Next, Again. The Next Time.

When I quit my executive job at the club a while back, I did it with my family in mind. I was killing myself with long days, hardly seeing my children, and falling asleep when I was actually home. I took a position that had me at work only four shifts per week, and I would be at home with my family on four nights. For a cook/chef, whatever you want to call it, those are hours that are unheard of, and I left for it in a hurry.

Eight months later, I find myself in the opposite predicament. I’m pursuing the illustrious hours of a business owner. My wife and I have created an amazing life together, and we are adding to it with a restaurant of our own. This has been in the works since October, and I assure you I have had trouble keeping it under wraps. I have told certain family, friends, and random people on the street, but we have chosen to keep this quiet because there are so many things that can go wrong.

My wife and I have not bad, but not good credit, little in savings or retirement, currently no income, mountains of debt, and a dream. The last part of that is what we used when creating our business plan, and that plan is what is scrutinized more so than any of the former credit woes when it comes to getting financed for a business. After several revisions, a multitude of meetings, talks, Zooms, signatures, and spreadsheets—with the help of an amazing man at the SBA, we are closer than ever to completion. No, I’m not going to tell you more than that just yet, we still have yet to close on the purchase, and until then, much like when buying a house, there are still things that could go wrong.

Ok, I’ll tell you some more right now. Even with over seven years of recovery, I still have fears. I doubt myself, and I think constantly that somebody or something will prevent this from happening. This is even now, after receiving our pre-approval letter for financing, our letter of intent being accepted as an offer for the purchase, and holding in my hand the purchase agreement and lease. I could erase all fear and doubt by simply signing this paper that would forever change our lives. But I can’t just yet, because all of the people that are in on this with me—the bank, the SBA, SWIF, and certain family, friends, and investors, all agree that we should take our time and get the wording just right before we sign everything.

All my life I’ve acted on impulse. Some-the corrections system, my mom, the public in general—might say that I have some impulse-control issues. I might agree with that. The purchase agreement is a shiny object that could make a restaurant ours, and I want to sign it yesterday, but there are issues that could cost us an extra $18,000 per year if I don’t try to negotiate it so something more manageable. This is currently the biggest issue we are facing: triple-net lease, or not.

There is one more thing. As per the pre-approval, we are required to put in our own injection of cash in the amount of $25,000. As I stated above, we don’t have this kind of money floating around, so we have resorted to asking family and friends for help, and the response has been incredible, but we aren’t quite there yet. We will be resorting to crowdsourcing in the next few days to see if we can wrangle up the last few $K’s. Most of what we have received has been in the form of no-interest loans, or gifts, and I am still just humbled as I’m writing this that people believe in Amanda and I enough to help in this way.

Just over five years from my release from prison, you who have followed my story have seen some incredible things. Well, I’m just getting started. This next phase is going to be a lot more we than me, and I’m going to conquer my fears and doubts and have an even more unbelievable story to tell you over the next year as we change our lives yet again for the betterment of our family. This is next. This is us. This is our future. Walk with us.

I’ll write another post when things are more official, with great detail and pictures. Until then, remain on the edge of your seats.