If You Settle Other Than this, You Are In Disservice To Your Soul

People who only chase pleasure in their intimate life oftentimes seem like the ones who experience a deep sense of freedom, yet they are the ones who are imprisoned the most. At some points, they lost their adventurous spirit as their soul grows tired and weak. They start to decay from the inside, deprived of the greatest gift of life: true and deep intimacy, the intimacy that touches the soul. Their nervous system confuses the rush of adrenaline and excitement that comes from jumping from one relationship to the other with love, while in truth, it is trauma. By chasing the pleasure they do nothing but further perpetuate their trauma. Understanding this insight will change their entire life.

Re-training our nervous system, our body, and remembering how safe love is, actually feels like a battle, the greatest battle someone will ever fight. At times it means to fully surrender to the intensity that is going on in our body, while our nervous system being in total havoc.

But let me tell you this, it is worth it. Gather all your courage and keep going, for on the other side awaits you your true home.

True awakening and healing mean to no longer merely seek pleasure but to seek depth. Depth contains a form of pleasure that is beyond our wildest imagination. When we experience deep intimacy we are grated a small window into the depths of our soul, our untouched and most innocent self. For a brief moment time stands still, all the baggage we have been carrying with us melts away, all worries dissolve in the vast sky of passion and love.

This is not an escape, nor it is an illusion, this is the real you that is untouched by your conditioning, your limiting belief, your darkest thoughts and fear.

Deep intimacy creates a total dis-identification between you and your patterns, your suffering. It offers you a mirror of your true potential, it shows you what is possible if you continue to open your heart and choose to go deeper. It forces you to feel the consequences of not showing up fully, not committing fully and your heart’s closure.

Deep intimacy is so much more than pleasure. It allows you to radically break through the painful patterns created by your shadow, it allows you to access a bliss within you that is beyond words. Deep intimacy means that you heal your core wounds, liberate yourself from your most limiting beliefs and finally realize that how you always yearned to express yourself and your simple beingness is what feels more attractive to your partner. If you settle other than this you are in disservice to your soul.

The safety and trust of deep intimacy are beyond any adventure or excitement that comes from just seeking pleasure. The reason why people think it is the other way around is because staying on the surface level in your intimate relationships allows you to fill the void of loneliness and anxiety within you, for a short period of time. Fleeting relationships give you instant gratification while long-term relationships don’t.

The truth is when you seek just pleasure you suffer from deep loneliness. Behind closed curtains, on your own, you are incapable of being with yourself filled with anxiety, desperately looking for the next best way to fill the pain.

At some point, you have to make a choice to gather all your courage and face yourself in a fire of the conscious relationship. It won’t give you instant gratification, but if you keep going deeper and deeper, then a feeling of bliss and home awaits you that is beyond any imagination.

Contrary to common belief, a long-term relationship is not meant to become boring and it is not normal that love fades with time. In fact the longer you are together, the deeper intimacy, passion, trust and safety should be.

The harsh truth is that the idea that relationships become normal or boring after a while is nothing but an excuse, as what actually happens is that we fall back into our old patterns, our heart closes when tension arises and we do not consciously practice to deepen intimacy, trust and safety.

The only reason why this is seen as “normal” is because we have accepted it at a collective level. We like to believe that it is true, as this way we can avoid facing ourselves and taking responsibility.

In truth, there is unimaginable depth and intimacy awaiting you if you open your heart and mind to the idea that is actually possible to not only sustain deep love and passion for one another but to actively deepen it form moment to moment. This doesn’t mean that you will never experience challenges again, they are simply part of every relationship.

And it is true that the way we love changes. At the beginning there is usually an ecstatic intensity as everything is new, after a while our love becomes more grounded, trust and safety become much more vital. Yet still, boredom, and the fading of love has nothing to do with external factors. It has everything to do with how we show up in our relationship. You cannot expect the intimacy to deepen if you are triggered all the time, blame your partner for you wounds, and live with a closed heart.

Making the decision to open in the right-now moment is the game-changer. It will change your life and relationships forever, especially if you do it impeccably and without compromise. It’s not easy.​ You will confront the fear of the unknown, the anguish of your past, and the terror of potentially facing rejection, hurt and pain. You may feel pathetic in your vulnerable display, wishing instead to be one of those who is bulletproof and hardened. But, you will be able to embrace newness. And newness keeps love thriving.​

The depth of intimacy is determined by the quality of presence we bring to each moment. To give our beloved the full force of our undivided attention and the soft pulse of our unguarded heart is to make love to every molecule of their body, mind and spirit. You can do it anywhere and anytime, no matter how you may feel.

​ Our current collective narrative about what’s possible in a relationship and what’s “normal” is simply false. It is based on old beliefs, limited minds, and closed hearts.

It is time to change that. Depth, the true union with one soul only, offers limitless potential to experience the greatest bliss of life.