Maggie's Obsession

The first time I saw her was on the school bus. She was the last stop and I was the first so I had to wait the whole bus ride to see her. She wore black buckle shoes, a denim dress with a red and white striped shirt underneath and a marigold flower pin in her hair.

On the third day of school she sat next to me on the bus. I was too shy to say hello but she wore pink tennis shoes, purple pants, a Mickey Mouse sweater and a marigold flower pin in her hair.

I didn’t learn her name until two years later when we started the fifth grade, we had both been placed into Ms. Leedey’s class.

Abigale. It was a much prettier name than mine. Why my mother had chosen to call me Margaret I don't know. Abigale came into the class and I felt myself grin. I didn’t know why, I suppose for the same reason I had always grinned when she stepped onto the bus. Abigale had a way of bringing life to a room. She walked into the room that day no differnt. She wore white sketcher tennis shoes, blue jeans, a brown cotton shirt with a small pocket on the front and a marigold flower pin in her hair. Abigale seemed like the kind of person that was always ready for the next new thing and I was terrified of everything...fifth grade included.

When fifth grade ended I didn’t see Abigale for three more years. After primary school I assumed she went to one of the other middle schools in our town. I didn’t forget about her though. I made her my happy place. I said I was afraid of the fifth grade but it was middle school that I should have been truly fearful of. I walked the two miles to school every day to avoid the people on the bus who would throw pencil top erasers at my head and bet money on how many seats they could get too on the bounce back. I would make sure to arrive at school at least half an hour early before any other students got there especially for the sake of one girl in particular, Lauren Nicholas. She would wait by the front door, the only entrance to that god forsaken school. She carried around a jar of tampons soaked in Kool-aid and dropped them on the ground as I walked passed. They were the furthest thing from realistic and it wasn’t even a clever prank but for some reason everyone thought it was the funniest thing in the world. So yes, I would go to my first period class early and wait for the morning bell. I ate lunch in the bathroom stall until they found me there too. After that Ms. Hogan let me eat in the faculty break room. I liked that, it was quiet. On the days I was late though or when Ms. Hogan was away I would go to my happy place, I would go to Abigale. I pictured her in my mind, I smelt marigolds wrapped in strawberry shampoo. I didn't know if she still used strawberry shampoo. I only remembered from that time she sat next to me on the bus on the third day of third grade.

When 9th grade came around I knew there was only one high school in the whole town which meant Abigale and I would be going to the same school again. The building was easy to navigate, I made it through most of my classes relatively unnoticed, and it was a blend of three schools now so not everyone knew I was the laughing stock yet. With each class I walked into I scanned the room optimistically. I was beginning to lose hope until I walked into the last period of the day and saw her in the back row. She was wearing soft tan boots up to her calves with black leggings, a thin hooded white shirt that was almost long enough to be a dress, and a marigold flower pini in her hair. I took the empty seat next to her...still the bravest thing Iv’e done in my life to this day.

“Hey you went to Cedar Springs Elementary right? She had talked to me. Abigale had talked to me.

“Uh yeah” I shuttered back

“What's your name?”

“Margaret” I had said, cringing at my own name inside my head

“Is that what you go by or do like Marge? Maggie?”

“Maggie,” I said. I had never been called that before and I wasn't so much answering her as I was just repeating it but it sounded nice on her lips.

“Maggie, nice to meet you I’m Abigale” She smiled and the bell rang.

That was the first and only thing I ever said to Abigale Green throughout high school. I learned her last name was Green half way through the semester and never forgot it. No one had ever said hello to me on the first day of school, no one had ever asked me my name just to know it, no one had ever smiled at me...except for Abigale Green.

After that first day the teacher gave us assigned seating, of which I was not next to Abigale. I didn’t have another class with her throughout the rest of highschool. One day in our junior year though I saw her walk through the commons in a cheer uniform. I hadn’t known she was a cheerleader. I went to every football game after that and watched her. I wondered if she was a s happy as she looked. She wore plain white tennis shoes, cotton socks with frilled edges, a short red and yellow striped skirt, a sleeveless top matching in color with a tiger insignia on the chest, and a marigold flower pin in her hair.

