Be at Ease

Be at Ease by Denelsia Walker

Life is a mystery. That is certain. Day to day you never know what you are going to get as far as expectancies in life. Well, I have experienced a lot of questionable situations in my life.

Then I started asking the Universe a lot of questions. Funny, when I started seeking answers. It started answering me back.

The energy an individual dispenses in life is important. Do you know what is even more important? The energy you allow into one's space as well.

I have had quite a year. A lot of unexpected stressors had risen. Camouflaged as part of my resistance as I grow into my becoming. Yet! I kept finding creative ways to surpass them and find peace of mind and balance.

It took a long time to get into the headspace that I am currently in. Therefore, there are many activities I learned to put my mind at ease. First, I had to learn who I was.

After the weight loss surgery; I was still drugged from the anesthesia when I opened my eye and started moving. It was scary in those moments. The instant when I realized paralyzed from the waist down.

What made matters worse was I had just started my menstrual. I was not even able to put in my lady products during this time. I was wondering during this time if I had made the right decision.

I learned that my symptoms were a result of a rhabdomyolysis diagnosis. A rare diagnosis. In which I had to build my protein levels to be able to grow stronger and improve my strength.

I was able to walk in small increments with a walker and was released from the hospital a week later. I took two months off work learning to walk again while using FMLA. I returned to work on my walker.

Once I returned home. After being cared for two months by my supportive parents and sister. I decided to keep the walking and stretching momentum going. My first yoga class was experienced on that walker. The walker and I spent a year together. Her name was Ms. Thrive.

Today, I am no longer on a walker. My weight loss and healing was a success. Seven years later I am no longer at 415 pounds; but 243 pounds.

I learned to love yoga, walking, and have even learned to African and Salsa dance. I use most of my free time for writing poetry, short stories, and songs. I found courage to start a poetry group with weekly challenges called International Poetry Whore.

Painting is now a favorite pastime. Maturing came when I realized;” Darling dearest; that is not free time.” Also, that self-care is essential when healing.

I enjoy performance poetry and singing. Since, I have embraced transformation. I became open to writing a few rap verses for my last two songs I wrote. Something I would not have even considered or would have frowned upon in the past for a woman of my age.

My heart is still set on singing versus rapping. I love creating. No matter what part of the growth stage that I am in despite how I am feeling. Even if that creation does not turn out the way I think it should. I have a blast doing it. I am very thankful.

A few other things I enjoy for relaxation are playing piano, percussion instruments, and going to the studio collaborating with others on projects. This past year my dad and I did a duet together. That fulfilled a top childhood dream on my bucket list.

The track is in regard to people losing their lives due to Covid, loved ones having to sleep in another room to keep their other loved one from getting the virus. It also touched on the importance of essentials, George Floyd. How it is hard to literally physically, mentally breathe, in today's social graces, climate, and condition overall.

It was a piece that was musically produced and lyrically co-written with a young man from Africa. It is one of my favorite moments in time. Having my normal music producer and someone here from the USA work together on a track meant for global incorporation toward our world's healing.

Nothing would make me happier than to see my dad featured in the first theatre play beside me. I would enjoy us having more father and daughter time. I look forward to crossing more stolen moments off my bucket list.

Learning new ideas is a huge thrill and release. It is seeing a new continent and experiencing it for the first time. It is tasting Remy Martin when one is only used to cheap Chardonnay wine. I ate frog legs and raw oysters for the first time. Delightful to have those items versus the usual Micky D’s kids meal. It is indeed a brand new world that I was previously unaware of.

It is my inbox raining men and women. Yet, I have not had time to talk with them. Why? I have been busy creating new products, scheduling my next place to vendor, or practicing for new gigs.

The new nickname for myself is Ms. Weather Girl. Except, I am taking my umbrella with me in this rain. I will turn it upside down to catch it and pour the water on the household plants.

Recently, I picked up educating myself on Tarot Cards to do readings. Currently, I am finishing up my first Tarot Journal. I also have started on two more poetry books. One concerning topics that need to be addressed in the African American community. The other is an erotica poetry novel.

For the erotica novel I took my first Boudoir pictures. I believe it was a good idea for the African American themed lingerie line I am starting. I had four pieces created already. The pictures from the session turned out fantastic.

I learned how to design business cards and flyers. The flyers contain my biography and links on one side. The other side are pictures with people who have purchased my books. It also has a picture of dad and I after a performance.

The business cards contain a picture of "I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings." Artwork memoir by Abdul Mohammed and Adreia Hawkins dedicated to Maya Angelou. It was featured on display at the Indianapolis Art Council downtown. May Adreia, who also created my Supreme Reign Love Redefined book design, rest in peace.

To me that is historic. I hope to make more of his and her stories with the signed contract of new upcoming play. Dreaming of seeing more sunshine after many rainy days.

I have been creating books, CDs, posters, events, shirts, jewelry, and lingerie. All while meeting some wonderful people while on this new found journey. Now a lot of pluses have occurred on these new roads. For everything positive accomplished I have had to slay a dragon of resistance before and after the fog.

My latest two poetry books ended up getting picked up by JL King publishing. We revised Supreme Reign Love Redefined into one book. I skimmed, revamped, and reorganized it to have less materials in it.

I was super excited about my first book interview with him. It was an event I planned with the dopest poetry line up, singer, band, host, dj, and photographer. I advertised heavily. I am brewing over with joy from the event.

I will share one of the poems not included in the revision of the new book. Think the message suits the topic for this challenge.

Poem:

Diminutive Sections Deemed Dire for Destinies Quilt Distinction

Each of us is diverse, exhilarating, and unique.

We make up the fabrication in this woven piece.

Traces of blood used from our past royalty.

It’s important we all share.

Our gifts, talents, hopes, and imaginings.

Weave with silk.

Nurture with tenderness.

Show kindness.

Actually, do care.

The many colorful patches are the ones you put there.

Born you.

So that’s who you are to be.

Although accountable in the makings of your destiny;

Remember you are not the only patch.

You are part of the intricate beautiful color scheme.

Amongst a never-ending quilt.

Always Stand Out!

Not even two colors of the pattern remarkably compare.

Take risks.

Do intentionally,

Make judgments that dare.

You could decide to exclude the instinctive outline?

Shake off the foundations that naturally are to be.

Not partake in the ultimate masterpiece.

Dang the needle, oh too dull!

The thread, oh too short!

The type of materials you’ve been given, Hmmmm too tough!

Not covering or applying your purpose as only it has been chosen.

Which only “YOU” have interlaced rights to knit its existence.

Do you inquire if what you have available, and what you are working with, is an adequate amount to contribute even a fraction?

Be careful when weaving what is covered from your mouthpiece.

Use it to establish future unforeseen designs.

Pay attention to details.

Double support the edge of the corners.

Making sure to nix any that may appear, to claim un-ravel-ment.

Always speak entwined life.

Remember everything you need, are, and have to succeed resides in you.

Made readily accessible for only you to formulate.

Now residing at your fingertips.

Precision’s string.

Question is, will you pull the needle through the thread?

Desperately Desired: Diminutive Sections Deemed Dire for Destinies Quilt Distinction

Eat, love, pray, learn, and grow. Do not be afraid to face your shadows. Most of all; let your feet feel the warmth of sand on a nice day at the beach. Let the sun beam on your face; as the water trickles over your toes. Inner peace is a magnificent relationship with yourself that reflects self-love.