expressing fear.He uses this approach as an adult but finds it difficult to start partnerships. His self-perception is largely negative. He is an anxious, avoidant person. Amy, a one-year-old child, is sent to a nursery. There, the crew is undertrained, overworked, and frequently under a lot of stress. Some are downright violent. Amy consequently develops anxiety about the exact individuals she wants protection from, resulting in a conflict that completely disassembles her conceptions of love and security. She tries to stay away from all social events since she is experiencing terror that isn't going away. She no longer feels deserving of love as an adult. Her perception of herself is quite poor. He is anxious and disorganized. In the first few years of life, when we are still too young to express our anxiety and may thus be under a lot of stress, our attachments are established. The stress hormones adrenaline and cortisol are then produced by our adrenal gland, an organ that is located above our kidneys. We become more alert when our heart rate and blood pressure rise. Toxic stress is the term used when that occurs repeatedly. Toxic because it stunts a child's brain growth and compromises their immune system.Toxic stress can even change the expression of genes in embryos or at a very young age, which can have long-term effects on human health. Even at the age of one, we can evaluate an attachment type by simulating a Strange Situation. To do this, we allowed the child to play with their mothers in a room for a short period of time. The child is then left unattended. The child's response to her mother coming back is the crucial moment. Children that are securely linked generally give their mothers a hug before they can settle down and resume playing. Children with weak attachments may exhibit ambivalence and avoidance.Some people won't stop sobbing or won't keep playing. It is commonly known that our relationship throughout the early years has long-term implications. Researchers at Minnesota University were able to predict with 77% accuracy, using the hypothesis, if a child would drop out of high school as early as age 3. Harvard University students were asked to rate how close to their parents they felt in a different survey. They were questioned about their health 35 years later. 91% of people who reported having a strained relationship with their mother also experienced health problems, such as drinking, hypertension, and coronary artery disease. Only 45% of individuals who had said they had a warm relationship were diagnosed as having bad health. But there's another reason to pay extra attention to the early years. They serve as the foundation for later behaviors. At age 2, a child who feels firmly linked can develop friends in kindergarten. With every interaction, they reinforce their worldview and gain optimism. They develop strong friendships as a result, which they later use at work. Children that are really insecurely attached may miss out on this chance. According to rumors, attachment theory pioneer and psychologist John Bowlby once said, "What cannot be communicated to the mother, cannot be communicated to the self." To put it another way, those who feel insecurely attached could not fully comprehend who they are. They might need to travel far back in time in order to understand who they are and how they feel.

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Niks

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