My Theory of Karma

I’ve always been unlucky when it comes to love. At least that’s what I told myself every time I fell head over heels and had my heart brutally broken. This happened for ages, eventually throwing me in a loop where my head rotated around “I’ll never fall in love again” and “life is short, don’t give up.”

All my friends seemed to be happily in love and living their best lives, yet I stood still in the same place wondering if anyone cared. Deep inside, I was resigned to the fact that nobody was losing it like me.

I was so lost that I craved even the most toxic love.

Maybe I was looking in the wrong direction for something I already had, but I was never taught to choose right from wrong when my life depended on it.

Grandpa always told me to follow my heart if I ever wanted to be happy. I just wish his words were enough to take me through my darkest moments. The easiest way out was to give up on life and say it’s a cruel world, however, my agony reminded me of one gem called Heidi. The moments we shared haunted me after every tear I cried.

The thought of what I did to Heidi terrified me, yet my biggest regret was the monster my pride created in her. See, the lady fell in love with me long before our youth flared like the liquid rainbow river of Colombia. Little did I know that her selfless intentions of falling in love with me would change my life forever.

I’ve read timeless scripts on tragic love between souls destined to touch the sky, but nothing compares to the pain she endured during our long lifeless relationship. She loved me with such purity I regret losing her to this day.

I foolishly underestimated the trauma she suffered, forgetting that I had never been broken before.

My ignorance kept me in the dark until I met Leto. In my eyes, she exceeded everything I could have ever wanted. A boy who had never felt anything before spent countless nights thinking and writing love letters that never saw the light of day. Someone special descended into my empty life, her presence erasing the last memory of Heidi.

I adored Leto so blindly that I crossed the line of obsession. Her smile hit me like a festival of fragrance from a forbidden garden of roses. Before I knew it, the phrase “I’d take a bullet for you” started making more sense. I could feel my heart of stone immaculately beating for her with excitement.

It looked like I finally had something to live for, but Karma, the architect of payback itself struck. The more my life depended on Leto, the further away she fled from my love.

I hopelessly held on to the thought that the stars would align someday and she’d realize that her destiny was to live forever ever after with me.

After what felt like centuries of waiting, the Golden Rule started ringing in the back of my head;

“Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”

Everyone that breaks this rule is guaranteed to suffer, and I was no different. My torment went on until it led me to Queen Karma’s School of Life. Believing that I had one last chance to change my life, I lost my self in the pursuit of Karma's mechanism. The knowledge I chose to seek gifted me with a short collection wise words only a fool could despise.

“There’s a natural law of Karma that vindictive people, who go out of their way to hurt others, will end up broke and alone.” – Sylvester Stallone

“You cannot do harm to someone because someone has done harm to you. You will pay just like they will.” – Ericka Williams

“Is fate getting what you deserve, or deserving what you get?” – Jodi Picoult

“A boomerang returns back to the person that throws it.” – Vera Nazarian

“Men are not punished for their sins, but by them.” – Elbert Hubbard

Everything I felt for Leto is what Heidi once felt for me, and just like I broke the latter’s heart, the former broke mine twice as hard. I learnt never to hurt anyone again, but Karma has her ways and I’m not sure if she’s done with me.