I didn't go to college. I took up photography, made a living out of it that was good enough to get by, even built myself a website and got business cards with a fancy font… Memories by Maggie. I hated the name but the name was for the part of the job I didn't like...the people. I liked being a photographer because I got to make people still.

It had been seven years since graduation when I got the call.

“Hello” I answered the phone

“Hi, is this Maggie with Memories by Maggie?” the woman's voice sang on the other line

“Yes it is, how may I help you?”

“I don’t know if you’ll recognize the name, this is Abigale Green. We went to highschool together”

I could hear my heartbeat in my skull.

“Yeah… No, I remember the name” I stammered.

“Cool. So I’m actually calling because I'm back in town for my wedding. Thought it would be nice to have the ceremony in the town me and my fiance both grew up in. I was really hoping for a local photographer and someone from the grocery store said you did a shoot for her kids so I looked you up and thought it was so crazy that not only were you local but we went to the same school”

“Yeah that is...small world. And congratulations on the engagement”

“Oh thanks. So I’d love to meet up and discuss if you’re up for it”

I met Abigale Green that weekend. We met at a coffee shop as mundane as that was. She wore blanck flip flops, blue jeans capris, a baby blue v-neck t-shirt, and a marigold flower pin in her hair. We talked about wedding expectations and a little bit about old teachers but the rest of our conversing was done here and there over the phone until the day of the wedding.

I Arrived early to get photos of the venue before it was overrun with guests which, mind you, didn't take long. Abiglae had a lot of friends. When I got word that the ceremony was starting soon I made my way into the main hall. Everybody was set up, people in their seats, minister at the podium, bridesmaids on either side. She had mentioned that she was marrying a woman and that she hoped that wouldn't be a problem. I told her of course it wouldn't be. But when I looked at the altar at the bride, the one Abigale would be marrying. I felt a rage inside of me that I had never known before.

Lauren Nicholas was standing dressed in white waiting for someone that was way too good for her. I felt my blood run cold and my knuckles turn white as the grip my hands had on my camera came close to breaking it.

I left before Abigale walked down the aisle that day. I left and I waited in my car in the rain screaming at nothing and everything that my life was. How could she be so stupid Abigale was smarter than that, better than that i knew she was because she had to be. I left, I waited, and then I followed them.

They were staying at a hotel at the edge of town. I watched them go into a bottom floor room laughing both in beautiful white dresses and marigold flower pins in their hair. I didn't like seeing that pin in Lauren’s hair; it was deceiving, a wolf in sheep's clothing. Lauren pulled Abigale on her back piggy back style, Abigale laughed and squealed. I watched her headband fashioned with a white veil fall to the ground as they stepped into the room.

The rest of that night was a blur of rage, of passion, of a necessary evil. I remember picking up the veiled headband and placing it in my hair, it smelled like strawberry shampoo. I remember going to the front desk and flirting with the man there. I don't think I have ever flirted with anyone in my life. But I was acting from a different place within myself “oh I'm such a ditz, I forgot my room key at the reception. My name is Abigale Green. '' I threw in a fake giggle to really seal the deal .”I mean Abigale Nicholas now. You remember me from earlier right? You mind giving me a spare room key?” He folded easy. The rest I don't remember. Just glimpses.

I remember a picture of the room, it was a nice room. I remember the TV was on.

And then I remember the Image of Abigale Green laying on the bed wearing nothing but the blood that ran from her throat and a marigold flower pin in her hair.

…………………………………..

I didn't remember these images until I heard about Abigale on the news. They had said two newlywed women were found murdered in their hotel room hours after their wedding. I have no recollection of Laurens death but I didn’t put it past myself. I was saddened by Abigale’s death but a life with Lauren Nicholas would have been much worse to endure. Still I wanted to honor Abigale despite her poor life decisions.

I spent many years trying to think of a way to do this properly. I'll be it much of that time was spent waiting for the police to show up. But they never did. I was never caught.

It has been 25 years since Abigale’s death. And I have honored her. I live a simple, quiet life like she deserved. I bought a cottage home far away from the hustle bustle of the city, a home with 200 acres of open fields filled with potential.

I planted 200 hundred acres of marigold flowers for Abigale Green.