Taurus - The Serial Killer Sign
In our defense, we have Shakespeare!
The moment I knew I was a special star child was when I was in Sedona, AZ and a couple of psychics asked me if I was a cusp because I have Taurus traits, but I also like reading.
"What's that?" I asked.
"Were you born around the 20th of May?"
Dammit, these women knew me! "That's my birthday exactly!" I said, giving them $20 to tell me more.
Up to this point, the only things I knew about my birthday were a) I was a Taurus, b) I have the same birthday as Cher, and c) Anne Boleyn got her head chopped off the day before...give or take 500 years.
That's before I found out I share the cusp with Jeffrey Dahmer (born May 21). And on the other end of Taurus, Hitler was born right smack on April 20.
Ah, goddammit, H. H Holmes is pure Taurus. I already share Chicago with him.
And maybe being in the sign of serial killers isn't such a bad thing:
So basically, if you've got any Taurus friends, maybe it's time to keep them at a distance.
I mean yeah, please do not come within six feet of me. And I am an introvert, so I'm not against this.
But as an analytical, calculating Taurus, I have something to say before I retreat to do suspicious things.
Hear me out. Have you ever considered that maybe Taurus serial killers are just the worst at getting caught?
Apparently, our dark side is evil and manipulative, but hear me out.
Another trait of Taurus is we can be lazy and self-indulgent. We can be egotistical, but egotistical + lazy? = Avoidable mistakes. And all zodiac signs have their character flaws, so I'm good roasting myself. I am a stubborn asshole. It's true.
Allow me to tell you about our most famous Taurus serial killer, H.H Holmes. This originally was going to be a list of the ridiculous ways Tauruses have been caught, but we gotta blast H.H Holmes.
So even if you're not buying it and you think I'm trying to steer everyone's attention away from the smell coming from my basement, you'll at least get a great laugh before wondering about the implication of your own star sign.
The Real Reason No One Ever Checked Out of the Murder Hotel
H.H Holmes is the dude with the murder hotel during the Chicago World Fair. He was cold, cunning, and a genius who used his mind for evil and lured 200+ people into his hotel to trap them in the basement.
Yeah, that's not true. Well, it is based on truth. He was definitely evil to the brim, but he gets way too much credit. Holmes was not only a serial killer. He was a conman. He was a bad conman. His name wasn't even Holmes. It was Herman Mudgett.
The entire inflated story has only obscured the stories of his true victims. In fact, it took me way more effort than it should have to find them. This list also includes potential victims, but it notes that it isn't confirmed. This article goes into more detail and is where I got a lot of my information.
For one, his hotel was never finished. And no one was lured into it. The hotel was another fraud scheme of his to win over more investors. The building? It wasn't even a hotel! The first floor consisted of storefronts, the second were residential apartments (not torture chambers), and the third eventually became the unfinished hotel which was closed during the World Fair for asbestos.
No one ever checked out because no one ever checked in.
The entire reason this story took off was the general public didn't have access to much else other than inflated stories in newspapers. And it is totally fair. The records weren't seen by anyone until Adam Seltzer got his hands on them in 2014. So this is still newish information.
First of all, he constantly made up new stories about himself. At first, he confessed to killing nine. Then, he confessed to 27. Not only that. Some of the people he confessed to murdering were still alive. It is totally possible he killed more than the confirmed 9 and probably likely. But considering Holmes was asked to inflate the number for money, said 27, and couldn't even come up with 27 dead people, it isn't likely the number was much higher than 9.
Why? Hearst Newspaper promised him cold, hard cash for a more marketable story. And by 1943, an entire legend had been woven. And because it sounds way more interesting than what happened, it is still being told as if fact.
Once a victim found a room, there were any number of ways the room might kill them. Some rooms were gas chambers meant to asphyxiate anyone who wandered in, while other people were burned to death by flamethrowers embedded in the walls. There were rooms with pits of acid, rooms to be hanged in, rooms for suffocation, and one with a stretching rack.
I will tell you, Herman Mudgett would love how his story has evolved into a messed up level of Super Mario World.
When he was in medical school, he regularly stole cadavers so he could sell them. And it was known. He'd steal them, disfigure them, make their deaths look like an accident, annnnd then take an insurance policy out on them.
This was all good and fine, but then he promised to marry a woman and was already married. He led her on, and at this time, this was a big legal no-no. He ended up being successfully defended by a few members on the school board.
The kicker is after graduating, he told one of the guys who defended him, "Yeah, lol. I did that."
He was already wanted when he moved to Chicago for fraud and you know, stealing cadavers. People already knew he was a "clodhopper" as one of my earlier linked sources will tell you. He didn't avoid detection by being charming or charismatic. The dude was on borrowed time as it was.
