Why Do I Feel So Pressured to Tip More?

I decided to treat myself to a blowout. The stylist did a good job. I was happy. So I tipped her exactly 20 percent. Yet, she gave me this look that basically said, “Is that all?”

I wasn’t imagining things. She really looked unhappy with the tip. So, after leaving the blow dry bar, I went over in my head whether or not the gratuity should have been larger. I came to the conclusion that no, it was the right amount.

She only spent 30 minutes on my hair. I don’t have extensions. My hair isn’t long (just past shoulder length.) Maybe if I had major extensions and really long thick hair that took an hour to style, I could see it. But not in this case. And I refuse to feel pressured to leave more money.

Then, it happened again. Different scenario, same result. I was at this ice cream/candy store. The girl behind the counter put a half pound of fudge into a box for me, that‘s all. On the screen, it gave you the different choices for a tip. Literally, the girl took two seconds to put the fudge into a box.

Oh, she did mention that the chocolate/caramel blend was most popular. I could have told you that. I wasn’t even going to leave a tip at all, let alone the 20 percent suggested on the screen.

But I thought, I’ll leave something. So I chose the “custom tip” option and left $1.50. I swear that girl gave me the dirtiest look I have ever seen from anyone behind the counter.

I remember working those jobs and never, ever getting a tip. (I understand times have changed.) The final straw for me was the valet.

My son and I were having breakfast at a hotel near the mall where we were headed for his birthday shopping excursion. We were there less than an hour and the driver didn’t have to take my car very far because when I showed him the ticket, my Honda was back in a flash.

I handed him a five dollar bill. That is my usual “rate” for valet service. Granted, I almost never use valet, so has the customary gratuity gone up?

Again, he looked at the bill and looked at me, not with a dirty look that the ice cream/candy girl gave me, but similar to the stylist’s expression: “You can do better.”

No, I can’t and I won’t. I consider myself a generous tipper. In fact, I leave more than 20 percent to the woman who cuts my hair. (I feel guilty because I started coloring my own hair and only go to her for cuts.)

What is happening? These aren’t isolated incidents. I am not trying to short-change people. I understand that everyone has to make a living and minimum wage doesn’t cut it these days. But come on. What should we feel obligated to pay? 30 percent, 40 percent?

Where does it end? I don’t mind those computer screens at almost every establishment that allow you to choose a tip amount. In fact, I was really happy when Dunkin finally installed one of those. It was a pain to have to bring cash every time I visited the store.

In fact, if I didn’t have the cash, I didn’t go in, because I was embarrassed, and the people behind the counter are so nice (never once guilted me.) Now, I always hit the 20 percent button on the screen, and am happy to…even more during the holidays.

So, do you consider me a cheapskate? Am I short-changing the folks who work hard to make a living, as we all are? No. I refuse to allow anyone to guilt me…and that is exactly what they are doing.

So, I will continue to pay what I want when I want and ignore the looks, the stares and whatever tactic these people use to get you to cough up more money!