Hated at first sight

The first time I recall being hated at first sight was when I was 7 years old. It was the second day of school in the second grade. My mother worked for a company called Harris Hardwood and had gotten them to send a bunch of wood chips to my classroom for us to play with. The blocks were on the floor and the teacher told us to sit down in groups of 3 or four to play. I sat next to a boy and girl I did not know and immediately they both put their hands on the blocks and told me no. I advised them that my mother is the one who sent the wood to the school and they reluctantly allowed me to play with them.

I recall the first week of school in the 9th grade and I was sitting near 3 other black students whom I did not know personally. One of the girls began asking the lone boy who he was in love with or wanted to date. She named several girls and then she said, "I know, you like Cheryl." This boy I had never even spoken to had a scowl on his face as he shouted, "I hate Cheryl."

The following summer my mother moved to a different apartment complex. My brothers and I lived with our grandparents and they had already spent the weekend with her several times and made new friends. I was excited about getting to know some different girls and perhaps meet a cute boy. The day I finally got to go to my mother's apartment there were a lot of vehicles in the parking lot so she had to park quite far from her home. I got out of the car and walked inside and about 10 minutes later there was a knock on the door.

A teenage girl who lived close by told me that when I went outside not to talk to a girl named Val. She said that when I got out of my other's car, Val had said; "Look at Bill and Bobby's sister, she looks like a long tall Giraffe." I was crushed. I was 5 foot 5 inches which really is not that tall except when those around you are 4 ft 11 -5 ft 2 as was the case. I weighed about 90 lbs. which caused me to look taller and thinner than I really was but I could not help that. I was shocked that someone I never laid eyes on had taken an instant dislike to me and was so ashamed I stayed inside the apartment the entire weekend.

In my senior year in high school, I had a repeat of what happened during y freshman year. I was seated near two black girls and one black guy in English class. One of the girls began asking the boy who he liked and naming names. When she said my name, he screamed just as the boy did 3 years earlier that he hated me. This was not actually the first time I had seen this teenage boy but we had never had an opportunity to talk. I wondered what it was about me that caused people to treat me so bad?

In 1981 I was married and pregnant with my first child. A man I did not know came to the door of the office where I was working and asked for a co-worker who also was named Cheryl. I found her and said there was a cute guy at the door looking for her. A few months later I noticed this man was seated in a vehicle in the company parking lot waiting on Cheryl. As I walked past he asked if I were from the county and I said "Yes".

I assumed he might have known some of my family but I was wrong. He replied to my "yes" with a very hateful, "I thought so." I asked what he meant and he said that he could tell I was "country ' by the way I spoke the day he came to the office. I advised him that he was a man, at the door, looking for Cheryl so what was the big deal. He answered with "You didn't have to say it like that." Again I wondered how someone who did not know me could act as if he hated me. To think that my manner of speech irritated him to the point he held on to it and addressed it 3 months later was unsettling.

People always say there are two sides to every story but my life proves there is not. Sometimes people just hate you at first sight. There are those who are indifferent to people of other races or are LBGTQ. Some individuals dislike those of different religions. For whatever reason, my personality, and my weight when I was thin seemed to rub people the wrong way. It is a shame they did not take the time to get to know me, but it is their loss. I share my stories for others like me who are rejected for trivial reasons. Hold your head up and associate with those who celebrate you, even if it is only a few.