What IS true is that he certainly modified the building with a crematorium, trap doors, secret passages, and false walls before marketing the hotel to World Fair attendees. Why? Who the hell knows. It wasn't to lure people in. He hid a ton of lumber he never paid for in the passageways and secret rooms. It isn't out of character. Making a building a murder machine wasn't his style. In fact, the hotel could never open because creditors repossessed the furniture on that floor.
We only know of one fair attendee Holmes killed: His fiancee's sister. The other victims were murdered over the course of a few years. He knew all of them. He would date a woman, have her add him to her insurance policy, and then murder her. On a loop. He had a pattern of saying, "She went to California" whenever someone asked about her. A majority of his victims were manipulated and murdered for their money. The others were because he was worried they knew too much, a few of them children. They weren't random.
So how did he get caught? He stole a horse.
The first time he was caught was after he stole a horse and sold it after he torched the "hotel" for the insurance policy and skipped town. Note he torched the hotel when the World Fair was at its peak.
Holmes, always one to make the best of things, talked his cellmate Marion into yet another insurance fraud: Borrowing $10,000 and faking his own death before giving Marion a chunk of the money. Of course, Marion thought this was a fantastic idea, and went along with it. Marion agreed, but would later assist the police after being pissed never seeing any money.
The insurance company was understandably suspicious. Holmes apparently not being able to play dead very well. But he ditched Marion after that.
When that plan fell through after the insurance company expressed suspicion, Holmes talked Pitezel into faking his death instead.
Well, surprise, Holmes was lying about the whole "faking" thing and murdered him, trying to get insurance yet again.
Holmes then killed Pitezel's three children and attempted to kill his wife. Finally, this led to Holmes' capture.
There are several details I omitted for length reasons, but Holmes was not a cunning serial killer. He was a fraud who killed out of greed and desperation. This is substantiated by public records, and because he got sued a lot, he left a paper trail.
England had Jack the Ripper, and all the US came up with is an overblown conman. Sounds about on brand.
Wait, isn't this about star signs?
Originally this article was a list of Taurus serial killers, and I heavily debated continuing because their victims need their stories told too, and I may write a second about them. But there's something about how Holmes has so much sensationalism surrounding him that made for a way better article.
I love reading my horoscope as much as the next Millennial. And honestly, my natal chart is creepily accurate, but when things like Capricorns being denied housing and Virgos being denied jobs happen, we have to take a step back and critically think.
If you look closely at articles that say, "Most Serial Killers are Tauruses," they debunk themselves. First off, the person who posted the original "study" is a horror writer (respect. I am too). There's nothing scientific about it. Second, "most" implies more than half of serial killers are Taurus, and if you scroll down, you'll notice 10 serial killers are listed as Taurus. This means there should be less than ten between the rest of the signs combined.
I had more than ten by the end of Pisces serial killers, but to make my point, there are 63 serial killers listed in total. 10 is only 16% of that. You can say Taurus has the highest percentage, but "most" isn't true.
When it comes to numbers, there are always things that can impact those numbers. Like I said, maybe Tauruses are terrible at getting caught! We don't know the true amount of serial killers.
And before brushing it off as, "Pft. No one takes that seriously," consider that our perceptions shape reality, so, as ridiculous as it is, it could become an issue. Stereotypes aren't born; they're made.
Overall, our research disentangles stereotypes from social reality by providing a real-world demonstration that stereotypes can form without preexisting social reality, yet still produce discrimination that can then shape social reality.
There's nothing wrong with relating to your sign. Hell, I do. But we take it too far when we write articles about certain signs being inherently emotionally abusive. This is like BPD stigma, but sparkly. I've already written about the harm of being unjustly painted as manipulative from my own experience. Accusing someone of being abusive is not something to be taken lightly no matter what their zodiac sign is.
There's nothing wrong with relating to stories or being entertained by stories, but it is always important to remember sometimes those stories obscure real people with real feelings. Holmes' true victims were hidden behind inflated numbers and fiction.
If you brush aside someone who is a Scorpio, actually, that may be my mom. Please return her. Thanks.
My point is to look out for sensationalism. Question everything. Sometimes, especially in Holmes' case, the devil truly IS in the details. And I'm not enraged about this. Actually, I took this as an opportunity to encourage critical thinking using something we're all familiar with because oftentimes, headlines are just as inaccurate.
Checkmate! You came for the serial killers and you're leaving with knowledge. Hmm. Maybe we are good at luring people in.
But before I depart, I did get a chuckle out of this line. It is my personal favorite.
But, if you just so happen to have any relatives or close friends who are extremely meticulous about their cleaning products, watch a lot of CSI, and happen to be a Taurus, you might want to keep a close eye on them.
I suck at cleaning and prefer Forensic Files, thank you very much.