I've Realized The Ugly Truth, HR Wants What’s Best For The Company — Not What's Best For Me

Imagine this situation: you are struggling at work: perhaps one of your colleagues is somewhat rude towards you, you feel undervalued or maybe your manager is being too intrusive. What if your issues are not related to the team members but you have questions that need clarification — for example, you would like to take a sick leave because you feel stressed lately but don’t understand the right process.

So what do you do?

Well obviously you go to the HR department: you have a nice, reassuring chat that puts your mind at ease only to find out an unexpected email land in your inbox — the company has decided to let you go.

Surreal?

Quite on the contrary — this is very common and happens on daily basis.

I’ve seen it happen over and over again. I have nothing against the HR department but I prefer to stay away from them. HR is valuable, they know of all the companies assistance programs, how to fill disability paperwork or how to claim some extra benefits.

But HR representatives have quite a unique position in the corporation. Their job should be to support employees when they struggle. But their real job is to do what’s best in the companies interests.

In other words, they will help you only if the company considers you a valuable asset.

Some of my good friends work in the HR department and they are very passionate about helping people. But they are very limited by those who are above them, so they had to make some tough decisions. When an employee comes to the HR department with issues that might jeopardize or harm the company — they had let them go. Instantly.

The company comes first. Employees are just replaceable resources. Remember that HR works for the company — not for you.

If you’ve ever had a talk with HR you would notice how nice, approachable and reassuring they are. Sometimes speaking to the HR representative feels like speaking to a therapist. You feel so safe that you actually open up and raise concerns.

Often the HR representative encourages you to be transparent and to open up. They use common phrases such as “Whatever you say stays between me and you…” or “ Don’t worry whatever you say won’t affect your job”.

Please — don’t be honest with the HR representative.

I’ve seen it backfire too often. Rather be safe than sorry, right?

That is if you want to keep the job for some time. Don’t fall into the trap of having heart to heart with HR. Nothing you tell the HR is confidential — they are not your doctors or priests.

Everything that you say can and will be used against you.

Companies can always find a reason why they could lay you off. Just because you are on maternity leave, sick leave or on vacation doesn’t mean that you haven’t been put on a “blacklist”.

And yes, companies do have “blacklists”— that’s a special little excel table where managers put people down who they would like to get rid of.

Don’t speak about your medical issues to HR or colleagues that you don’t know too well. Rather just take time off or extended leave for medical reasons. When the employer starts asking too many private questions regards to your health — be wary, you may be just on the blacklist. I would suggest making a backup plan or even speaking to the employment lawyer just to understand your rights.

Just recently my good friend took leave, after coming back to work within a month he was fired. When you share your health conditions with the manager or the HR, the employer starts thinking of an immediate replacement.

Think of corporations like a battlefield: and an injured soldier would only slow down the army. The army has no time to wait for him/her to recover.

Don’t share details about your personal life with HR.

Often, managers and HR pry about your personal life. Especially if you are a woman they could ask questions about your marital status, so they assess whether you are planning to have children in the near future. This would of course mean that you would be asking for maternity leave in future which would be quite inconvenient for the company.

There are also employees who like to socialize a lot. I think that’s a good thing, but unfortunately, sometimes instances from your personal life that are shared can reach HR and be exaggerated or even untruthful. Again, I would avoid sharing information about your personal life even when asked directly by your colleagues or HR.

Don’t share your future plans either. My friend’s wife received an offer to relocate to another city for a better job position. My friend wished to relocate with her and would therefore need to work remotely. The issue was that the plan wasn’t yet set in stone: his wife was still waiting for a final offer.

So my friend reached out to his HR department to inform them of the possibility. He was very naive, you see. The HR representative told him that remote work would not be an issue and that he should let them know when the decision is final. They also thanked him for his honesty and for letting them know in advance.

Weeks later, as you’ve guessed — he was fired.

You must also remember that HR usually has no authority to make changes. They can escalate the situation to your manager’s boss, but if no laws are broken, they often won’t have the power to do more beyond that.

And even when the laws are broken— very often the HR would do everything in power together with the legal department to protect themselves from a lawsuit initiated by the employee.

If you want to keep your job, if you need to keep your job, then the sad truth is that you must endure the toxic culture you are working in. And remember that HR is part of that culture.

So to protect yourself just don’t talk to HR.

What is your take on this?

Thank you for reading.

This story was originally published here.